Rescue Me, page 11
“What are you watching?”
“You,” Beau answered. “I think I’m trying to find the answers to questions that I don’t know how to ask.” That probably didn’t make a lot of sense, but it was the best explanation he could come up with. Beau sat back, putting some distance between them. It was hard to think with Mitchell so close. “I should probably go to bed. Jessica will be up a couple times during the night, and….” He kissed Mitchell and made an escape, because if he didn’t leave right this moment, he was likely to do something he wasn’t ready for.
This entire situation was throwing him for a loop, but he wasn’t sure how to tell Mitchell. He had told the truth, that he had felt better and a lot more in control since he’d confronted Gerome, but he’d displayed a lot more confidence than he felt. Beau didn’t think that Mitchell was anything like Gerome, but sometimes it felt like he was walking on quicksand, and he wasn’t quite sure how to handle all the changes in his life.
What he really needed was a chance to think and figure stuff out. Maybe staying here for the night was a bad idea, but Beau was afraid that Gerome was out there watching him, and he needed to make sure Jessica was safe. That was his top priority.
He closed the guest room door and sat on the side of the bed without turning on the lights. He didn’t want to make a sound and wake the baby, and this was the one place he knew he could be alone with his thoughts.
Randi came over, pranced onto his lap, and placed her paws on his chest. Beau took a deep breath to calm his nerves, wondering if he was being a complete and total fool. When they’d been kissing, he’d felt Mitchell’s excitement. It was hard to miss. He was pretty sure if he crossed the hall and joined Mitchell in his bedroom, he would be welcome.
“I don’t know what I should do,” he whispered to Randi. All his thoughts seemed to have melded together in a jumbled mess that refused to slow down.
A soft knock startled him, and Randi jumped down to the floor. Beau opened the door in case she started barking and woke Jessica.
Mitchell stood framed in the dim light from the hallway. “I’m sorry if I made you uncomfortable or went too fast or something.”
Beau met him in the hall, closing the door most of the way behind him. “You didn’t,” he whispered. “Not really. Sometimes I just can’t seem to figure out how to keep my thoughts and worries from taking over. I know it sounds dumb, but….”
Mitchell set his hand on his shoulder. “That happens to me too.” He smiled. “It sounds like you and I are both bumbling around in the dark trying to figure stuff out and not wanting to step on the other’s toes.” That was as good a description as any as far as Beau could figure out. Mitchell took his hand and guided him a few steps away. Randi wandered off toward the kitchen, and Beau lifted his gaze, Mitchell’s drawing his full attention. “What is it you really want? Don’t worry about me or what you think I might want. Just tell me what it is you want most.”
Beau hesitated for a second and then pulled Mitchell to him, pushed him against the wall, and proceeded to kiss the hell out of him. Mitchell had said to tell him what he wanted, and Beau figured he couldn’t have painted a clearer picture if he tried.
Mitchell closed his arms around him, returning the kiss with enough heat to melt Beau’s shoes. Damn, he was hot. Beau let Mitchell guide him across the hall and into the master bedroom. “Wait…,” Beau whispered, pulling away as soon as the door closed behind them.
“What is it?” Mitchell asked, stilling. In the dim light he looked like a teenager, all nerves and excitement. “What’s wrong?”
“Nothing.” Beau went through a mental checklist. Jessica was asleep just across the hall, and he had the baby monitor. The house was quiet, and he wanted this. “Everything is fine.” He sat on the edge of the bed. “It’s just that the last few months, whenever I think things are okay, that’s when everything goes to hell, and I wanted to make sure that there was nothing looming at the moment.” He smiled. “I can’t think of anything.”
Mitchell leaned over the bed, his hands on each of Beau’s knees, drawing closer. Their lips met, and Mitchell pressed him back onto the mattress. Beau sprawled and drew Mitchell down with him, holding him tightly as Mitchell’s weight held him against the bedding. “You know, we said that we should take things slowly, and yet this….”
“I’ve gone slow,” Mitchell said. “I wanted to do this—” He licked the base of Beau’s neck, sending heat racing through him like a freight train. “—since our first kiss. You taste like ambrosia, and I’ve wondered if the rest of you was the same.” He popped the first buttons on Beau’s shirt and parted the fabric, his lips doing incredible things to the exposed skin. Beau held on as Mitchell set him on fire. He was damned excited. His pants were suddenly way too tight, and all he could think about was the fact that he was warm, cared for, and that Mitchell hadn’t even removed his clothes and he was already so damned close to the edge that if he didn’t get himself under control he was going to go off in his pants—and that hadn’t happened since he was a teenager.
“Mitchell,” Beau breathed. “God….” He uncrossed his eyes and now, seeing straight, looked into Mitchell’s. Damn, he was gorgeous. Beau could get lost in those deep, beautiful, caring eyes. “You’re going to make me lose it if you aren’t careful.”
“You?” Mitchell smiled, drawing his lips closer once again. “I can’t get enough of you.” Beau scoffed lightly. “Really. Remember that first day when I came over to be nice because you had complained about the dogs, and….”
Beau felt his cheeks heat. “And you’re bringing that up now because…?” He felt bad enough about that.
“You opened the door with Jessica crying on your shoulder, and all I could think was how great you looked and that I was jealous of a little baby because she got to touch you. I know it sounds dumb, but my fingers actually tingled.”
“I was a complete mess. Jessica had been up for hours, and I hadn’t slept in days. There must have been roller bags under my eyes….”
“And you were gorgeous.” Mitchell kissed away his retort, and for a second Beau wondered if maybe there was something wrong with Mitchell’s judgment if he thought that was sexy. But then after two seconds of Mitchell pressing to him once again, working open his shirt and slipping a hot hand along his chest, Beau forgot about everything other than that heated touch.
His lips tingled, and he inhaled sharply when Mitchell pulled them away. “Don’t stop.” He felt alive for the first time in months. It was like Mitchell was clearing away the cobwebs and dust left over from the crash and burn of his previous relationship, and damn, he needed that so badly.
“I have no intention… unless you tell me to.” Mitchell locked their gazes, and Beau whimpered softly, needing more. His hips shifted because damn, he was getting desperate as waves of excitement rolled through him, crashing against his mind again and again.
“Not going to happen.” Beau slipped his arms around Mitchell’s neck and tugged him down. As far as he was concerned, the talking portion of the evening was over, and it was time for the moaning and gasping to begin—which Beau did until his throat was dry.
Mitchell seemed to have a sixth sense about what Beau liked and just how far to take it before pulling back. They hadn’t even undressed and Beau was panting, his hands shaking as he tugged at the hem of Mitchell’s shirt. Beau needed this off. When it seemed to fight him, he rolled them on the bed and straddled Mitchell’s body, got the shirt over his head, and raked his gaze down Mitchell’s body.
“Damn,” he muttered, taking in his pale skin, the dash of light hair in the center of his chest, trim, lean muscles, and pert nipples that just begged to teased. “You weren’t the only one with an active imagination, although mine seems to have fallen a little short of reality.” He cradled Mitchell’s cheeks in his hands, leaned closer, and kissed him while Mitchell wrapped strong, bare arms around him.
“I want you naked,” Mitchell breathed during a brief kissing break and proceeded to deftly divest Beau of his pants. They got caught on his shoes, but Beau kicked the whole mess off before yanking Mitchell’s belt away and getting rid of the pesky pair of jeans. After all the machinations and refusal to be apart, they were finally bare to each other, and Mitchell held him tightly, sliding his hands up and down Beau’s back until they cupped his buttcheeks, sliding up and over them.
“You have magic hands,” Beau whispered.
“That’s not all that’s magic,” Mitchell retorted.
Beau snickered. “God, that was really bad,” he said with a smile, Mitchell’s eyes dancing with delight. “You’re really making a dick joke at a time like this?” He rolled his eyes.
“I wasn’t joking,” Mitchell deadpanned.
“I see.” This was fun. He had never been with someone playful in bed. Gerome was always serious and ready to get down to business. “Well, are you going to enlighten me with the particular brand of magic that is Mitchell?” He grinned quickly and then closed the distance between them.
Mitchell shifted them on the bed, once again pressing Beau into the mattress. Beau loved Mitchell’s weight on top of him and the way their heat melded together. He really did have magic hands, and when those fingers closed around his cock, stroking slowly, it was maddening, like Beau’s head was going to explode if he just got a little more friction. Beau breathed deeply, perspiration breaking out as he wondered how he was going to keep himself from flying apart. Then the deliciousness stopped, and Beau wondered what was going on. “Why did you stop?”
A chuckle reached his ears as Mitchell slid down him. Then Beau was engulfed in hot, wet heat that sent his mind flying toward the stratosphere. Thinking about anything flew out the window. Mitchell was indeed magic… and gifted, judging by the fact that he took all of Beau so easily. Beau moaned loudly, trying not to make noise and failing completely. “Mitchell… I…. Jesus….” Stars formed behind his eyes, and he gripped the bedding in his fists, trying to stop himself from flying to pieces.
“Did I lie?” Mitchell asked, Beau’s cock bouncing against his belly.
“No…,” he whimpered, breathlessly. “But….”
Mitchell kissed him. “Just lie back and relax. You don’t need to worry about anything.” Mitchell smoothed his hands down Beau’s chest, hot breath following in their wake, and then sucked him down once more.
Beau’s leg shook with ecstasy. He hoped this never ended, but it seemed his traitorous body had its own ideas. Before he could stop himself, his entire body tingled. Beau managed to whimper a warning before his release slammed into him.
A rag doll had nothing on Beau when he lay back on Mitchell’s bed, his eyes closed, heart still beating fast but slowly returning to its normal speed. “I think I died and went to heaven. If you give me a minute, I’ll….”
Mitchell chuckled close to his ear, his weight settling next to him. “Um… I already…. You were hot, and things got a little out of hand for me.” He rested his head on Beau’s shoulder, both of them still breathing heavily. “You’re a real firecracker.”
“I’ve never been told that before.” Beau kind of liked it. The idea that Mitchell found him attractive was hot. Beau had never thought of himself as someone’s ideal guy. “But the hotness in the room lies with you.” He could watch Mitchell all day. He held him closer.
“You’re tensing.”
“I don’t mean to. But Jessica is going to be waking up in a few hours.” Beau closed his eyes as Mitchell got up, quietly leaving the room. When he returned again, a warm cloth skimmed lightly over Beau’s belly, and they got under the covers and Mitchell turned out the light. “I should check on her.” Beau got out from under the soft covers and trudged across the hall. Jessica was sound asleep in her portacrib, with Randi at the foot of the bed, watching over her. Beau stroked Randi gently before leaving the room once again. “She’s sleeping like an angel.”
Mitchell held up the covers, and Beau dropped off to sleep almost as soon as his head hit the pillow. He hadn’t fallen asleep like that in a long time. Maybe he did feel safe here.
BEAU WOKE with a start and checked the clock near the bed. It was three in the morning, and he was alone. Beau jumped out of bed and hurried to the guest room, where he found Mitchell with Jessica in his arms. He was sitting on the side of the bed, holding the last of a bottle, with Jessica sound asleep. The sight made him pause. There had been very few times in his life when a sight so beautiful stopped him in his tracks. Mitchell was bare-chested, dressed in boxers, and Jessica was so adorable in his arms. “I didn’t want to wake you. I figured you could use the rest. I changed her, and she’s ready to go back to bed.” Mitchell gently placed her in the crib and then turned back to him. “Go on back to bed. I’ll be right in.”
“Where are you going?” Beau asked.
“I’m just going to take care of these few things and then I’ll join you in bed.” Mitchell hurried away with the diaper and empty bottle.
Beau returned to the bedroom and got under the covers. Mitchell came in and slid right up behind him, gliding a hand over his belly. Mitchell tugged him closer. “Just go to sleep. Everything is fine. Jessica will hopefully sleep for a few more hours.” He caressed Beau’s arm, and the tension that had seemed to be an inescapable companion ever since Jessica came to him slipped away, at least for a little while.
BEAU ACTUALLY slept hard. He woke with light coming through the windows as Jessica cried out from the other room. Mitchell was still asleep when he slipped out of the bed. Beau got Jessica out of the crib and took her out to the other room along with the diaper bag. He changed her on the sofa and then got a bottle while she cried, tears running down her cheeks, until he got the formula the right temperature. The crying came to abrupt halt with the bottle. She sucked like her life depended on it.
“Poor little thing,” Beau whispered to her. “You were completely starving.” She always seemed to eat like she hadn’t seen food for days. He knew that was a good thing. Jessica’s healthy appetite was better than the alternative, where she was finicky and he had to try to coax her to eat.
After taking Jessica into the living room, he sat on the sofa and got comfortable. There was something soothing about feeding her, almost like yoga. She was happy, and his mind got a chance to wander a little in the quiet. It took a little trip back to the bedroom where Mitchell lay sleeping. Beau swallowed hard, pulling himself out of the flight of fancy as he sat Jessica upright and gently burped her before giving her the bottle once again.
“I was wondering where you’d gotten off to,” Mitchell said as he shuffled into the room in a pair of shorts. “I woke up to an empty bed. I figured this little princess must have been hungry.”
“She was. I’m surprised she didn’t wake you.” He watched Jessica’s eyes drift closed now that her belly was getting full. “I know that you have to feed the dogs and then get to the clinic. I’ll get our stuff packed and head on home.” He yawned widely and was unable to cover it. “I feel a lot better this morning. Maybe what I really needed was a good night’s sleep to stop feeling so paranoid all the time.”
“You don’t need to rush off.”
Beau nodded. “Thanks, but I have work I need to do, and I know you do as well.” He needed a chance to think about last night and the way Mitchell made him feel. Damn, it would be so easy to fall for this man—he was gentle and caring—but the truth was that Beau didn’t trust his own judgment. “I also have some calls to make to my lawyer. He’s working to put the property in Philadelphia up for sale for me.” He suspected that movement on that front was why Gerome had been trying to get even with him. “It still makes me angry, what happened to Randi.”
“It looks like she’s going to be fine.” Mitchell sat down next to him. “You need to promise me that you’ll call if you see or even suspect that anyone is hanging around. The next time, we’ll call the police and get them out to look around. That might scare off whoever is behind this if they know the police are involved.” He sighed. “I want you to be safe.”
“I will be. And you need to do the same.” Beau didn’t want anything to happen to Mitchell either. If someone hurt his dog and was watching him, then they would know about Mitchell and might try to hurt him too. The idea sent a cold shiver up Beau’s back.
“I’m going to get dressed, and then I’ll take you and Sleeping Beauty home.”
MITCHELL HELPED Beau carry his things into the house and had a look around before getting ready to leave for the clinic. “Call me if anything happens.”
Beau smiled. “I will, I promise.” Mitchell kissed him, and this was no simple goodbye kiss, but one that made him tingle and contained a promise of more to come. Beau liked that. He stood holding Jessica and watched out the front window until Mitchell got into his car and drove off. With a sigh, he buckled Jessica into her swing. He figured he could try to get some work done while she was occupied.
One thing that Beau had had to do was change his way of working. Instead of getting long bouts of time where he could concentrate, he had had to retrain his mind to work in quick, short bursts. He usually got a few hours once Jessica was in bed, but the rest of his work was completed in half-hour increments throughout the day. It should probably drive him crazy, but it was a necessity.
“You doing okay, sweetheart?” Beau asked when he came up for air after making strides on his project. Jessica was quiet, her eyes closed. Randi lay near her feet. She was so cute when she slept. Beau returned to work, figuring that as long as she was content, he’d take advantage of it.
Thoughts of Mitchell invaded as he turned back to his computer. His fingers hovered over the keyboard as he remembered the way Mitchell’s hands glided over his skin. Heat followed wherever Mitchell touched, and Beau closed his eyes, his mind floating on the glorious memory, savoring it and the way Mitchell had made him feel completely alive and whole again. Gerome had ripped away a part of him, and Beau felt like that missing piece was returning.
