Summer Days, page 7
“Do you miss it?” Tracy asked. “Traveling that much?”
“Not that kind of traveling. Living out of a backpack and weeks, months, on the road? No. I like to take more relaxing vacations now. Like this. Pick a place. Rent out a house or an apartment and just spend a few weeks in a city or a town exploring. Getting a real for the place. That’s something you can’t do in a weekend or a week even.”
“That’s just about the only thing I regret about owning a bar. I love it here. Don’t get me wrong. But this is always going to be my home, and for the most part, I’m happy with that, but I can’t ever see myself leaving for more than a week or two at a time. I wouldn’t want to put that pressure on Molly and Breanna to keep things going.”
A shiver ran up Hannah’s spine, and she covered up her reaction by taking a drink. This felt like a deep conversation. And Hannah really hoped that she wasn’t reaching here. That this wasn’t entirely innocent.
Because it felt like they were sharing things that would either open the door to something potentially happening between or swiftly shut it, depending on how they answered.
Was Tracy telling her that she’d never travel in case that would turn her off? Was that why Tracy had asked her if she missed it?
They both turned when they heard a few gasps. Flames had leapt out of the barbecue on the other side of the deck, and Hannah pushed herself out of the chair, crossing the wooden planks without thinking about it, her wine left on the table that had been beside them.
“Shit,” Breanna muttered to herself as she stood back as more flames rose up, charring whatever piece of meat had been on the grill. It was beyond recognition now. “Everything’s fine,” she called out to everyone behind her. “It’s under control!”
“You want a hand?” Hannah asked.
“I’m so bad at this. A friend of ours who’s not here tonight usually takes over the barbecue. I’ve never had to do more than hamburgers for the two of us. I think I lost a few wings,” she said, carefully peering down into the bottom of the barbecue beyond the grates. “And that stoked the flames, I guess. You sure you don’t mind?”
“No. Not at all.” Hannah held out her hand, and Breanna gave her the tongs. “This is actually my favorite kind of cooking, and I rarely get to do it. City living,” she added, when Breanna looked confused.
“You’re a life saver.” Breanna squeezed her shoulder before going back inside and coming out with two plates of burgers and chicken pieces.
Hannah quickly fell into a rhythm alongside Breanna who gave her fresh plates and dished out the food while Hannah kept the grilling under control. It wasn’t long before Hannah sat down with a burger and some wings, taking her seat beside Tracy once again, and Hannah was certain of it this time.
There was something in Tracy’s gaze tonight, and Hannah had every intention of finding out if she was right.
16
Tracy only realized how tipsy she was, when she’d been caught staring at Hannah for probably the third time, so she’d stopped drinking after they’d had dinner, and Tracy spent the rest of the night guarding her feelings, second guessing herself.
Now, they were walking home, side by side, the ocean getting louder the closer they got.
“That was impressive,” Tracy said. “Taking over the barbecue like that. Breanna’s normally pretty reliable in high pressure situations.”
“Cooking for that many people at once is overwhelming, especially when you’re not used to manning the grill. She said someone else normally does it.”
“Yeah. Paula loves barbecuing.”
“What’s actually very impressive,” Hannah said as their hands briefly touched, “Is you designing Breanna’s tattoo. I had no idea.”
Tracy smiled, a chuckle bubbling up. “I didn’t either.”
“What?” Hannah asked with a laugh.
A light breeze lifted Tracy’s hair away from her face as they turned onto their street, the sea air a familiar greeting. “She asked me for some drawings of a koi fish, and we were in the middle of ramping up our marketing material. I thought she was thinking of flyers or a new sign outside or something. She just said she wanted some sketches. And two weeks later, there it is. On her arm.”
“That’s crazy.”
“Breanna’s like that. She’s spontaneous. She goes on her gut feeling and asks questions later.”
“I wish I was more like that.”
“Yeah?” Tracy turned to look at her as they reached their houses. “Do you want to sit out on the deck and have a night cap?”
“Sure.”
Tracy led them through the side gate and out to the deck. “Have a seat.” She unlocked the sliding doors and went inside, flicking on lights, her heart racing. This was a bad idea. She should have just said goodnight, but they were in the middle of a conversation, and Tracy didn’t want the night to end there.
She’d been disappointed earlier when Hannah had ended up in charge of the grill, and when she returned, she’d struck up a conversation with Molly, and Tracy had hardly spoken to her for the rest of the night.
She pulled open the refrigerator door and found a bottle of white wine, pouring out two glasses, checking her reflection in the mirror hanging above the electric fire before stepping back outside.
Hannah was standing at the edge of the deck, looking out at the ocean, the moon casting a soft glow on the water.
“Thanks,” Hannah said when Tracy came to stand beside her, handing Hannah a glass. “Cheers.”
“Cheers,” Tracy echoed, a nervous energy running through her as she took a sip. “So, you want to be more like Breanna? I would have said that you were that kind of person already. Following your instincts.”
Hannah turned to face her, her arm resting on the railing, her fingers casually sliding up and down the stem of her wine glass. “What makes you say that?”
“Not that many people would have figured out how to stay doing what they love, you know? They would have stuck at their jobs or moved to another one if they didn’t like it. But you veered away from that. Did your own thing. That requires a certain amount of confidence, doesn’t it? Of following your gut?”
Hannah exhaled, a hint of a smile on her lips. “Maybe, but I could certainly use it in other areas of my life.”
“What would you do differently?” Tracy asked, her pulse swishing in her ears, and for a second, she felt like she was floating, memories of ten years ago coming back and intertwining with the present moment.
When Hannah’s gaze met hers, Tracy’s heart stalled. Hannah lifted her hand to gently brush Tracy’s hair behind her ear, sending a shiver of desire through her entire body.
Hannah’s eyes searched her own. “You are so beautiful.”
Tracy’s lips curved into a smile, a warmth spreading through her. “I feel like I’m having a déjà vu moment,” she murmured, her eyes locked onto Hannah’s.
“What do you mean?”
“You really don’t remember, do you?”
“Tell me,” Hannah said in just above a whisper.
Tracy told her how during their walk home, when she’d slid a steadying arm around Hannah’s back that she’d turned towards her, making them stop, and told her those exact words.
Hannah’s hand lightly rested on Tracy’s arm, sliding down to loosely hold her hand. “And if I hadn’t been so drunk? Would anything have happened between us?”
Tracy inhaled a sharp breath. “I was still technically with Kris.”
“Who was cheating on you.”
“Yes. And I was tempted,” Tracy confessed. “But you were so young.”
“And now?” Hannah’s thumb lazily drew a pattern across Tracy’s wrist as she spoke. “Is thirty-one too young?”
“No, but I feel like forty-five is too old.” Tracy swallowed down the lump in her throat. Would she ever stop being so sensible? Was she really going to ruin this moment, this night, worrying about their age difference?
“I don’t.”
Tracy smiled. “The younger person is always going to say that.” A tingling started in the pit of her stomach as Hannah’s eyes never left her own.
“Did you have fun tonight?”
“Of course, I did.” Tracy closed her eyes for a second, this thing between them suddenly overwhelming. “Yes. I had fun.”
“And did you think I was too young to be there tonight? With your friends, who as far as I can see were all in their forties.”
Tracy arched an eyebrow. “Molly wouldn’t be happy with that assumption. She’s thirty-six.”
“You’re avoiding my question.”
Tracy bit her lip for a second. “No. You fit right in. In fact, I think I was almost jealous. You fit in a little too well, and I was hoping to have you all to myself tonight.” The words tumbled out of her mouth before she even realized what she was saying or implying.
Hannah’s gorgeous lips slid into an easy smile. “Something’s different tonight. With you. Us.”
Tracy nodded, looking down at their hands as Hannah tilted her wrist so that they could interlace their fingers, and Tracy’s heart jolted at the feeling of Hannah’s fingers sliding across her own.
“How have ten years gone by?” Hannah asked, her voice low, soft almost. “In some ways, nothing has changed. In others, it’s entirely different.”
Tracy met Hannah’s honey brown eyes. “What hasn’t changed?”
“How much I want you.” Hannah’s gaze was bold and confident. “I’ve thought about you so many times over the years. But being back here, it’s impossible to ignore, and I can safely say that what I’d always dismissed as a crush is so much more than that.”
Tracy’s heart thumped erratically as Hannah’s words sunk in. “You’re right.”
“About what?”
“About tonight. Something is different.”
Hannah’s eyes flickered down to Tracy’s lips, a gentle breeze moving Hannah’s blond hair away from her face. “I’ve wanted to kiss you for the last ten years.”
Tracy’s fingers ached, a passionate fluttering building inside her.
This was the part where she gave up trying to be sensible.
This was when she gave into this growing attraction between them.
17
Hannah’s words hung in the night air. “I’ve wanted to kiss you for the last ten years.” It was the truth, and Hannah just had to hope that Tracy felt the same way.
A light breeze moved through her hair, her hand still holding Tracy’s, as Hannah waited for her to say something. In reality, only two or three seconds had passed, but to Hannah, it felt like a lifetime.
But Tracy never said anything.
Instead, her eyes fluttered closed, her other hand resting on Hannah’s hip as Tracy closed the gap between them, and Hannah sighed into the kiss, a hot ache growing deep inside her as their lips finally met in a slow, surprisingly gentle kiss.
Hannah melted in to her as she parted her lips, a chill running through her as Tracy’s hand left her hip and slid behind Hannah’s neck, keeping her close as they deepened the kiss, and Hannah could have sworn the grounded shifted beneath her when Tracy’s tongue skimmed across her own.
A tiny groan escaped Hannah’s lips, her hand slipping underneath the blue fabric of Tracy’s top and sliding over her warm hip, causing Tracy to sway into her, a delicious moan leaving her lips.
Hannah’s pulse tripped at the feeling of Tracy’s body pressed against her own. Everything fell away. The roar of the ocean. All the second guessing about whether she could ever have a chance with Tracy. All that existed was this moment, and the way their lips seemed to fit together so perfectly.
Hannah could taste the sweetness of the wine on Tracy’s lips, but neither of them were drunk. If they ended up in Tracy’s bedroom, it would be a conscious decision, and Hannah’s pulse pounded as an image of Tracy standing in front of her in white lingerie flashed across her mind.
Tracy’s hand left Hannah’s neck, sliding up into her hair, and Hannah lost herself in the kiss, in the moment, a breathy gasp escaping Tracy’s lips as their tongues explored, as they finally gave into this.
Hannah had no way of knowing how much time had passed or who even pulled away, but they eventually came up for air, and the desire in Tracy’s eyes had Hannah’s heart thumping wildly against her ribs. There was only one way this night was going to end.
Tracy’s fingers left Hannah’s hair, her hand resting on Hannah’s shoulder. She looked like she was about to say something, but then she tilted her head, closing the gap between them to recapture Hannah’s lips, taking her breath away.
Hannah moaned into the kiss. Tracy’s lips were more insistent, her kisses harder, and Hannah gripped Tracy’s hip to steady herself, her knees weak.
When Tracy pulled away to meet Hannah’s eyes, her voice was husky. “I know what I want to do. To ask you. But I’ve never been one to just jump into things like this.”
Hannah nodded, her hand leaving Tracy’s hip to caress her arm, her eyes searching Tracy’s. “I’m not either, but for me, this is different. I’ve wanted this for so long. So, ask me.” Hannah swallowed down the lump in her throat.
Tracy’s eyes never left hers. “Come to bed with me.”
Hannah felt those words in every cell of her body, and she was almost afraid to speak. She didn’t trust her voice. She simply nodded, and Tracy led her inside and up the stairs.
18
Tracy pushed open her bedroom door, the blinds and windows open, letting in the melodic swoosh of the waves hitting the shoreline. The moonlight managed to illuminate the room, so Tracy didn’t bother with any lights.
She wondered if Hannah could hear her heart beating, because as they climbed the stairs, Tracy couldn’t remember the last time she was this nervous.
It might have been the fact that it had been almost three years since she’d been with someone. It could have been the idea that she’d never slept with someone so much younger than her.
It definitely had something to do with the fact that this afternoon, Tracy never could have imagined this happening. This was easily the most spontaneous she’d been in a very long time.
“Come here,” Hannah murmured, giving her hand a tug as she moved past Tracy, towards the bed, and Tracy let herself step into Hannah’s space.
Hannah’s hand was on her waist, the other cupping her cheek, her thumb lazily swiping along her bottom lip as she searched Tracy’s eyes. “Are you nervous?” Hannah whispered.
Tracy nodded. “Can you tell?” she asked with a half-smile.
“No. But I was so…” Hannah’s hand fell away from Tracy’s cheek. “I thought I’d see if I was the only one.”
“Not at all.” Tracy swallowed. “Let’s take it slow.” She lifted her hand to tuck Hannah’s hair behind her ear. She leaned in, brushing her lips across Hannah’s, her hand resting on Hannah’s neck as they deepened the kiss.
Hannah’s lips were soft and warm. Addictive. And Tracy suppressed a shudder when Hannah’s tongue met her own, sending a delicious shiver of desire through her entire body, all the way to her fingertips.
Tracy was the first to pull away, her heart swelling as she met Hannah’s eyes. “I know you like to tell me, but I want you to know that I think you’re beautiful too.” That earned a bit of a smirk from Hannah. Her cheeks might even have darkened slightly. “Stunning, in fact.”
Hannah inhaled a shaky breath as her smirk turned into a smile. “Thank you. And I wish I could remember that night. It sounded like a memorable one.”
“We’re going to forget about that night. I shouldn’t have left you out there like that. And I shouldn’t have dismissed your advances. Drunk or not. I could have let you stay here and talked to you about it the next day, like an adult.” Tracy shook her head. “Anyway, I think we should focus on tonight. On new memories.”
“I can get onboard with that,” Hannah whispered, already closing the distance between them, her fingers sliding into Tracy’s hair, her nails lightly raking against Tracy’s scalp as they lost themselves in the kiss.
Tracy had no control over the groan that left her throat when Hannah’s tongue danced with her own, and suddenly it looked like neither of them wanted to take this slow.
The thermostat had been turned up, and Tracy broke the kiss, her eyes searching Hannah’s. “Are you sure?” Tracy asked.
There was a blaze in Hannah’s gaze. “I’ve never wanted anything more.”
Tracy gripped Hannah’s top, grabbing a fistful of it and tugging her close, kissing her passionately, her other hand roaming down Hannah’s back and over her navy shorts to clutch her ass, eliciting a low moan that Tracy could feel at her core.
They stood beside the bed, lost in each other, in the most electrifying kisses that Tracy had ever experienced, until Hannah’s hands moved to the hem of Tracy’s top, lifting it up, and forcing them to break the kiss.
Hannah sucked in a breath as her gaze swept over Tracy who stood in her white shorts and a white bra, her hair falling across the straps, and Tracy’s breath stilled as she processed Hannah’s reaction. Curiosity? Disappointment? It was impossible to tell. Until Hannah’s eyes lifted to meet her own, dark with desire, and Hannah’s arms encircled her as their lips met again and again.
Tracy’s skin prickled as the heat of Hannah’s hands roaming over her body conflicted with the cool breeze that drifted in from outside. Tracy’s own hands explored, moving underneath Hannah’s tank top, over her hip and around to her back.
Tracy’s hands pushed underneath the waistband of Hannah’s shorts, sliding beneath the fabric of her smooth underwear to clutch her ass, causing a guttural moan to leave Hannah’s lips.
“Fuck,” Hannah panted as she broke the kiss, their foreheads pressed together as they both caught their breath. “You’re driving me crazy.”
Tracy slowly removed her hands, holding onto Hannah’s hips for a moment before lifting her top over her head, a low throb starting somewhere in her belly at the sight of Hannah’s tanned skin against her white bra, her blond hair cascading over her shoulders.
