“Atty,” I say, confused, because I’m freaking out but feeling good all at once. “Fuck.”

  “What is it, baby? You need my tongue to make it better?”

  I nod helplessly, and he gets to work, holding himself up on one hand as he lowers his face between my legs. He doesn’t tease me. His tongue lashes at my clit, and he brings my hand up to the back of his head, encouraging me to fuck his mouth with my pussy.

  “Harder,” he demands, so I pull his hair until I know it hurts, eagerly rolling my hips up to match the pace of his finger. “There you go, dirty girl.”

  God fucking help me with this guy.

  Licking my clit just the way I like it, he eats me out for so long that his jaw must be killing him, but he doesn’t stop. Not until he knows he’s got me dancing on the edge.

  “Asshole,” I growl, kicking at him when he sits up and pulls his finger out.

  “You wanna come?” he asks, snatching my ankle to keep my foot still. “Take it.”

  I narrow my eyes and place the sole of my other boot on his chest, pushing him down until he’s the one lying on his back in the dirt.

  He might let me fuck him, but I already know he won’t fuck me. Not yet. He told me so in letter number thirteen, that he’d drag this out for as long as it takes and make me beg for it.

  I may have secretly been hoping he’d cave when it finally came to it, but he’s a stubborn prick and it’s always push and pull with him. He’s unpredictable. I can read his emotions like a book in the moment, but at the same time, I never know what’s coming next with Atticus, and that’s what I love so much about him. He’s exciting and fun and so different than any other person I’ve ever met.

  And he’s mine.

  Whether I want him or not, I’ve got him for life.

  Forcing myself to stop thinking so much, I crawl over him on my hands and knees and swing my leg over his body, sitting on his legs to undo the button on his jeans. He doesn’t help me take his cock out or even bother to lift his ass. He just holds on to my thighs and sucks on his bottom lip, devouring my body with his eyes. I’m pretty sure I’m covered in dirt, but he doesn’t seem to mind. He likes me like this—filthy—especially when he’s the cause, and I know he’s thinking about all the other places he could leave his mark on me tonight, whether it be with his teeth or his hands. The thought makes me shiver.

  “Are you cold?” he asks, knowing that’s not the reason.

  “Shut up.”

  He grins like a madman, groaning when I pull his dick out of his pants and dip my head to spit on it. “Fuck, baby. Do that again.”

  I do, stroking it in my fist a few times to cover it with my saliva. He clenches his jaw and digs his fingertips into my flesh, like it’s killing him to lie there and do nothing. I know this is meant to be a punishment for me, but he’s making me feel like a fucking queen.

  Leaving my clothes exactly as they are, I lift my skirt and move forward on my knees, lowering myself down to rub my pussy on his cock. I haven’t had him inside me for over half a year, and even though I’m sure it won’t hurt as much as it did the first time, I still sink down on him slowly, just the tip at first to test the waters.

  “Don’t be a cock tease, Vi,” he warns. “I’ll hurt you.”

  “But I like it when you make it hurt,” I say sweetly, throwing his own words back at him from earlier.

  He moves like he’s about to grab me, so I wrap my hand around his throat like he’s done to me so many times, shoving his head down against the ground. He grunts, and I grind down on him the rest of the way, until there’s not an inch of space left between us.

  “God…” he whispers, more to himself than me. “Move.”

  Knowing that part is for me, I give us what we both want and move my hips on him, pushing my ass out to rub my clit on his pelvis. I’ve always loved this position, but I really don’t have the thighs for it, and the way he’s looking at me right now is distracting as fuck.

  “I love it when you ride me like this,” he moans, squeezing my hip and guiding me back and forth. “You’re so pretty, baby.”

  Fuck my heart, the praise-loving little whore.

  “Will you stop talking?”

  He lets out a quiet laugh, leaning up on one elbow to grab my ass with his free hand. “You sure you don’t wanna hear it?”

  “I’m sure.”

  “You don’t wanna hear how hot I think it is when you use me? When you grind this wet little pussy on my cock like it’s your own personal fuck toy?”

  “No.”

  “What if I tell you how many times I moaned your name into my pillow when I was in prison?” He keeps going, turning my face to put his mouth next to my ear. “On one of the nights you hung up on my call, I fucked my own hand and pretended it was your throat. I thought about stuffing you with my dick until you couldn’t breathe. Right here,” he adds, tapping his finger against the base of my neck. “I came so fucking hard, Vi. It was everywhere.”

  I whimper and rock myself on him faster, using my fingers to play with my clit, desperate to find release. But he’s still not moving, and I can’t get the angle right.

  “Come on, baby,” he urges. “You can do it.”

  “I can’t,” I whine, dropping my face to his neck. “Atty, fuck me back.”

  “Not until you beg me for it.”

  “Please,” I say without argument. “I’m sorry I left you in there. Please, Atty.”

  “Tell me you still love me.”

  I growl and bash my fist into his chest. “That’s not part of the fucking game.”

  “My game,” he taunts, nipping at my cheek. “My rules.”

  I heave out an aggravated breath and push him back down, looking right at him and digging my sharp nails into his flesh. “I still love you, okay? It doesn’t matter wh—”

  Before I can finish, he grabs the back of my head with one hand and my ass with the other, pulling me down and holding me tight against him as he fucks up into me. Hard. I cry out and put my arms on the ground either side of his head, trying to hold myself steady, my thighs tightening as I feel myself coming all over his cock.

  “Keep going,” he orders halfway through my orgasm. “It doesn’t matter…”

  “What I do,” I add, moaning into his neck. “I can’t stop myself.”

  “I know, baby,” he says softly, tangling my hair with his fingers as he waits for me to ride it out. “I can’t either.”

  “Do you want to?”

  “Never.”

  CHAPTER 7

  ATTICUS

  As soon as she’s finished coming, she drops all her weight on my chest, exhausted. I smile up at the sky and gently roll her onto her back, placing my t-shirt out beneath her to stop the ground from scratching her up more than it already has. Knowing her thighs are probably aching from riding my dick for all of five minutes, I stretch her legs out and rub them better for her, massaging the feeling back into them.

  “What are you doing?” she asks, cracking an eye open to watch me.

  “Making you feel good before I fuck you up all over again.”

  She chuckles and tilts her head to look down at my dick. It’s still rock hard, leaking pre-cum at the sight of her, like it knows who it belongs to and it wants back in. I wrap my fingers around it and take in her pussy, but just as I’m about to move back between her legs, she stops me with a lazy shake of her head.

  “Not yet,” she says. “Show me.”

  I raise a brow at her, because the spoiled little brat is in no position to be making all these demands. “What?”

  “Show me how you made yourself come thinking about me. I wanna see.”

  “You think I care what you want?”

  “You care.” She leans up and crosses her long legs at the ankle, biting the tip of her finger in a way that makes her look more devil than angel. “And you and I both know you could never say no to me. I say jump and you s—”

  “Lie the fuck down.”

  She smirks and does as she’s told, following my every move as she waits for me to come to her. I climb on top of her on all fours and tap her wet pussy with my cock, stroking it once from the base to the tip. Closing my eyes, I imagine I’m facedown on the bed I woke up on not twelve hours ago. I push my face into my forearm next to her head and use her body like I used that shitty mattress, rutting into her as I fuck my own fist.

  She lies still, and I think about fucking her throat again. The night I was so fucking angry with her I could barely see straight. I was a nasty fucker to her inside my head, tying her down on our bed and straddling her face, watching the tears leaking out of her eyes, making her gag and retch on my dick. And once I knew she couldn’t take it anymore, I pushed four fingers inside her mouth along with my cock and made her choke on those too.

  “Violet,” I growl into my arm, biting it to keep quiet. “I need you.”

  She takes my jaw in her hand, and I can feel her eyes on the side of my face, her thumb stroking back and forth as she watches me. Unable to stop myself, I pull her head back by her hair and kiss her, sealing her mouth with mine and feeding her my tongue. She moans, and I rock my hips harder. My chest brushes her stiff nipples with every slide, and I can feel how wet her pussy is on the back of my knuckles, coating my hand with her juices.

  “Spread your lips for me, baby. I wanna come on your clit.”

  Breathing hot and hard against my mouth, she lets go of my face and reaches down between us to do as she’s told. I pull back and look down to watch what she’s doing, groaning at the feel of my dick pulsing in my hand, the pleasure racing up my spine.

  “Lift your ass up,” I demand. “Hold it open just like that.”

  She does, and my entire body shudders as I point my dick down and spill my release all over her pussy, careful not to waste a drop. Head still spinning, I kneel between her legs and hold her ass for her, spreading my cum around to make sure she’s covered in it. Then I scoop it all up with two fingers and shove it deep inside her.

  She gasps. “Atty—”

  “Are you still on the pill?”

  Please say no.

  She pales, and like the sick fuck I am, I’m suddenly way more excited than I should be. It’s such a stupid thing to wish for, because I’m nowhere near ready to be a dad, but if I could put a baby in her—my baby—she’d have no choice but t—

  “I’ll get the morning-after pill tomorrow.”

  “Okay,” I say, secretly hoping I can distract her enough to forget.

  “What about…”

  ‘What?” I ask, amused when I realize what’s going through her head. “You think I fucked my cell mate and caught something in there?”

  “You could have.”

  She’s right. I could have. But I didn’t and she knows it.

  “I would never cheat on you, Vi. That’s not me.”

  She nods, chewing the inside of her cheek. “I know.”

  “So what’s the problem?” I ask, averting my eyes back to my fingers in her pussy, still slowly fucking my cum into her.

  Her eyes narrow into thin slits, and I smirk right at her, laughing when she sits up and tries to smack me upside the head. “You twisted motherf—”

  Just as she lands in my lap, I put my hand over her mouth and lift a finger to my lips to shush her, my ears perking at the sound of branches snapping in the distance. Violet’s head turns as she listens too—the low voices getting closer. Knowing there are guys around here somewhere, I quickly grab my t-shirt and throw it on over her head, covering her half naked body with it. We stand up, and I leave my dick hanging out of my pants, checking her to make sure the hem comes down beneath her ass, considering that slutty little skirt she’s wearing does nothing to hide it. Satisfied no one will see anything, I tuck myself back in and zip my pants, watching as she crouches down to pick all the letters up off the ground. She picks up her own shirt next—which is useless and torn to shit—shaking it off before she moves to clean herself with it. I snatch it from her and throw it up into a tree, pulling her in and locking my arms around her waist.

  “Hey.”

  “Leave it.” I squeeze her ass, my dick hardening again when I feel how soaked she is down there. “I like knowing you’re walking around with my cum dripping out between your legs.”

  Her eyes darken, and she wraps her hand around the back of my neck, pushing up on her tiptoes to speak in my ear. “You’re sick, Atty.”

  “Mhmm,” I say, sneaking my tongue out to lick her cheek. “Does it make your pussy hurt?”

  She breathes out a chuckle and shakes her head at me, taking my hand before she bends over to grab the bottle of tequila. “I need another drink.”

  CHAPTER 8

  VIOLET

  “What was it like in there?”

  “Prison?” he asks, shrugging when I nod. “It sucked, Vi.”

  I pinch my lips to the side and avert my eyes. I’m leaning back between his legs with my letters in my lap, putting them back in the order they came in. He’s got one arm around my middle with his chin resting on my shoulder, holding his lighter up for me so I can see what I'm doing.

  “Because of me?”

  “A little bit, yeah,” he says, and it punches me right in the gut. “I mean, it would have been a hell of a lot easier if I hadn’t lost my mind worrying about you and if you’d been around for me to talk to. But prison’s still prison. It would have sucked either way.”

  I think about that a moment while I run my thumb over the scratchy ink on the pages, catching a few glimpses of his words as I go.

  You’re gonna pay for this, you little bitch.

  You can’t hide from me forever.

  Baby, you’re killing me.

  I’m coming for you.

  “Do you feel guilty?” he asks, probably seeing the same things I’m seeing.

  “Sometimes,” I admit. “Do you? For what you did to Jared?”

  “No,” he says honestly, because of course he doesn’t. “I told him to stay the fuck away and he didn’t listen. He deserved what he got.”

  “Atty, you almost killed him.”

  “And I would have done it for real if you hadn’t stopped him from kissing you.”

  “You know about that?”

  “Baby, I know everything when it comes to you,” he teases, pressing his face to mine to kiss my cheek, watching me read a minute before he speaks again. “Are we really not gonna talk about it?”

  “Talk about what?” I feign indifference, my heart racing with nerves.

  “Someone paid for my lawyers, Vi,” he says slowly, turning my chin when I refuse to look at him. “They paid off the judge too. I know it was you.”

  “I—”

  “Don’t lie to me.”

  Fuck.

  “I didn’t get you out,” I whisper. “I just got you a little less time.”

  “Five to ten years less is a lot more than a little.”

  “Yeah, well…” I clear my throat, pulling my face out of his grip. “You might be fucking crazy, but I wasn’t gonna leave you in there for years.”

  He chuckles and drops his chin back on my shoulder. “Thank you,” he says, and I say nothing. “Did you use all the money your grandmother left you?”

  “Only most of it. I’ve got enough left to finish college and pay the bills.”

  “What about the creepy house you wanted at the top of the hill?”

  “I’ll get there,” I say quietly. “Eventually.”

  He goes quiet then, and I swallow the anxiety creeping up my throat as our thoughts align as one. I said I’ll get there, not we, like it used to be.

  “What about you?” I ask in a lame-ass attempt to change the subject. “Are you coming back to college now you’re out?”

  “I burned down one of their dorm rooms,” he reminds me. “I think I’m expelled.”

  A laugh bubbles out of me, and I nod. “Yeah. Probably.”

  “God, I missed your laugh.” He sighs, tightening his arm around my waist so hard he’s damn near crushing my rib cage. “Baby, look at me.”

  “I don’t want to.”

  I hear the clicking sound of his lighter closing right before we’re suddenly clouded in darkness. “Is that better?”

  I nod, and he rakes his fingers through my hair, tipping my head back to get me to face him. I can’t see his eyes now—mine haven’t had time to adjust back to the dark—but I know they’re locked in on me, like he’s trying to slink his way into my skull and organize the mess in there. To get me to feel the things I’m desperately trying not to feel.

  Instead of speaking, he kisses my bottom lip, then the top one, coaxing my mouth open with his tongue. His hand comes around to the side of my neck, and he uses his thumb to tilt my face, controlling the kiss. It’s not messy or rough this time. He’s kissing me like we’ve got all the time in the world. Like we’ll get a million more of these before we die.

  “Baby,” he breathes into my mouth. “I wanna come home.”

  “Atty.”

  “Please,” he begs, stunning me, because I don’t think I’ve ever heard him say that word before.

  Shaking myself out of his trance, I try to stand my ground. “Not yet. I can’t be with you again until you prove to me it’ll be different this time. I’m not gonna repeat the last six years for the rest of my life, Atty. It’s not happening.”

  I still can’t see him properly, but I can feel the moment this rare sweet side of him crumples to dust. In the next second, I’m landing flat on my back and he’s hovering over me, his breath against my cheek as his hand comes back to my throat.

  There he is.

  “I’m only gonna say this once, so listen properly,” he growls against my flesh. “I’m not leaving these woods without you by my side. So you might as well stop fucking around with me and skip to the part where I get to take my girl home.”

 

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