The Lady Must Choose, page 5
“Yes...well...I was concerned nevertheless,” Spencer replied.
“Thank you. As you can see, I’m fine and healthy. No repercussions from my time in the river.” Her body may have recovered from the ordeal, but her mind would never forget the terror of thinking she was going to die.
“I thank God for it,” Spencer said as his attentions were suddenly across the room. “May I inquire as to whom the gentleman is that assisted Newbury in rescuing us?”
Bella explained about Aaron Bradford.
“Shouldn’t he be running his company back in America?”
Could Spencer be jealous of Bradford? “I wouldn’t know. Perhaps you should ask him.” Bella didn’t know what to make of this side of Spencer. She’d never seen him appear to outwardly dislike someone before. Not even Myles and he’d considered him competition. Did he consider Bradford as competition for her affections as well?
“I hope you don’t think I’m prying, but please tell me what transpired with Myles earlier. I had just arrived and heard all sorts of shocking explanations being whispered about.”
Bella struggled to keep her feet moving. One look at the concern on Spencer’s face, and she knew he worried for her. “It’s nothing really. Myles saw someone from his past walk into the ballroom and froze. I bumped into him and we tumbled down. End of story.”
Time for her to change the topic of their conversation. “Has either of your sisters received any marriage proposals this season?” Bella would be surprised if they hadn’t. Both girls were lovely. Mary, quiet and somewhat shy. Elizabeth, well, she reminded Bella of herself. Outspoken and opinionated. Bella was convinced there was the right gentleman out there for Elizabeth.
“No,” Spencer replied. “And I must admit I’m worried. Not about finding a suitable husband for Mary, but for Elizabeth. You know how she can be? I think most of the young gentlemen, right out of University, are afraid of her. I believe she needs a little older, more seasoned man who can appreciate her attributes.”
“What about Lord Amesbury, or my brother, Sebastian?” Bella suggested. Playing matchmaker might take her mind off her own pathetic life.
“I believe Lord Sebastian is already spoken for, if Myles’s sister, Lady Marissa, has anything to say about it.” Spencer paused and looked from left to right, scanning the room for available gentlemen. “Lord Amesbury might be a good match for Mary—Elizabeth—I don’t believe so. Although, I could be wrong as they are dancing together now and appear quite taken with one another.”
Bella strained her neck looking for them. Finally she glimpsed the waltzing couple over on the left side of the dance floor. They did seem engrossed in a deep conversation. Not a serious one, as both Amesbury and Elizabeth smiled often. Amesbury did not smile much, as far as Bella’s recollection could recall. “They do make a lovely couple. Has Amesbury called on her?” Bella could breathe freely now that the pain in her heart eased somewhat. Placing her attention on others helped.
***
Spencer didn’t know how to answer. He didn’t want to appear a negligent brother, but truth be told, he disappeared every afternoon so he wouldn’t have to deal with potential suitors. He left the job to his grandmother. If a gentleman didn’t meet with her approval, they would know it. She would have him escorted out the door promptly. Would Amesbury meet his grandmother’s strict list of attributes a suitor must possess? Spencer believed so. “My grandmother oversees the callers in the afternoon. I’d rather not get involved until one comes to me with an offer. So to answer your question, I’m embarrassed to say I don’t know. Perhaps I should inquire. It would be an honor to have Amesbury in the family.”
“Do you know why Lady Beth’s father broke off her engagement with Amesbury and what illness plagued him?” Bella queried.
Two years past, Amesbury had come down with a mysterious illness and his betrothal to Lady Elizabeth Duncan was called off. Spencer often wondered about what happened. The illness was a well guarded secret as was the broken engagement. Personally, he thought Lady Beth and Amesbury did not suit. They were both rather quiet and Lady Beth was also painfully shy. He imagined their conversations were rather dull in nature. Now seeing Amesbury with his sister, Elizabeth, she brought out the man hidden inside. He appeared to be enjoying himself immensely.
“I’m sorry to say, once again, I cannot answer you,” Spencer said, puzzled about all the secrecy. “Rumors were he took a lover and Lady Beth’s father was appalled. I don’t believe it to be truthful. Lady Beth’s father has several mistresses. I believe she became tired of waiting for him to show her any kind of affection. She might have panicked, afraid her married life to him would be cold and lonely. Some people still hold out for the ever elusive love.”
Bella frowned. “Why do you call love elusive? Surely you believe in love. Look at my family. The duke and duchess are in love. Lord Bridgeton and Amelia are the perfect example of a couple in love. He is your cousin, don’t you agree?”
Oh, Spencer agreed wholeheartedly. Bridgeton and Amelia loved one other. And if his cousin could find the kind of love that withstood gossip, tragic deaths, attempted murder and prison, why couldn’t he? He had none of those demons haunting him.
Spencer believed himself in love with the woman dancing within the confines of his arms.
But how did one know?
Love could be fleeting.
When true love stole ones heart, how did one recognize it?
Perhaps one did and perhaps one did not. How sad to think of true love passing over someone because they were not paying attention. Spencer had never paid much attention to the emotions he felt with a woman, until he met Lady Isabella Seabrook.
When in Bella’s company, he paid close attention to his heart, mind and soul, which was not a wise thing. He needed to observe her and see if she reciprocated any of those feelings toward him. Some days he thought so. Others he did not. Of course, it could all be an act on her part. They had made that silly arrangement. Spencer had hoped, in time, he would steal her heart from Myles. He didn’t think he’d succeeded thus far. He could still try. Anyone could see something had transpired between her and Myles on the dance floor. Something catastrophic. It gave him hope. He only hoped it wasn’t false hope.
The next time Spencer managed to get her alone he would kiss her. One could never tell about these sorts of things until some intimacy was reached. If he kissed her and felt nothing, well then, he’d have his answer. Please do not let me feel nothing. Earlier he noticed she appeared taken with Mr. Bradford. Maybe he would be the gentleman of her affections. The sudden heaviness in his chest could not be ignored.
“Spencer,” Bella said as the music concluded, pulling him out of his introspect. “If you please, would you escort me back to my mother?”
Spencer did as she requested and left the ballroom in search of something strong to drink.
***
Bella once again took a seat beside her mother. This time she hoped the men on her dance card didn’t find her. She’d enjoyed her waltz with Spencer as she always did, although, something appeared different with him. Most of the time he’d appeared lost in thought. His face took on a faraway look. One minute he’d scowl and the next smile. He’d never behaved in a similar way with her before and it puzzled her. She hoped he wasn’t coming down with something?
She did enjoy seeing her brother, Sebastian and Marissa dancing. Marissa and she had much in common. Both loved men since they were young girls. Bella wished with all her heart that Marissa had better luck with Sebastian than she did with Myles. One quick glance at Amesbury and Elizabeth confirmed her suspicions. They were taken with each other. Amesbury deserved to love and be loved. Tragedy had befallen his family several years ago. A carriage accident left his parents and only sister dead. The light went out of Amesbury’s eyes that day. Seeing some of the light come back into them made Bella smile, even as the light was being extinguished from hers. Would tonight ever end?
***
“Coward,” Myles chastised himself. “You’re a coward. Go out there and find out why Sophie is here.” Taking several deep breaths, Myles entered the ballroom after his uncomfortable conversation with Bella. The hurt he witnessed in her eyes would forever plague him. Bloody hell, he was a ghastly man for causing her so much pain and anguish. He hoped in time he could make it up to her.
Wentworth didn’t seem pleased with him either. Why would he, when Myles broke his sister’s heart? He wasn’t even all that thrilled with himself. How could he have been so careless with Bella’s affections? At thirty-years-old he should’ve known better. But ever since his time in America, he’d been confused and not knowing his own heart. He had planned on marrying Bella before he left on that fateful trip across the Atlantic. Since then, he’d been torn with remorse when it came to her. Bloody hell, he deserved her scorn and more.
His eyes scanned around for Sophie, all the while ignoring the whispers. Sophie and his cousin, Gerard, stood extremely close together over by the refreshment table. Myles’s long legs ate up the distance as his pulse hummed inside his body, and his fingers itched to curl themselves around Gerard’s throat.
“Cousin, welcome home. How were your travels to America?” It took all Myles’s focus to force a good-natured smile and not act on his previous thoughts.
“Norwich.” Gerard nodded his head. “My travels proved fruitful. I would like to present you to my wife, Sophie. We met on the ship crossing the Atlantic and married once we arrived in England. “My dear Sophie, you remember my cousin, Lord Norwich.”
Wife—married—wife. Myles did not understand. Sophie had married a Frenchman. How could she be married to his cousin?
“Lord Norwich,” Sophie curtsied and extended her hand, which Myles somehow managed to take without hesitation. “It is a pleasure to see you again. Gerard and I speak of you often.”
“Myles bowed over her hand and looked into her eyes, seeking answers. The brown, innocent eyes he remembered so well were gone and replaced with cold, dark ones. He shivered. “It’s my pleasure to welcome you into the family.” What happened to the young, innocent Sophie he remembered?
“Have you spoken to your father recently?” Gerard interjected.
“Not since the day before yesterday,” Myles answered, puzzled by the turn of the conversation to his father.
“I sent a note explaining my marriage and how I could not live in my bachelor quarters any longer. I asked if Sophie and I could reside temporarily at Norwich Mansion. I recently purchased a home, but it needs extensive renovations. He has agreed.”
Myles’s heart stopped. He could not possibly have heard Gerard correctly. They were going to live with his family? Myles did not think he would survive seeing Sophie every day. No, not days, years, because renovations could take years to complete.
“Well now, this is a surprise.” Myles hoped his voice didn’t give away his true feelings. “How nice to have you both staying with us. Mother will be pleased. If you’ll excuse me, I believe I owe a young lady a dance.”
Myles owed no one a dance. But he didn’t think he could spend another minute in their company as anger simmered inside him. What happened to her? The woman who married his cousin was a stranger. Nothing of the Sophie he’d thought he loved existed anymore. How could he have been so mistaken? He realized now that he’d been obsessed with a person who didn’t really exist. And obsession had nothing to do with love, real love. He had fabricated the perfect woman in his mind, believing her to be Sophie when the perfect woman was right before his eyes all this time. Bella.
“Bella,” he whispered, beautiful, sweet, outspoken Bella. What a terrible mistake he’d made. What a bloody arse he was. After his actions and the words he’d said to her tonight, he deserved the punishment of having Sophie and Gerard live with his family.
***
Inside the quiet calm of her bed chamber later that evening, Bella lay beneath the covers, her eyes wide open. As exhausted as her mind and body were, sleep eluded her. Three gentlemen’s faces and voices plagued her every thought, making sleep impossible, again. Three Seasons ago she met Mr. Stuart Spencer for the first time and barely gave him a passing thought. She had had eyes for Myles alone. That was not to say she did not notice Spencer. Hard not to when she danced with him often enough, and he entertained her with his charming wit. She truly enjoyed his company. In many ways he was like Myles. Perhaps that was what drew her to him in the first place.
After her waltz with Spencer, he escorted her back to her mother and she thought he’d acted odd. Why had all the gentlemen acted strange during the evening? First Myles, then Spencer. Had Spencer too, fallen in love with a mysterious woman? Bella’s heart lay heavy inside her chest. Had she lost all the men who once sought out her favors?
Mr. Bradford. She knew practically nothing about him, but one look into his eyes and she witnessed the guarded look. He had a past, one she wanted to know about. He hinted at things. But what things? Horrible things? Was he running from the authorities in America? Sometimes her mind would not stop, and it frustrated her to no end.
Bella wanted her sister, Amelia. Talking about her feelings with her sister always helped. But she and Bridgeton lived in his family home. The only other one in the house she could confide her confused feelings to was Emma. At this late hour, she would never dare disturb Emma and Wentworth in their private chambers. It wasn’t out of fear for her brother, more out of respect for their private marriage time together. They deserved it after all they’d been through.
Should she seek out Sebastian? No, goodness, no. Oh dear, she was alone with her racing thoughts. Not until the sun peeked through the window curtains did Bella’s muscles finally relax, her heart slow and the lids of her eyes shut, allowing her some much desired rest.
Chapter Seven
Bella, feeling refreshed even though she slept little, descended the main elegant staircase the following morning. At the base her eyes came to rest on three enormous, deep red rose bouquets in crystal vases sitting on the mahogany hall table.
“Wonderful,” Wentworth grumbled as he came down the stairs right after her and sneezed. “Will this Season never end? I cannot take another torturous day with my allergies. Who started this tradition of sending ladies flowers? I presume these gentlemen will call upon you this afternoon. Once they leave, have these flowers moved to your chambers. I’ve suffered enough trying to marry my sisters off.”
“Wentworth.” Bella laughed. “Be honest, when I’m married and living with my husband, you will miss me.”
Her brother frowned, his eyes watered and he sneezed. “I’ll never admit to such a thing. Is Amelia coming for afternoon tea?”
Bella could tell he missed Amelia almost as much as she did. “Yes. I told her she must even before I received these lovely flowers.” She paused, leaned down and inhaled the fragrant blooms. “They smell divine.” Bella read the cards. “We should expect Mr. Spencer and Mr. Bradford for tea.” She picked up the third vase of roses and gave them to the first servant she saw, an upstairs maid. “Take these to your quarters and enjoy them.”
“Who were they from?” Wentworth’s brow rose in silent question.
“Whom do you think? What person need beg my forgiveness? Forgiveness I might never grant.” The thought of never forgiving Myles twisted her stomach up tight. She experienced a moment’s guilt for carelessly disregarding his flowers. Flowers she admitted were beautiful.
“Please excuse me, dear sister, I believe a visit to the giver of those roses you gave away is necessary. Will you please extend my apologies to Emma for running out before breakfast? I’ll return before afternoon tea.”
As she watched her brother leave with concern spread across his features, she wondered if he was worried because Myles sent her flowers or because of the American lady. Which brought to the forefront of her mind what secrets Wentworth and Myles hid regarding this Sophie woman. By the strange way her brother reacted last evening to the news of Myles’s lady love from America arriving in London, she was convinced they were hiding something. And why was Sophie here if Myles said she was married?
Bella had tried to ignore the change in Myles and make excuses for his behavior. After what transpired last evening, she had to come to terms with the fact he didn’t love her. As much as his honesty broke her heart, she had to accept it. She would lock away the love she had for him in a safe place and go on with her life. What choice did she have? She refused to wallow in self-pity. Refused to become a burden to her family because of a broken heart.
People sometimes referred to her as strong minded. Now would be a good time to use the attribute.
The time had come for her to give attention to her other gentlemen callers, mainly Spencer and Mr. Bradford. Myles could no longer take up her whole heart. She needed to free up space for someone else.
Her heart cried out in pain. A pain she would learn to live with, minute by minute, day by day. After taking a deep inhale of the fragrant roses, she entered the bright yellow breakfast room. Empty. Was everyone in her family sleeping in after last evening’s ball?
***
“You look awful,” Wentworth said as he was shown into his friend’s study. Myles still wore his previous evenings clothing. Although one would have to look closely to make the distinction. His cravat was missing, and the buttons to his waistcoat and shirt were partly undone. His face was drawn with tension, and he looked as though he hadn’t slept in days.
“Thanks,” Myles said as he drained the contents of his crystal glass and began pacing the room. “I’ve had better days and nights. Last night, well...It didn’t go as planned.”
“As planned? I would say not. You managed to make enemies of my wife, Bella and Amelia. Bella gave your flowers to a maid. I don’t think she will forgive you anytime soon.” Wentworth rubbed his chin and glared at one of his best friends, the other being Amesbury. “As far as my forgiving you for breaking my sister’s heart, I’ll think on it. In the meantime, I’ll continue to be your friend. As you look like you need one right now.”
“Thank you. As you can see, I’m fine and healthy. No repercussions from my time in the river.” Her body may have recovered from the ordeal, but her mind would never forget the terror of thinking she was going to die.
“I thank God for it,” Spencer said as his attentions were suddenly across the room. “May I inquire as to whom the gentleman is that assisted Newbury in rescuing us?”
Bella explained about Aaron Bradford.
“Shouldn’t he be running his company back in America?”
Could Spencer be jealous of Bradford? “I wouldn’t know. Perhaps you should ask him.” Bella didn’t know what to make of this side of Spencer. She’d never seen him appear to outwardly dislike someone before. Not even Myles and he’d considered him competition. Did he consider Bradford as competition for her affections as well?
“I hope you don’t think I’m prying, but please tell me what transpired with Myles earlier. I had just arrived and heard all sorts of shocking explanations being whispered about.”
Bella struggled to keep her feet moving. One look at the concern on Spencer’s face, and she knew he worried for her. “It’s nothing really. Myles saw someone from his past walk into the ballroom and froze. I bumped into him and we tumbled down. End of story.”
Time for her to change the topic of their conversation. “Has either of your sisters received any marriage proposals this season?” Bella would be surprised if they hadn’t. Both girls were lovely. Mary, quiet and somewhat shy. Elizabeth, well, she reminded Bella of herself. Outspoken and opinionated. Bella was convinced there was the right gentleman out there for Elizabeth.
“No,” Spencer replied. “And I must admit I’m worried. Not about finding a suitable husband for Mary, but for Elizabeth. You know how she can be? I think most of the young gentlemen, right out of University, are afraid of her. I believe she needs a little older, more seasoned man who can appreciate her attributes.”
“What about Lord Amesbury, or my brother, Sebastian?” Bella suggested. Playing matchmaker might take her mind off her own pathetic life.
“I believe Lord Sebastian is already spoken for, if Myles’s sister, Lady Marissa, has anything to say about it.” Spencer paused and looked from left to right, scanning the room for available gentlemen. “Lord Amesbury might be a good match for Mary—Elizabeth—I don’t believe so. Although, I could be wrong as they are dancing together now and appear quite taken with one another.”
Bella strained her neck looking for them. Finally she glimpsed the waltzing couple over on the left side of the dance floor. They did seem engrossed in a deep conversation. Not a serious one, as both Amesbury and Elizabeth smiled often. Amesbury did not smile much, as far as Bella’s recollection could recall. “They do make a lovely couple. Has Amesbury called on her?” Bella could breathe freely now that the pain in her heart eased somewhat. Placing her attention on others helped.
***
Spencer didn’t know how to answer. He didn’t want to appear a negligent brother, but truth be told, he disappeared every afternoon so he wouldn’t have to deal with potential suitors. He left the job to his grandmother. If a gentleman didn’t meet with her approval, they would know it. She would have him escorted out the door promptly. Would Amesbury meet his grandmother’s strict list of attributes a suitor must possess? Spencer believed so. “My grandmother oversees the callers in the afternoon. I’d rather not get involved until one comes to me with an offer. So to answer your question, I’m embarrassed to say I don’t know. Perhaps I should inquire. It would be an honor to have Amesbury in the family.”
“Do you know why Lady Beth’s father broke off her engagement with Amesbury and what illness plagued him?” Bella queried.
Two years past, Amesbury had come down with a mysterious illness and his betrothal to Lady Elizabeth Duncan was called off. Spencer often wondered about what happened. The illness was a well guarded secret as was the broken engagement. Personally, he thought Lady Beth and Amesbury did not suit. They were both rather quiet and Lady Beth was also painfully shy. He imagined their conversations were rather dull in nature. Now seeing Amesbury with his sister, Elizabeth, she brought out the man hidden inside. He appeared to be enjoying himself immensely.
“I’m sorry to say, once again, I cannot answer you,” Spencer said, puzzled about all the secrecy. “Rumors were he took a lover and Lady Beth’s father was appalled. I don’t believe it to be truthful. Lady Beth’s father has several mistresses. I believe she became tired of waiting for him to show her any kind of affection. She might have panicked, afraid her married life to him would be cold and lonely. Some people still hold out for the ever elusive love.”
Bella frowned. “Why do you call love elusive? Surely you believe in love. Look at my family. The duke and duchess are in love. Lord Bridgeton and Amelia are the perfect example of a couple in love. He is your cousin, don’t you agree?”
Oh, Spencer agreed wholeheartedly. Bridgeton and Amelia loved one other. And if his cousin could find the kind of love that withstood gossip, tragic deaths, attempted murder and prison, why couldn’t he? He had none of those demons haunting him.
Spencer believed himself in love with the woman dancing within the confines of his arms.
But how did one know?
Love could be fleeting.
When true love stole ones heart, how did one recognize it?
Perhaps one did and perhaps one did not. How sad to think of true love passing over someone because they were not paying attention. Spencer had never paid much attention to the emotions he felt with a woman, until he met Lady Isabella Seabrook.
When in Bella’s company, he paid close attention to his heart, mind and soul, which was not a wise thing. He needed to observe her and see if she reciprocated any of those feelings toward him. Some days he thought so. Others he did not. Of course, it could all be an act on her part. They had made that silly arrangement. Spencer had hoped, in time, he would steal her heart from Myles. He didn’t think he’d succeeded thus far. He could still try. Anyone could see something had transpired between her and Myles on the dance floor. Something catastrophic. It gave him hope. He only hoped it wasn’t false hope.
The next time Spencer managed to get her alone he would kiss her. One could never tell about these sorts of things until some intimacy was reached. If he kissed her and felt nothing, well then, he’d have his answer. Please do not let me feel nothing. Earlier he noticed she appeared taken with Mr. Bradford. Maybe he would be the gentleman of her affections. The sudden heaviness in his chest could not be ignored.
“Spencer,” Bella said as the music concluded, pulling him out of his introspect. “If you please, would you escort me back to my mother?”
Spencer did as she requested and left the ballroom in search of something strong to drink.
***
Bella once again took a seat beside her mother. This time she hoped the men on her dance card didn’t find her. She’d enjoyed her waltz with Spencer as she always did, although, something appeared different with him. Most of the time he’d appeared lost in thought. His face took on a faraway look. One minute he’d scowl and the next smile. He’d never behaved in a similar way with her before and it puzzled her. She hoped he wasn’t coming down with something?
She did enjoy seeing her brother, Sebastian and Marissa dancing. Marissa and she had much in common. Both loved men since they were young girls. Bella wished with all her heart that Marissa had better luck with Sebastian than she did with Myles. One quick glance at Amesbury and Elizabeth confirmed her suspicions. They were taken with each other. Amesbury deserved to love and be loved. Tragedy had befallen his family several years ago. A carriage accident left his parents and only sister dead. The light went out of Amesbury’s eyes that day. Seeing some of the light come back into them made Bella smile, even as the light was being extinguished from hers. Would tonight ever end?
***
“Coward,” Myles chastised himself. “You’re a coward. Go out there and find out why Sophie is here.” Taking several deep breaths, Myles entered the ballroom after his uncomfortable conversation with Bella. The hurt he witnessed in her eyes would forever plague him. Bloody hell, he was a ghastly man for causing her so much pain and anguish. He hoped in time he could make it up to her.
Wentworth didn’t seem pleased with him either. Why would he, when Myles broke his sister’s heart? He wasn’t even all that thrilled with himself. How could he have been so careless with Bella’s affections? At thirty-years-old he should’ve known better. But ever since his time in America, he’d been confused and not knowing his own heart. He had planned on marrying Bella before he left on that fateful trip across the Atlantic. Since then, he’d been torn with remorse when it came to her. Bloody hell, he deserved her scorn and more.
His eyes scanned around for Sophie, all the while ignoring the whispers. Sophie and his cousin, Gerard, stood extremely close together over by the refreshment table. Myles’s long legs ate up the distance as his pulse hummed inside his body, and his fingers itched to curl themselves around Gerard’s throat.
“Cousin, welcome home. How were your travels to America?” It took all Myles’s focus to force a good-natured smile and not act on his previous thoughts.
“Norwich.” Gerard nodded his head. “My travels proved fruitful. I would like to present you to my wife, Sophie. We met on the ship crossing the Atlantic and married once we arrived in England. “My dear Sophie, you remember my cousin, Lord Norwich.”
Wife—married—wife. Myles did not understand. Sophie had married a Frenchman. How could she be married to his cousin?
“Lord Norwich,” Sophie curtsied and extended her hand, which Myles somehow managed to take without hesitation. “It is a pleasure to see you again. Gerard and I speak of you often.”
“Myles bowed over her hand and looked into her eyes, seeking answers. The brown, innocent eyes he remembered so well were gone and replaced with cold, dark ones. He shivered. “It’s my pleasure to welcome you into the family.” What happened to the young, innocent Sophie he remembered?
“Have you spoken to your father recently?” Gerard interjected.
“Not since the day before yesterday,” Myles answered, puzzled by the turn of the conversation to his father.
“I sent a note explaining my marriage and how I could not live in my bachelor quarters any longer. I asked if Sophie and I could reside temporarily at Norwich Mansion. I recently purchased a home, but it needs extensive renovations. He has agreed.”
Myles’s heart stopped. He could not possibly have heard Gerard correctly. They were going to live with his family? Myles did not think he would survive seeing Sophie every day. No, not days, years, because renovations could take years to complete.
“Well now, this is a surprise.” Myles hoped his voice didn’t give away his true feelings. “How nice to have you both staying with us. Mother will be pleased. If you’ll excuse me, I believe I owe a young lady a dance.”
Myles owed no one a dance. But he didn’t think he could spend another minute in their company as anger simmered inside him. What happened to her? The woman who married his cousin was a stranger. Nothing of the Sophie he’d thought he loved existed anymore. How could he have been so mistaken? He realized now that he’d been obsessed with a person who didn’t really exist. And obsession had nothing to do with love, real love. He had fabricated the perfect woman in his mind, believing her to be Sophie when the perfect woman was right before his eyes all this time. Bella.
“Bella,” he whispered, beautiful, sweet, outspoken Bella. What a terrible mistake he’d made. What a bloody arse he was. After his actions and the words he’d said to her tonight, he deserved the punishment of having Sophie and Gerard live with his family.
***
Inside the quiet calm of her bed chamber later that evening, Bella lay beneath the covers, her eyes wide open. As exhausted as her mind and body were, sleep eluded her. Three gentlemen’s faces and voices plagued her every thought, making sleep impossible, again. Three Seasons ago she met Mr. Stuart Spencer for the first time and barely gave him a passing thought. She had had eyes for Myles alone. That was not to say she did not notice Spencer. Hard not to when she danced with him often enough, and he entertained her with his charming wit. She truly enjoyed his company. In many ways he was like Myles. Perhaps that was what drew her to him in the first place.
After her waltz with Spencer, he escorted her back to her mother and she thought he’d acted odd. Why had all the gentlemen acted strange during the evening? First Myles, then Spencer. Had Spencer too, fallen in love with a mysterious woman? Bella’s heart lay heavy inside her chest. Had she lost all the men who once sought out her favors?
Mr. Bradford. She knew practically nothing about him, but one look into his eyes and she witnessed the guarded look. He had a past, one she wanted to know about. He hinted at things. But what things? Horrible things? Was he running from the authorities in America? Sometimes her mind would not stop, and it frustrated her to no end.
Bella wanted her sister, Amelia. Talking about her feelings with her sister always helped. But she and Bridgeton lived in his family home. The only other one in the house she could confide her confused feelings to was Emma. At this late hour, she would never dare disturb Emma and Wentworth in their private chambers. It wasn’t out of fear for her brother, more out of respect for their private marriage time together. They deserved it after all they’d been through.
Should she seek out Sebastian? No, goodness, no. Oh dear, she was alone with her racing thoughts. Not until the sun peeked through the window curtains did Bella’s muscles finally relax, her heart slow and the lids of her eyes shut, allowing her some much desired rest.
Chapter Seven
Bella, feeling refreshed even though she slept little, descended the main elegant staircase the following morning. At the base her eyes came to rest on three enormous, deep red rose bouquets in crystal vases sitting on the mahogany hall table.
“Wonderful,” Wentworth grumbled as he came down the stairs right after her and sneezed. “Will this Season never end? I cannot take another torturous day with my allergies. Who started this tradition of sending ladies flowers? I presume these gentlemen will call upon you this afternoon. Once they leave, have these flowers moved to your chambers. I’ve suffered enough trying to marry my sisters off.”
“Wentworth.” Bella laughed. “Be honest, when I’m married and living with my husband, you will miss me.”
Her brother frowned, his eyes watered and he sneezed. “I’ll never admit to such a thing. Is Amelia coming for afternoon tea?”
Bella could tell he missed Amelia almost as much as she did. “Yes. I told her she must even before I received these lovely flowers.” She paused, leaned down and inhaled the fragrant blooms. “They smell divine.” Bella read the cards. “We should expect Mr. Spencer and Mr. Bradford for tea.” She picked up the third vase of roses and gave them to the first servant she saw, an upstairs maid. “Take these to your quarters and enjoy them.”
“Who were they from?” Wentworth’s brow rose in silent question.
“Whom do you think? What person need beg my forgiveness? Forgiveness I might never grant.” The thought of never forgiving Myles twisted her stomach up tight. She experienced a moment’s guilt for carelessly disregarding his flowers. Flowers she admitted were beautiful.
“Please excuse me, dear sister, I believe a visit to the giver of those roses you gave away is necessary. Will you please extend my apologies to Emma for running out before breakfast? I’ll return before afternoon tea.”
As she watched her brother leave with concern spread across his features, she wondered if he was worried because Myles sent her flowers or because of the American lady. Which brought to the forefront of her mind what secrets Wentworth and Myles hid regarding this Sophie woman. By the strange way her brother reacted last evening to the news of Myles’s lady love from America arriving in London, she was convinced they were hiding something. And why was Sophie here if Myles said she was married?
Bella had tried to ignore the change in Myles and make excuses for his behavior. After what transpired last evening, she had to come to terms with the fact he didn’t love her. As much as his honesty broke her heart, she had to accept it. She would lock away the love she had for him in a safe place and go on with her life. What choice did she have? She refused to wallow in self-pity. Refused to become a burden to her family because of a broken heart.
People sometimes referred to her as strong minded. Now would be a good time to use the attribute.
The time had come for her to give attention to her other gentlemen callers, mainly Spencer and Mr. Bradford. Myles could no longer take up her whole heart. She needed to free up space for someone else.
Her heart cried out in pain. A pain she would learn to live with, minute by minute, day by day. After taking a deep inhale of the fragrant roses, she entered the bright yellow breakfast room. Empty. Was everyone in her family sleeping in after last evening’s ball?
***
“You look awful,” Wentworth said as he was shown into his friend’s study. Myles still wore his previous evenings clothing. Although one would have to look closely to make the distinction. His cravat was missing, and the buttons to his waistcoat and shirt were partly undone. His face was drawn with tension, and he looked as though he hadn’t slept in days.
“Thanks,” Myles said as he drained the contents of his crystal glass and began pacing the room. “I’ve had better days and nights. Last night, well...It didn’t go as planned.”
“As planned? I would say not. You managed to make enemies of my wife, Bella and Amelia. Bella gave your flowers to a maid. I don’t think she will forgive you anytime soon.” Wentworth rubbed his chin and glared at one of his best friends, the other being Amesbury. “As far as my forgiving you for breaking my sister’s heart, I’ll think on it. In the meantime, I’ll continue to be your friend. As you look like you need one right now.”
