It Just Happened, page 9
She giggled, kicking the water and sand up at me with her feet. I looked down at the wet sand that now covered my calves and ran to her, scooping her up in my arms, and spinning her around.
When I finally put her down and she stopped laughing, she walked over to where something was shimmering in the morning light. “Sea glass,” I noted.
She looked back at me before bending down and picking it up. “It’s so beautiful,” she cooed. “I don’t think I’ve ever seen anything this gorgeous before.”
“I know I have,” I replied, observing how happy finding sea glass made her.
She rolled her eyes and swatted my arm as I came closer. “I’m serious.” She handed it to me. “Look how pretty.”
I held it in my hand. She was right, it was beautiful. This one was blue-green and shined so bright. “The ocean is full of surprises,” I said.
She sighed. “They come from broken glasses, right?”
“Sure, or even shipwrecks. It tumbles around in the ocean for a while, which is why the edges aren’t as sharp, and then finally it washes ashore, where people like you find it in the sand.”
She stood on her tip-toes and brushed a kiss on my cheek. “Well, I think they’re beautiful.”
I looked around and had an idea. “Find more.”
“What?” she asked. “Why?”
“So we never forget this moment.”
“Lance,” she said, “I don’t think I’m going to forget this moment with or without the sea glass.”
“Come on, beautiful, it’ll be just something you and I know about. It’ll be our special thing.”
“Finding sea glass?”
I nodded. “Fine, but you should keep the sea glass. You obviously appreciate it more.”
“You need something to remember this moment by,” I countered.
“I’ll take sand.”
“I like that. Sand and sea glass, like us, meant to be. You’re the sea glass, by the way,” I pointed out.
She quirked a brow. “I don’t really think sea glass belongs in the sand.”
I chuckled. “Just go with it.”
“Fine, but you’re way too cute, you know that?”
“What were you thinking about?” Gemma asked, her voice breaking me from my reverie. “Must have been something that made you happy because you’re smiling.”
I shook my head, trying to push those thoughts to the back of my mind again. “Just thinking about my appointments today,” I lied. “It’s going to be a long day for me.” It was better that I didn’t bring up the past and muddle the present. Neither of us needed that.
She nodded. “I still can’t believe people voluntarily risk their lives on a surfboard.”
“Risks make life worth living.” At least, I always believed so. Without all the risks I’d taken, my life would be nothing. I wouldn’t have kept Mason, I wouldn’t have found this place that became my home away from home, or even taken the biggest risk of all by getting into bed with this woman who was also working for the resort three years ago.
“Spoken like a true adventurer.”
I gave her a confused look. I was definitely not an adventurer, just willing to do the little things that kept life exciting. But to her, I could see how she’d see me that way. Gemma liked everything neat and tidy, organized, with everything having a place and in its place. Me, I threw caution to the wind and didn’t worry so much about what would come next, aside from those things that would have an impact on my son, then I was much more careful.
“Never mind,” she said. “What I’m trying to say is, you’ll never see me out on one of those things. Those waters are unpredictable and you don’t know what’s going to happen.”
“You take risks every single day, Gemma. You just don’t realize it. Driving is a risk. Car accidents happen more often than you think. Technically, beaches often have bacteria or other harmful substances lurking in the water or on the sand. You’re taking a risk right now just being here with me.”
Her nose wrinkled like she was trying to make sense of that. Then she dropped her voice and said, “I took a risk the last time I was here and practically jeopardized my whole business. I had clients threatening to leave me, my sister went through a breakup and needed me, but I wasn’t there, where I should’ve been. I was here, in Miami, miles and miles away from my responsibilities.”
I inhaled deeply. “I didn’t know any of that.”
She angled her head to the side. “How could you?”
I felt bad for her. Sorry that she couldn’t see a path for herself to happiness, that she put so much on her shoulders. She didn’t deserve that kind of pressure. “You should learn to let people in. Not everyone will disappoint you, you know.” I had a feeling that was what it was all about for her, fear that if she gave up an inch, she’d lose a mile, whether of herself or the control she had, I didn’t know, but it felt a fitting reminder.
She swayed her head back and forth and then stopped to look directly at me. “You always understood me.”
“I know.”
Eyes narrowed, she laughed out of the blue, probably due to nerves. “Hey, how’s your son doing?” Gemma asked suddenly.
“He’s good,” I answered. “Growing like a weed.”
“You’re lucky to have him.”
I heard her voice crack and had a feeling this had to do with the fact that she once told me she always wanted to have a family of her own, but between work and her lack of a serious relationship, she didn’t see that happening anytime soon. I guessed nothing much changed in that department for her, which was a shame. Gemma would make a great mother, I knew.
“That I am,” I agreed.
She smiled and got up, taking her blanket and folding it back up to put in her purse. “We should probably be going.”
I nodded and got up, brushing the sand off myself. She was right and I had work to get to, appointments to take. But that didn’t mean I wanted to leave her. “Gemma,” I called out, before we walked away and I lost my chance, “I don’t regret it.”
When she turned around and her eyes sparkled, I knew she knew what I was talking about. I didn’t regret what we did three years ago and I needed her to know that. It was difficult saying goodbye and I wished we never did, but I didn’t regret it for one second. “Me neither,” she said softly and I fought the urge to reach out and pull her into my arms.
Chapter Twelve
Gemma
Sophie popped a pretzel in her mouth and then passed the bag to Coco who was sitting on the bed next to her. I walked out of the bathroom wearing a pink bikini with white polka dots on it. “Now that’s the one,” Sophie said, her mouth curling into a wicked smile. “You look hot.”
I couldn’t believe I was looking to my sister and her best friend to tell me whether or not I was wearing the right thing for my surfing lesson. I knew it wasn’t exactly the point of my last conversation with Lance, but I decided it was a good first step in the right direction.
The truth was, I had become more closed off since I last saw Lance and I missed the way I used to be with him. Being with him reminded me of that. Maybe there was a way I could be less of a party pooper while not shirking my responsibilities. I didn’t have to choose, did I? I could have it both ways. Said no one ever.
I looked down and started pulling at the triangle top. “It doesn’t have enough material.”
“What exactly is this for?” Coco asked. “Why do you care about surfing and what you wear?”
Soph pulled her feet up under her. “Yeah, actually, I’m curious, too. I thought we were going to lounge by the pool today. Why are you going rogue on my bach party?”
The guilt nagged at me. This wasn’t me. I shouldn’t have been abandoning my sister, she was right, but I also made an impulsive decision to take a lesson with Lance and I really wanted to see it through. They had to know. So I pushed Coco over a bit to make room for myself and plopped down on the bed.
I took my sister’s hands in my own. “Soph,” I started, “I really want to do this. Please tell me it’s okay. I need to do this,” I pleaded, thinking to myself just how important it was suddenly for me to do this. It was like I needed to do this for myself, if for no other reason than to prove to myself that I could be like the girl I once was again.
Laughing, my sister pulled her hands back from mine. “Stop, of course, it’s fine. I like seeing you have fun. It’s okay. This trip is my party, technically, but I don’t mind. Look at Daphne, sneaking out to make out with a hunky stranger. She doesn’t care one iota, so why should you?”
“True.” These girls just played by a whole other set of rules than I did.
Soph resumed her speech, “But I do want to know what’s going on and you have to tell me.” She raised an eyebrow and waited.
Coco leaned around and put her chin on my shoulder, clearly getting very comfortable around me lately. “Yeah, dish.”
I looked over at Coco, then back to my sister and swallowed hard. How could I put it? “I had a somewhat of a fling with a guy when I was here last time. He’s the surf instructor.”
Bouncing up and down, Soph squealed. “Oh, my, why didn’t you tell me!”
“You little hussy,” Coco said, standing up and winking at me as though not to show Sophie that she knew before her about my fling. “I didn’t think you had it in you, Gemma. Good for you.” Then she shot a finger in the air. “Wait, this is the same twelve you ran into, right?”
I visibly cringed when my sister looked at us confused. So much for keeping the fact that she knew first between us. “Yeah. He was single then and still is now. We just ran into each other,” I explained.
“What?” my sister demanded, still bouncing, her excitement evident. “Never mind, not the point. I’m so proud of you. Coco’s right, good for you!”
Coco pointed an accusatory finger at me. “That’s why you want to take this lesson. That explains it.”
I inhaled deeply. “I just thought it might be fun,” I defended, “but I don’t know, maybe I’m losing it. This is all so wild.”
“What’s his name?”
“Yeah, tell us about him,” Coco inserted.
“Lance. He has a son. Tell me this isn’t totally random and reckless.”
“That’s the point,” Coco said, chuckling. “Life’s too short to live like a monk. Besides, he’s the one with the kid, not you, so he knows what he’s doing. You have to trust that.”
“But we’re not doing anything now. I don’t know why I’m even doing this.”
Sophie raised an eyebrow and came to stand directly in front of me so we were face to face. “You’re doing this because you deserve it and because for whatever reason this guy means something to you, otherwise we wouldn’t be standing here watching you obsess over bathing suits. Gemma, this means something and I insist you do it. You cannot back out now. It’d be like criminal and I’m the bride-to-be, I call the shots, remember.” When she finished, she turned around and sat back down on the bed picking up her bag of pretzels again and crunching down on one.
Coco nodded. “She’s right. You worry too much.”
“I’m not as young as I used to be,” I mumbled, scanning myself in the bikini. “I don’t know,” I decided, shaking my head. “Maybe this is a bad idea. It’s been three years.” I was really starting to doubt whether or not I could be trusted to make any decisions where Lance Easton was concerned.
Soph practically jumped off the bed, coming over to me and grabbing my shoulders in my obvious time of need, leading me back into the bathroom. “Look,” she instructed as we both looked in the mirror at me. “You’re beautiful.”
“There’s something I haven’t told you,” I confessed, biting my lip and turning to her. “He’s younger than me.” Maybe now she’d see why I was so worried.
She didn’t look fazed.
“A decade younger than me,” I further confessed.
Her mouth fell open, but then she closed it shut.
“I knew this was a bad idea,” I insisted, trying to undo the top and get undressed. “Get out. I’m getting undressed. I’m not going.”
Sophie shook her head, adamant about this. “You’re going.”
Coco strolled in, a finger to her lips. “You’re wrong, you know.”
I tilted my head, confused. “About what?”
“Age doesn’t matter to most men,” she said, shrugging. “And he clearly liked you three years ago when you were still a decade apart. If he didn’t, he wouldn’t have slept with you.”
“That was different. I’m even older now and he’s still in his twenties!” Didn’t anyone understand?
Sophie placed a hand under her chin and backed up, sizing me up. “Fine, then don’t go.” She was going the tough love route. “You’re probably right. He’s not going to want to date a woman who isn’t confident and he’s certainly not going to want to date a grandma.”
“Hey,” I cut her off, pointing a finger in her direction, “point taken.”
“So you’ll go?” she asked, her face practically beaming with excitement.
I couldn’t believe I was actually going to do this. That I was going to voluntarily see Lance again and take a surf lesson, no less. Man, I always seemed to lose my mind where Lance was concerned, no question there. And yet, aside from my momentary freak out, I still really wanted to do it. “I’m going,” I exclaimed.
“Wait!” Coco said, putting a finger up before turning to leave. When she came back, she was holding a stick of lip gloss. “Watermelon. It’s shimmery, so it lures them in, and tastes good, so they can’t help but suck on your lips longer.”
”That’s mine,” Sophie told me, giggling, “but you can use it.”
I took it and swiped it over my lips. “I feel silly wearing watermelon lip gloss. Plus, I’m not looking for him to kiss me or anything. I’m supposed to be getting in the water.”
“Sure you’re not.” Sophie blew bubbles. “Sis, how stupid do you think we are? You’re totally hoping he’ll kiss you.”
I looked back at myself in the mirror and exhaled. It was now or never, I supposed. If I didn’t get up the courage to do this now, I may never. And it was just Lance. I mean, I’d been intimate with the man before, this should be nothing. I was just being silly. Yeah, everything was going to be just fine.
I’d keep things casual and act less awkward.
He’d be his usual charming self.
Oh, I was in big trouble.
Sophie practically pushed me out the door. “You’re going to be late!”
I looked back as she kept pushing me, shoving a cover-up at me. Coco passed her my sunglasses, which she then passed to me. “Go!” she cried. “And get dressed in the elevator!”
I held on to the doorframe before leaving, my stuff clutched to my chest. “Are you sure I look all right?”
She swatted my butt and giggled. “You look hot,” she said, grinding her teeth and acting like a total caveman to further the point. “We’ll be here waiting for a full report when you’re done.”
I rolled my eyes. “Ironic that I’m the older one when you’re so pushy.” And with that, Sophie closed the door in my face.
Now I could only look forward. To the elevator where I was going down to the lobby and eventually walking over to the beach. Where Lance would be there waiting for me with a surfboard and that smile that soaked my panties and made me reconsider every single life choice I had ever made.
I’d never been this way with another man before. I didn’t need a man, didn’t ever care one way or another. Never had. But Lance? He was different. He was my weakness. I couldn’t say no to him and I didn’t want to. Ever.
The last time I said no to him, I left this place and never looked back. Three years flew by and I tried my best to not give him a second thought, but sometimes when I was sitting in bed alone or swimming in my pool, I thought back to the memories we shared. I always wondered what my life would look like right now if I hadn’t walked out of the hotel room that day. If I hadn’t left him the way I did.
We both knew it wasn’t going to last, that it was only meant to be what it was—a fling. That didn’t make things any easier, though. Quite the opposite, I wanted more. Feelings were involved as much as I lied to him and myself and said they weren’t.
But he had Mason.
And I had my work, my clients.
Then there was Soph and my parents. I didn’t want to leave my family.
Not that anything had really changed.
Things weren’t simple back then and they weren’t simple now.
Even if we did get together again, it would only be for a short period. Until I had to leave again. That was all it would ever be—stolen moments in time. It was a fantasy.
Oh, but it was the best kind.
And yet I didn’t know if that was fair to either one of us.
As I walked onto the beach, I looked around and immediately spotted him. He was wearing yellow board shorts that only looked better on him because of his tanned skin. His dirty blond hair was wet like he’d already been in the water and all I wanted to do was run my hands through it. To observe him watching me run my hands through it.
I pushed those thoughts aside. This was just a surf lesson. Yes, I knew Lance and sure he was the one who convinced me to take one, but it was an experience, that was all. This could never be anything more than what it was. I had to remember that. For both of us. It was for the best, really. Anything else would have just muddled the waters that were already pretty murky.
Lance eyed me up and down before looking into my eyes. His had a mischievous look in them and I knew I had to immediately shut it down.
“You better have brought your patience,” I warned, knowing I’d be a slow study.
He smiled, clearly understanding where I was trying to steer this conversation—away from our physical attraction toward one another. “Naturally,” he said, holding up his hand. Then he smirked. “Now if I were to look away and sigh heavily or roll my eyes, that doesn’t count, right?”
I gasped and swatted his arm. “You’re bad.”
