Here Be Monsters, page 14
“Bubble bath, as soon as I get home,” Buffy promised. She took her mother’s hand in hers, squeezed hard. “We did it, Mom. We won. We can go home.”
“You did it, you mean,” answered her mother. She squeezed back. “I suppose that means you want me to get up now.”
“Unless you’d like to stay here for a while.”
“Not likely,” Joyce said.
Slowly, the two got to their feet.
“I feel like I have a bad hangover,” Joyce said.
“As opposed to a good one?” Buffy asked. She linked her arm with her mother’s. Together they crossed the kitchen, heading for the living room.
Joyce turned her head from side to side, her expression bemused as she took in the floral wallpaper.
“Who on earth lives here?” she asked.
“No one you want to know,” Buffy said, wondering where Nemesis was, when was the trial officially over?
She glanced down at their feet, helping to guide her mom’s still shaky footsteps down the short flight of steps that led to the sunken living room.
“It’s just through here, then across the—”
“Buffy,” her mother said. It was not the tone of voice that went with her happy face.
Buffy’s head shot up. She stopped dead in her tracks.
On the far side of the living room, a figure was stretched on one of the uncomfortable sofas. Its feet were tied over the arms of the sofa to one set of wooden legs, its hands to the other.
As Buffy watched, the figure slowly raised its head. Its features were pale and waxy. Even from across the room, Buffy could see the slight trail of blood that ran down one side of its neck.
“Suz?”
“Buffy—” Suz rasped. “I thought—”
“She thought she had it all figured out,” a voice behind Buffy said.
She pivoted swiftly, pulling her mother around behind her.
“The same way you do,” Zahalia Walker said. “But I wouldn’t be too sure about anything, if I were you. You’re not leaving here until I finish with you first.”
CHAPTER 15
“Wait a minute!” Xander said. “I think you were supposed to turn right.”
“Stop back-seat driving,” Giles snapped. He executed as smart a U-turn as his car would allow, passing Oz’s van, which was following along behind him. A squeal of brakes indicated Oz had turned too.
“I’m not sitting in back,” Xander countered. “I’m sitting in front, next to you. In America, we call this the passenger side.”
“Will you stop nattering on and let me concentrate?” Giles inquired. “I don’t know this part of town very well.”
“A point even I can see is obvious—Hey!” Xander yelled as the Citroën’s own tires squealed around a corner. “You were supposed to take a left there, Giles!”
“I distinctly recall you telling me it was a right turn.”
“That was when we were going in the opposite direction.”
“Oh, bloody hell.”
* * *
Buffy put her hands on her hips and faced the vampire mother.
“What is your problem?” she demanded. “Don’t you know when to quit? You asked for the trial. You got one. You lost. I won. I get to take my mother out of here. Fade to black. End of story. And nobody said you got to snack on my friends.”
“There have been some revisions,” said Zahalia Walker. “Nobody kills my boys and walks away, including you, Slayer. Nemesis or no Nemesis. You passed the trial, but you won’t get past me.”
“We’ll just see about that,” Buffy said. “Mom. Go. Now.”
“I’m not—” Joyce Summers started.
“Just do it!” the Slayer shouted. Then she lowered her head and ran straight at Zahalia Walker.
The mother vampire gave a grunt as Buffy’s head rammed into her stomach. She fell back, her hands scrabbling for purchase on Buffy’s shoulders. The Slayer let the vampire’s momentum pull them both down, then kept on rolling. She somersaulted over Vamp Mama’s head, then vaulted to her feet and spun around. Zahalia Walker was still getting to her feet.
The trial’s over. Mama Vamp is fair game. So where’s a good stake when I really need one?
“I’m going to kill you,” Mrs. Walker taunted as she got to her feet. “I’m going to kill you and I’m going to make your mother watch. Just like I had to watch you kill my Webster. Then I’m going to make your mother one of us. It’s so hard to find a good bridge partner in this day and age.”
“You’re not getting anywhere near her,” Buffy said.
“Try and stop me.”
Almost before the vampire mother had finished speaking, Buffy was in motion. She leaped forward with a roundhouse kick that sent the vampire crashing sideways. She followed it up with a kick to the chest. The vampire mother smacked up against the wall. One of her fat fists shot out, catching Buffy full in the face. The Slayer staggered back.
Ow.
“If I need a nose job, you’re paying for it.”
Zahalia Walker laughed. “By the time I’m finished with you, Slayer, you won’t care about your nose. You won’t have a face anymore.”
Buffy caught a quick glimpse of motion from the corner of her eye. Her mother had Suz’s arms untied and was working on her legs.
Way to go, Mom.
The vampire mother began to ease toward Joyce and Suz. Buffy shifted to block her. She had to keep herself between them at all costs.
That thing’s not getting my mother.
“Why don’t you just attack me, Slayer?” Zahalia Walker asked. “Could it be that you’re getting tired? I can keep on going all night. I’ve got forever. But not you. You’re mortal.”
“Not to mention bored to tears,” Buffy said.
Why do I always get the chatty vampires?
But much as she hated to admit it, Vamp Mama was right. Buffy was mortal. And she was tired. Her arms felt heavy. Her legs, wobbly.
“And just what is that disgusting substance you’re tracking all over my beautiful carpet?” continued the vampire mother. “What were you, raised in a barn or something? I’m going to have to have a talk with your mother. Before I drink her blood, of course.”
Buffy cast another quick glance over her shoulder at her mother. Suz’s legs were free now, too. Joyce was rubbing them, trying to get the circulation going. Slowly, Buffy began to edge to one side of the living room, aiming for a small table that stood against the wall.
Suz and Joyce were on their feet now, moving toward the hall.
“You don’t actually think I’m going to let them get away, do you?” asked the vampire mother.
Now or never, Buffy thought.
She leaped for the table just as the vampire mother hurled herself toward her. She hit Buffy full on. Together, the two crashed down against the table, sending pieces flying. Buffy smacked against the wall, then slid down. She could feel sharp pieces of wood jabbing into her back as she landed on the floor, the wind knocked out of her.
Don’t stake yourself, you idiot! The vampire! The vampire!
Buffy had lots of wood now. The trouble would be getting them into action. First, she had to get her breath back. And then she had to get the vampire off of her.
Zahalia Walker had her hands in Buffy’s hair. She lifted the Slayer’s head, then slammed it back against the floor. Once. Twice.
“Those are for Webster and Percy,” said the vampire mother. She slammed Buffy’s head down a third time, then jerked it to one side. The Slayer could feel her pulse beating like a wild thing. She tried to buck, but Zahalia Walker’s immense frame had her pinned down.
“And this,” she said, bringing her face close as her jaws opened. “This one is for me.”
“I beg your pardon.” Through eyes that still saw stars, Buffy saw a hand tap the vampire mother on the shoulder. “Excuse me,” the familiar voice went on. “I’m so sorry to be a bother.”
With a snarl, Zahalia Walker turned around. Apparently, even her instinct to kill was no match for all those years of proper etiquette.
“What?” she snarled.
“This,” said Joyce Summers.
A moment later, Buffy found herself lying in a pile of vampire dust. Suz Tompkins stood above her, a table leg clenched in one fist, the jagged end pointing down at Buffy.
“That was for Leila and Heidi.”
“Well done,” said the voice of the Balancer.
“About time you showed up,” Buffy said. “You aren’t by any chance familiar with the concept of fair play, are you?”
She pushed herself into a sitting position, then let Suz pull her to her feet. Buffy felt totally disgusting. The vampire dust was adhering to the spider goo.
She heard a crash from the front hall. Now what?
“This better not be anyone you know,” she told the Balancer.
She watched in astonishment as Angel sprang into the room, Giles and Willow right behind him. Oz was backing Willow up. And Xander was backing up . . . everybody.
Giles skidded to a halt at the sight of Nemesis.
“Ah,” she said, her faces grinning. “This must be the faithful Watcher.”
“The Balancer, I presume?” Giles remarked calmly.
Buffy heard her mother give a snort of laughter.
I did it, Buffy thought. This time, I really have won.
“I think the cavalry just arrived,” Joyce said.
Buffy grinned at her friends. “Hey, guys. Great timing.”
CHAPTER 16
“But I still don’t get why that Nemesis-Balancer-deity-thing didn’t interfere when the vampire mother attacked Buffy,” said Xander. “I mean, that does seem like a pretty clear foul ball.”
It was an hour or so later and all the parties involved in the evening’s events were sitting in the Summers’s kitchen, polishing off enormous bowls of ice cream. Or, all of them except for Angel and Buffy’s mother.
Joyce had pleaded extreme weariness and had gone to bed. And it was just a little too close to sunrise for Angel to feel comfortable hanging out in Buffy’s kitchen consuming cold dairy products.
And then there was the fact that vampires didn’t eat ice cream.
“Actually,” Giles said, as he spooned up the last of his Neopolitan. “I thought Nemesis herself provided a remarkably succinct explanation.”
“Which probably explains why I’m still in the dark,” Xander nodded.
“He’s trying to say it was all my fault,” said Suz Tompkins. At Buffy’s insistence, Suz had accompanied the group to Buffy’s home. She’d needed some first aid, for one thing. Joyce and Giles had supplied it. Plus Buffy had to figure the other girl had a few questions on her mind.
“On the contrary,” Giles countered. “The vampire mother was totally obsessed by her sons. My guess would be she never intended to let Buffy leave unscathed, once she won the trial.”
“The scathing thing,” Willow shuddered. “I hate that part.”
Buffy watched as Suz’s head swiveled back and forth between Willow and Giles.
“I still can’t believe you actually did a scrying spell, Will,” she said. “That’s pretty major stuff.”
“It was,” Willow nodded gingerly. “I know. But I feel okay now. Still four-oh.”
“About Nemesis,” Xander prompted.
“Right,” said Giles. “Well. Letting—” He glanced at Suz, as if uncertain what to call her. “Letting Ms. Tompkins dispatch the vampire mother does have a certain symmetry, you know. After all, it was her sons who . . .” his voice trailed off.
“Killed my friends,” Suz filled in for him.
“Yes,” said Giles. He set his spoon in his empty bowl. “Well. Allowing you to kill the mother completed the circle. The overall conflict, not just between Buffy and Mrs. Walker. Restored balance. Order. I imagine Nemesis was quite satisfied by the larger outcome.”
“Either that or the whole thing was rigged to begin with,” Buffy said.
“Yes,” Giles conceded. “It could be that, also.”
He stood up and carried his bowl to the sink. He rinsed it out, then set it on the drainboard.
“What are you doing?” Buffy said.
“Dishes,” Giles answered. “It’s one of those skills you’ll learn when you’re on your own. Well, I think it’s time to be off. There is actually school tomorrow.”
“I don’t feel so good all of a sudden,” Xander said.
“Ride?” Oz asked Suz. He and Willow got up and took their bowls over to the sink.
“No, thanks,” Suz said shortly. She, too, got to her feet.
“We don’t like, have to do that dish thing, do we?” Xander inquired. “ ’Cause I’m still not quite sure I’ve grasped the basics.”
“Leave it,” Buffy said. She walked her friends to the front door.
“Thanks for the ice cream,” Willow said.
“Yeah,” Xander seconded. “Those frosty calories always hit the spot.”
Oz put his arm around Willow’s shoulder. “Later.”
Together, Oz, Willow and Xander headed down the front walk.
“Yes, well,” Giles said. “Um, good night’s work, I’d say, all in all.” He followed the others, then climbed into his much-treasured Citroën.
“You’re sure you don’t want a ride?” Buffy asked Suz, as the other girl lingered beside her on the porch. “I could ask Giles.”
Together, they watched as Giles started his ancient car. Smoke came out the back.
Suz shook her head. “I’ll get there faster if I walk.” “Giles is not exactly Mister Macho Car Man, I admit. But he’s a pretty good guy.”
“So—” Suz said, as they watched the others drive away. “About tonight . . .”
Here it comes, Buffy thought. “What about it?”
“That thing I killed really was a vampire, wasn’t it?”
“Yes,” Buffy said simply. “It really was.”
“And her sons, they were the ones who killed my friends?”
Buffy nodded.
“You took them down.”
“I dusted them, all right. That’s kind of a special technical term we have for killing vampires.”
“The vampire mother called you something—had some special name for you.”
“The Slayer,” Buffy replied.
“And that’s what—something you do for fun?”
“No,” Buffy replied. “Fun is going to the movies and eating too much buttered popcorn. Being the Slayer is what I am. It’s kind of like my job.”
“And Mister Giles is what—your boss?”
“Sort of more like a supervisor,” Buffy answered.
“And your friends—they know what you are. They even help you.”
Buffy nodded. “It’s part of the whole friend concept.”
Suz looked at her through tired eyes.
“So, I guess we’re not so different after all,” she said. “You have your friends, I have mine.”
Had, Buffy thought. “Well, we definitely have a different tolerance for body piercing.”
Suz smiled.
“I’m sorry about Heidi and Leila,” Buffy said. Now I know how I would feel.
“Yeah, thanks.”
“Are you going to be all right?”
“Sure. Thanks for satisfying my curiosity.”
As if she’d said everything there was to say, Suz started down the steps. Halfway down the front walk she stopped.
“Buffy,” she said, turning back.
“Yeah?”
“Don’t lose your balance.”
“I’ll try not to,” the Slayer said.
She was smiling as she watched the girl in the camouflage jacket disappear into the darkness.
ABOUT THE AUTHOR
Cameron Dokey (yes, her real name, and she does know everything that rhymes with it) is completely delighted to be working for the Slayer. She’s been a fan ever since she watched the Chosen One put an end to Pee Wee Herman in that first feature film. Cameron is also the author of more than twenty novels for young adults, including Love Me, Love Me Not, singled out by the New York Public Library as a Best Book for Teens. She lives in Seattle, Washington, with three cats, one husband, and a collection of more than fifty old sci-fi and horror films.
Visit us at simonandschuster.com/teen
Authors.SimonandSchuster.com/Cameron-Dokey
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