Broken Dove: A Dark Romance (Dance of the Dead Book 2), page 15
And although it was my second time hearing that sound, there was something about it that made it feel familiar.
MISTAKES
I am not labeled by the choices that I have made.
I am more than a few of my mistakes.
Because every single wrong path I’ve taken
Has been a lesson that I’ve gained.
21
SUMMER
“Principessa,” my uncle’s cheery voice greeted me the moment I walked into the dining room.
“Zio!” I yelled as I began to run and throw myself at him until I noticed he wasn’t alone—lately, he never was.
I scrunched my nose, and he laughed.
He said I was jealous, but I didn’t think I was jealous of someone a lot older than me. I was used to being the center of my dad’s attention. Something my mamma used to playfully complain about. After my papà died, my uncle took over all the things my papà would do with me. Though he overcompensated in the affections department.
“You look tan,” he commented as I finished making my way toward him.
My zio Luciano pulled at my hair and winked at me, then nodded so I could turn to say hi to the guy next to him.
Feeling compelled to greet our guest, I turned and forced a smile. His usually blank face seemed amused. His skin was golden no matter the season, and his brown eyes had an intensity to them that I didn’t like.
He greeted me by my first name, and I just stared at him. Family or not, I didn’t trust him.
“Where did your mamma take you?” My uncle pulled me to his lap as he pulled a plate of fruit toward us. I ignored the fruits and reached for the waffles.
My zio didn’t complain about the things I ate, unlike my mamma.
“We went to the beach.” I was excited as I told him about the surprise business trip where my mamma let me tag along. “The water was like my mamma’s eyes.”
“Some cold-ass fucking waters, then.”
“Shh.” My zio shut the stupid jerk up.
I was adding more syrup to my waffles when my mother walked in.
“Annalisa, get over here.” She snapped her fingers while she glared at my uncle.
My face fell, and I tried to get up, but my uncle didn’t let me go.
My head was pounding today. It was becoming more exhausting to run away from all of my mistakes. I couldn’t help but think back on my memories and notice things with a fresh perspective.
Had my mamma known what my zio was capable of, and was that why there was so much hostility between them toward the end? And if she knew, why didn’t she try harder to snap out of the dark hole she fell into after my papà died?
My body was shaking, but I was otherwise proud of myself for not losing it completely after that memory came to the forefront of my mind. My feelings were still slit in two when it came to that man. My fragile mind had a hard time separating the man I remembered before the accident from the man he became afterward.
Or were the memories I had of him nothing but a perfectly crafted illusion he had me believe?
Either outcome brought bile up my throat. I’d trusted him after my papà left me. He was the person who hung the moon and stars for me, and for him to be the first person to visit me in my new world killed me.
I hadn’t lied to Luke when I said my uncle was the one who sold me to that place, but I also hadn’t told him the truth. Zio Luciano was the first who took from me.
Tears spilled onto my arms, and I didn’t realize that I was crying. I felt like I was floating. Instead of a panic attack approaching, there was an odd sense of calmness in me. A stillness that was deadly.
“Are you sure you heard your uncle’s voice?” Luke couldn’t hide the concern in his tone.
“Over the years, I’ve forgotten a lot of things, but his voice is something I can’t escape.”
That was the last time I talked about the ordeal. Luke seemed displeased about the fact that I didn’t want to talk about my uncle but seemed to leave it alone.
“If you tell anyone who you are…I will kill your mother just like I killed your father.”
Even years later, I couldn’t believe he killed my papà. Had the signs been there, too, and I missed them? Now that I was older, I could find the silver lining in my tragedy. The reason why I was able to bury the biggest betrayal in my life was because I didn’t see it happening.
Maybe that was what made him brave. Maybe that was why he took advantage of me because he knew my eyes could not see. Did he stare at my empty eyes while he defiled me? Did he look upon my face and not feel an ounce of remorse while I cried?
My body shook and shivered. I wanted to come out of my skin. I didn’t want to be alone anymore. I didn’t know what time it was; I didn’t even bother to check.
“Come on, boy,” I whispered, hating how broken my voice sounded.
Bear let himself be put on the leash. Once he was secure, I led us out of the room. Things had been okay with Luke since he returned. Just like he said, he stayed home, although he did say he had work to do. I didn’t mind because Eve kept me on my toes.
The house seemed emptier than usual. I was a little disappointed that I could not hear the faint sound of the piano being played. Midnight talks were when I felt closer to Luke.
There was a darkness to him that didn’t make me feel scared. It was in that darkness that I could see his true self, and although some might find it terrifying, I found it comforting.
I was about to turn toward the stairs when I heard a soft humming. Chills went down my spine. I held on to Bear’s leash tighter, and in doing so, I felt a little more at ease. If something was amiss, Bear would have barked, right?
Instead of going up to the second floor, I went back toward the greenhouse, where I was sure the noise was coming from.
As I made my way back, I could almost convince myself I had imagined the humming. Just as I was about to open the door, I heard it again. My heart began to beat erratically, and it made Bear uneasy. I pushed open the doors and felt a current of wind that should not have been there.
I made my way toward the doors to try and investigate if they were open. No one had called out to me, and Bear still seemed to be okay, so I kept going. The moment I got closer to the doors, I knew they were open because I felt a cool breeze caressing my cheeks. When I smelled a hint of lilies in the air, I relaxed.
“Cecilia?”
“Dio mio!” she yelled, and I jumped back.
“I’m sorry for stalking you,” I quickly added.
“It’s fine,” she said, out of breath.
“What are you doing?” I asked. “And what were you singing? It sounded familiar.”
Cecilia was quiet, not answering me. I heard some shuffling, and then Bear growled lowly.
“I’m so sorry, Miss Summer,” she rushed out. “You gave me quite the fright. I dropped the yarn I was working on.”
I took a step forward again. “Do you need any help?”
I might not be able to see, but I could find objects on the floor with ease.
“No, that’s okay. You better go back before you catch a cold. Mr. Luke won’t be pleased if that happened.” The last part was added with a bite I had not heard before from Cecilia.
“Okay.” I absently nodded. “Are you sure you are okay, Cecilia?”
“Yes, I couldn’t sleep, so I figured some fresh air would do me some good.”
That made sense. “Would you like me to keep you company?”
“I think you should go to bed, Miss Summer. It’s quite late.” There was an urgency to her voice that put me on alert.
My throat constricted, and it was difficult to swallow. Why was she being so cold to me?
“Good night, Cecilia.” I managed to choke the words out.
Just as I was about to leave, she spoke again.
“It’s not appropriate for you to be spending so much time with Mr. Luke.”
My chest felt heavy as I walked back out of the greenhouse. Here I thought she liked me. Were her feelings personal, or was it because I was a guest in this house and Luke had given me more than was appropriate? Did she think I was taking advantage of him? Of his generosity?
My body felt cold, and although I didn’t want to go back to my room, I knew that if I got rejected by Luke in this state, I would not be able to handle it. So, I started to make my way back to my room when I heard footsteps coming my way.
Was there more Cecilia wanted to tell me?
Bear was calm. However, I was not. The lack of lilies in the air made me cautious.
“Luke?” I called his name, but the chuckle that followed wasn’t his.
“I’m sorry to disappoint you, Miss Summer.”
Upon hearing Pedro’s voice, my shoulders lost the tension they had been holding.
“I’m sorry, I didn’t expect you to be up at this time,” I told him.
“I was just checking on Cecilia. Making sure she locks up for the night.”
“Right,” I said. I pulled on Bear’s leash so he could begin the trek back to my room. “Well, good night.”
“Couldn’t sleep?” Pedro asked as he began to walk with me.
Maybe it was just my nerves or my dream, but something about this encounter made my skin crawl. I just wanted to be alone—I wanted to feel safe. I regretted going into the greenhouse because that was my happy place, and tonight, it got tainted.
“I’m okay.” I tried to sound relaxed.
“Well, if you need me to watch over you, all you have to do is ask.”
Bear’s leash was burning in my palm from where I was gripping it tightly.
“I’m kidding, Summer,” Pedro teased. “Sweet dreams,” he added in his low, breathy voice.
I mumbled, “You too,” and then closed the door in his face. I didn’t know how long I stayed there, sitting on the edge of the bed, just keeping watch over my door. It seemed like all my demons had come out to play today.
BLISS
If ignorance is bliss, then let me bask in it a little longer.
22
SUMMER
Summer.
My body swayed from side to side.
Summer.
Another gentle shake.
“Summer!”
I was startled awake by someone’s hands on my arm. The hand felt nice and warm, and that was when I realized I was still on the edge of the bed, huddled into a ball.
“You’re freezing.” Luke’s tone was displeased. His hand rubbed up and down my arm. “Is there a reason why you slept this way?”
I felt uneasy letting him know what was going on in my head the night before. Now that he was here, last night’s worries didn’t seem as severe. A part of me kept saying that it was all in my head.
“I couldn’t really sleep.” I shrugged, trying to play it off.
“Why didn’t you call me?” Now he sounded annoyed.
I bit my lip before I could tell him the truth. He was silent, clearly waiting for my answer. “It didn’t seem that important.”
Luke made a humphing sound.
“I was going to have breakfast in bed this morning, but I’ve changed my mind. I’ll meet you in the greenhouse. There are a few things I need to talk to you about.”
He sounded like he was mad at me, and I couldn’t figure out what I had done to make him upset.
“We can’t have breakfast in the dining room?” The question slipped out of my mouth before I could filter it.
“No.” His answer was immediate.
Luke left my room without another word. Sighing, I got ready, lamenting the fact that I wouldn’t have time for my morning practice, but if Luke had come for me, it must be later than I had thought.
He didn’t have to say he cared—it was always in the little things he did, and usually, I found comfort in that, but something in me was screaming, telling me to listen. Didn’t I pride myself in the fact that I could see without my eyes? That I could find deceptions in plain sight? Was I going crazy? Had the years of running finally caught up to me, and because I avoided every memory from my past, was there even anything left of me?
I took my time getting to the greenhouse. There was no breeze this time around; the air was even lighter than it had been at night. I was about to take my seat when Luke’s hand took hold of my own. My brow furrowed in confusion as to why he stopped me from sitting. Was he going to make a big deal about the fact that I wore my glasses today?
He didn’t give instructions, not verbally, at least, but his intentions were clear. He pulled me toward the place where he usually sat. One of his hands wrapped around my back, and then he guided me down so I could sit on his lap.
That ache between my legs that only he could summon instantly appeared. Despite the conversation I’d had with Cecilia last night, my cheeks still warmed. I couldn’t help but recall the last memory I had of my uncle and the paradox of this moment.
There was some scraping going on as Luke fixed me a plate. Once he was satisfied, I heard the plate being placed right in front of me before he put a spoon in my hand.
“Eat.” It was a command.
Up until I lost my sight, I didn’t realize that, for most of us, eating was a visual experience. It was the first thing we noticed, followed by the smell. Even when trying new foods, we are guided by our sight before opening ourselves to new things.
I’d learned to adjust by using my sense of smell, but sometimes I missed something as simple as a fruit spread, pancakes, or a birthday cake. That last one made my throat clog up. I couldn’t recall any of my past birthdays, not the theme, not my parents, not one thing.
As soon as I scooped some food into my mouth, Luke seemed to relax.
“Why didn’t you call me, Summer?” Luke asked.
My oatmeal suddenly felt thicker in my mouth.
“Is this because of what has been happening between us?” His voice was hoarse.
“No.” I quickly faced him. “I…I was actually going to look for you, but then…” I sighed. Luke was patient, waiting for my answer. “I didn’t want to intrude in your life more than I already am.”
That was answer enough. I wouldn’t be throwing Cecilia under the bus either. She was just looking out for her boss’s well-being.
Luke’s silence spoke volumes.
“Luke?” I squeaked. If I wasn’t sitting on him, I would have been sure he had left me.
“Oh, I’m sorry, Summer. I’m trying to figure out how my tongue in your cunt gave the impression that you were intruding in my life?”
That was a good point. Still, I didn’t back down, though maybe I should have.
“You always leave me alone and tell me to go to bed.”
Except on New Year’s, but I was hysterical then, so that didn’t count.
“That has nothing to do with you,” he told me, and I snorted.
Luke did not like this because his hand was gripping my chin and forcing me to face him fully. He then removed my glasses from my face and threw them across the room. I could hear the thudding noise they made.
I took a deep breath.
“Oh, my little dove,” he chided. “I send you away not because I can’t wait to get rid of you. I do it because I want to fuck you.”
My mouth parted in a silent O.
“I knew I shouldn’t want you. I knew that in this lifetime or any other, you weren’t meant for me, but I’ve always been selfish and self-serving, and you, my sweet dove, are one of the most beautiful things I’ve ever laid eyes on.”
I sucked in a breath.
“For someone who can’t see, you haven’t lost sight of the important things. Witnessing life through your eyes has made it impossible for me to stay away from you. For over a decade, all I could think of was revenge. There was no future, just the past.”
I licked my lips.
My stomach was fluttering with wings I didn’t know existed inside of me. I was floating, but I wasn’t scared because I had a tether, and it was Luke. He said he would teach me to fly if I let him. I finally felt like my cage was open, waiting for me to leave and never return back to it.
“And now…do you see a future?” With me? I didn’t add the last part, but my hand moved to his chest and over his heart. I wanted to feel his reaction. Was his heart beating as wildly as mine? Were his hands clammy from the excitement racing through his body?
Luke let go of my chin and cradled my body, so I was forced to rest my head on his chest. I held my breath waiting for his answer.
“The past is going to bury me alive.” His voice was somber, and my excitement quickly faded. His hands, however, wrapped around me tighter so I wouldn’t let go.
I slowly slid my hands up his neck, and he stiffened but otherwise didn’t throw me off his lap. I stopped until I made it to his jaw. As much as I wanted to feel him, to know his face, I would not take what was not freely given to me.
“Let me help you,” I whispered.
Luke kissed my forehead before chuckling without emotion.
“Isn’t that why we are here in the first place? So you can help me?”
I didn’t back down.
“And you’re the only one who cares about getting justice for me.” I took a deep breath before continuing. “I am nothing special. I’m a simple statistic. I can’t even say that I got lucky because what happened to me before was not luck. It doesn’t matter what you need from me because what you have given me has been so much more.” I took another deep breath, and this next part almost felt silly to admit, but I wanted him to know. “He used to kiss my forehead all the time. It was how he gained my trust. He brought me comfort when I was at my most vulnerable. And he twisted that for his own pleasure… You, Luke, have shown me with your actions that you put my well-being above your own.”
Luke’s hand was at my nape, and he lightly pulled so he could control the movement of my neck, causing my face to tilt up. I heard his heavy breathing before I felt his lips.
If his kisses before were to make me whole, this one was to break away the pieces of myself that no longer fit. This kiss was the sweetest form of salvation. He tasted like regret when his lips met mine, but to me, they felt a lot like freedom.
