The Inheritance, page 24
“Because?”
“Because it’s personal. Private. I don’t know.”
She looked up in time to see Doc narrowing her eyes. “Ash. Nothing has ever been personal or private between us. When you speak with me, things that would be inappropriate to speak to your friends about are absolutely things you need to talk to me about if it has you this off-center. You can’t afford to be off-center right now.”
Heat flowed into Ash’s cheeks, and she knew her blush must be spectacular. “I can’t.”
“You can’t because you’re ashamed? Because you’re afraid what you did is wrong, and I’ll judge you?”
“No!” She paused, “Well, maybe. I don’t know. I’m completely confused right about now and don’t want to…”
The rocking continued while Ash worked out what to say.
“I know I can tell you stuff about me, but it involves another person.”
“Phyla.”
Ash’s gaze shot up from where she’d been pretending to study the magazines laid out on the coffee table between them. How did Doc read her so well? She hadn’t said anything negative about Phyla and had even praised her a couple of times in the last forty minutes. She settled for lifting a shoulder and leaving it at that. She’d never lied to Doc about anything. She knew enough to realize that would defeat the whole purpose of her visits.
“Ash.” When Ash looked at her again, Doc tilted her head to the side and regarded her. “I’m going to say it again. You cannot afford to be off-center right now. I’m sorry whatever it is involves Phyla, and you think you’ll be breaking some kind of code of honor between you, but nothing you say will ever go beyond these walls. You can’t put me into the same category as your friends when you tell me things.”
Ash thought about how upset Phyla had been when she thought Ash might have told people about the sex they’d had. It might just be Doc, but it still felt like a betrayal to say anything now. “Something happened last night that I thought went fantastic, but Phyla came undone this morning accusing me of playing games, and it seemed like she thought I was only out to bring her down and that I was going to use what happened to do that.”
“Last night, you thought everything was fine. You left on good terms?”
“Yeah.” Her voice held the incomprehension she’d felt when Phyla jumped all over her that morning.
“But this morning, Phyla was angry?”
“She was drunk, well, maybe not drunk, but I could tell she’d had a ton to drink, and she had to have been drinking between when I left last night and when she came into work at six. And yeah, she started accusing me of that stuff I said and, I don’t know. I don’t get it.”
The rocking stopped, and Doc used her foot to scootch a matching footstool in front of her rocker. She put her feet up and resumed her easy cadence. “Let me see if I can help you figure it out. When a person is at the top of their profession, especially a woman, they generally haven’t gotten there by being nice. They make a lot of enemies and trust no one. Through experience, they come to expect attacks from every quarter, even from people they consider friends, because many times, when working with the amount of money Phyla deals with at her level, people will prioritize money over friendship and turn on you.”
The idea of turning on a friend because of money was repugnant to Ash. “I’d never do that. Hell, I’d give them every last dime I had if it would help a friend out.”
Doc’s eyes grew soft. “And you’re the one in a million person who would. I have no doubt about that. Anyway, back to what I was saying. Given that Phyla hasn’t known you as long as Darby and I have, she either won’t know that about you or won’t believe it. That’s the first part I want you to hold in your mind here, okay?”
Ash nodded. That was easy enough.
“Here’s what’s going to be difficult for you to understand, I think, but hear me out.”
Again, Ash nodded. “Okay.” She set her soda on a coaster and rested her elbows on her knees, a position she habitually took when she wanted to really hear what the other person had to say.
“The amount of time you two have spent together probably lowered some of the shields she’s erected around herself. I’ve mentioned to you before that quite often the strong, cold types harbor some hidden need, usually loneliness and a longing for personal connection. You’ve told me before that nearly all of the time, you’re a dominant during sexual encounters.”
Doc was so close to knowing the truth that Ash pursed her lips and looked down.
“Phyla is dominant in all aspects of her life. I could be wrong, and I’m sure you’ll tell me if I am, but finding someone like you who can and would dominate her during sex is probably such a freeing experience that she abandoned herself to it when you offered.”
Ash still kept her lips clamped shut and continued to stare at the coffee table. She refused to betray Phyla in any way, especially not in this.
“Remember what I told you first. Phyla has been fighting and clawing her way to the top for at least the last twenty years. In what she now believes was a time of weakness, she allowed you to do what many people would consider degrading. She allowed you to dominate her, and now, she’s terrified of what will happen if people find out her deepest, darkest desires.”
Ash sat back and rested her elbow on the sofa’s arm. She leaned her head over and covered her eyes with her hand. “Fuck.”
“I’m going to tell you what I tell all of my clients. When sex is involved, communication must be a top priority. You’re going to have to talk to her, Ash. I’m not going to say you need to convince her of anything, but you need to tell her what you’re feeling and try to help her clarify what she might be feeling. Then, it’s up to her to believe what you say or not.”
Ash sat up again. “I’m not saying that’s what happened, but why would someone think being submissive during sex is bad or wrong? Everybody gets turned on by certain things. I mean, a lot of people at the club enjoy BDSM, but no one looks down on them for it.”
Doc looked at the ceiling while she thought and eventually refocused on Ash. “To many people in society, people who are more circumspect about their sexuality and their sexual partners, BDSM or the idea of dominance is something they secretly read about in what they consider to be dirty books. They haven’t been around it like you and Darby have, so to them, it’s dirty. A secret that they believe other people will judge them for if they were to find out. In Phyla’s case, I imagine she’s afraid her enemies will use it to bring her down.”
“Huh.” Ash considered Doc’s words. “I never thought of it like that.”
“Obviously, Phyla has, and it would be good to talk to her about what you feel and about how you don’t believe dominant/submissive sex is something to be ashamed of for either of you.”
Ash glared at Doc. “I never said we had sex.”
Doc miraculously kept her face blank. “No, you didn’t.”
“And I’m not her enemy.”
“Tell her that.”
“I have.”
Doc shrugged, “Then tell her again.”
By the time their session ended, Ash had a lot to think about. Unfortunately, she also had an evening dinner meeting she needed to attend. She groaned at the thought and rubbed her temples. “God, Doc. I’ve got to go to this dinner meeting tonight. I hate these things. And I really don’t like this business stuff. I mean, yeah, I like that I can pull out of all the shitty things Harcourt was doing, you know, destroying the world and oppressing the people kind of stuff, but…oh, never mind.”
Doc studied her a while before saying anything. “You can do anything for a year, Ash. Then, we’ll see. As far as this dinner, tonight, you used to like going out with your friends.”
“Friends?”
The bitterness in her laugh had Doc’s eyes narrowing, but she held her peace.
“I can see why Phyla doesn’t have any. It’s like you’re chum and all these sharks are circling. Everybody looks at you like they’re hoping to get on your good side so you can help their career or lend them money to start their business or, I don’t know, marry you so they can be fucking richer than God.”
“That’s quite the change from the easy-going Ash we all know and love.” Doc’s smile had a hint of worry in it. “It’s only been a little over a month, Ash. Give yourself time to settle in.”
They rose, and Doc walked her to the door. “I’m always here for you, and my door is always open.”
“Thanks, Doc. See you later, yeah?” Ash pulled on her coat as she walked out. She’d begun keeping a nice change of clothing at the Club, and she headed there now to get ready for that evening’s fancy dinner. She scoffed at the idea before kneeling in front of Diva and pulling the soft head in close to her chest. “Another meeting and then we can go see Barney. But, first, we get to stop in and see Darby. What do you think? Sound good to you?” Diva’s stubby tail wagged and the two headed off down the street.
Doc watched from her window. The unease she’d felt from the beginning of this whole inheritance venture hadn’t abated in the slightest. It was unfortunate that Phyla McGuire checked every one of Ash’s boxes as far as lovers go. It was a complication to an already complicated scenario, and as she watched her round the corner, Doc sighed and turned to greet the next client coming through the door.
Twenty-Two
Since there was still an hour or so before Ash needed to be at the dinner party, she was sitting at the bar in Code One, nursing an iced tea Darby had set in front of her. The customer base was a nice blend of new women who generally sat on the left watching with wide-eyed wonder what was happening with the regulars on the right. In the past, Ash had enjoyed getting cleaned up and participating both as a dominant and, in rarer cases, as just a participant in some casual sex with either a regular or a newbie.
Kelsey walked over and pushed onto a high stool next to her. Ash admired her dark grey linen slacks, starched black shirt, and grey suspenders that perfectly matched the slacks. She rounded out the look with a black bowtie, and while she always looked great, the outfit was particularly becoming that night.
Kelsey set her bourbon on the bar, pulled out a cigarillo, and began twirling it in her fingers. “Hey.”
“Hey, yourself. And I have to say, you look really hot tonight.”
Kelsey’s lip quirked up. “Look who’s talking. Shao said you came in a few times with Ms. Uppity Muck and ordered a bunch of suits.” She indicated Ash’s casual jeans and a button-down shirt. “That’s not one of her designs, obviously. I’d love to see you in a three-piece. I might even change sides for the night if you get my meaning.”
She turned laughing eyes on Ash, who smiled back. “I have to admit, I feel pretty good when I wear her stuff, but I’m not on the prowl right now.”
Kelsey sipped her bourbon and put the unlit cigarillo between her lips. Ash rarely saw her without her signature prop. It was as though the thing was just another appendage Kelsey never thought about anymore. “I hear through the grapevine you’re spending a lot of time with Ms.—”
Ash held up her finger. “I don’t appreciate you calling her Ms. Uppity Muck. She’s a friend who’s helped me out quite a bit lately.”
“Yeah, sorry. I just get pissed because I can spend months working on a bid for a project, and when I’m this close to making a deal,” she held her finger and thumb an inch apart, “if McGuire wants the project, she swoops in and takes it.” She shook her head, “Months of work down the drain.”
Ash wondered where this conversation was going and knew that with Kelsey if she just kept sipping her tea, she’d eventually say what was really on her mind.
“Anyway, we’ve missed you around here. You’ve been pretty scarce these last few months. Everything okay?” Kelsey glanced to the end of the bar where a corner of Diva’s bed extended past the skirting. Diva’s leg was sticking out, and every now and then, she’d give a little kick that told Ash she was sound asleep. Regulars at the Club knew she was a PTSD dog, and they accepted both her and Ash alike.
Ash sighed, “Yeah. Just…kind of overwhelmed. There’s a lot going on and…well, I don’t know if you’ve heard—”
“I heard. I never figured you for a businesswoman.”
Ash lifted a shoulder and nodded. “I know, but it’s hard not to be with Phyla McGuire as a personal tutor.”
Kelsey’s brows rose. “Well, I have to say, she’s not bad to look at and her style’s to die for. But, definitely not my type. I like ‘em submissive, and as one of the most powerful women in the country, hell, in the world, Phyla McGuire’s definitely not submissive.”
There was a wetness between Ash’s legs that might say otherwise if she cared to share. Which she definitely did not. Even though she was still stinging from that morning’s conversation, she’d also been thinking about how incredibly erotic the previous evening had been. “I’ve never known anyone with such a formidable personality, that’s for sure, but, honestly, she’s a great teacher. Doesn’t take any bullshit from anybody. Sometimes, if she knows I’m going to be too nice, you know, like if I don’t realize I’m being manipulated or am about to get walked all over by one of my subordinates, she lays into them like there’s no tomorrow.” Ash stifled a groan since it was controlling someone with precisely that kind of power that got her body humming like a live wire ready to spark.
“You’re blushing. I never knew power turned you on.”
“It’s not that.” It most certainly was that, but Ash didn’t think a little misdirection would hurt. “I was just remembering how stupid I felt after she laid into and actually fired this one vice president. I was so naïve and hadn’t realized the game he was playing. I have to give Phyla credit, though. Afterward, she patiently brought out the shit I was supposed to study before the meeting and showed me what the guy had intended to do and why that would have been a disaster for the company. If I’d have done my homework like she’s always preaching, he wouldn’t have been able to manipulate me like that.”
“Yeah, I get it. The cornerstone of any successful business executive is the ability to go into a meeting one hundred percent prepared for any and all contingencies.”
She sounded so much like Phyla that Ash turned and studied her.
“What?” Kelsey looked down and self-consciously brushed at her chest to see if she’d accidentally dripped some bourbon onto her shirt or something.
“I know you’re a businesswoman, but what is it that you do, exactly?”
“I’m one of many vice presidents at Fuller Construction.”
“Construction? How do you know the construction business?”
Kelsey tapped her glass on the wooden bar top, and when Darby glanced over, she held it up, asking for another. “I’m third generation. I worked my way up from the bottom of my family’s business. Did every single job there is to do. When my Dad had to sell, I went to work for Fuller.” She shook her head, “Old lady Fuller’s a douche, but it’s a job, and I get paid fairly well.”
Ash ran a finger up the coolness of her glass. The way her fingertip slid through the tiny droplets of moisture brought to mind her hands sliding over Phyla’s soft, shower-moistened skin. Pulling her mind away from thoughts of those luscious contours, thoughts that were sure to give her away by pinking her cheeks or causing any number of tells Kelsey was sure to pick up on, Ash turned back to the issue at hand.
She and Phyla had been interviewing candidates for the top positions at both Redfin, where the CEO had bailed when Phyla discovered some fraud going on, and at Tyden, where Ash had sacked the president. She wasn’t sure how running a construction firm compared to running an energy business, but Ash hadn’t felt the kind of connection with any of the candidates that Phyla said she needed. “You ever think of maybe changing jobs?”
“Sure, I think about it all the time. There just aren’t that many good paying jobs out there for a woman with only a bachelor’s degree in business.”
Ash didn’t get the feeling Kelsey had come over to manipulate her into this conversation, but if she’d learned anything, it was that when you’re rich, you just didn’t know. She decided to table the topic until she could run it past Phyla, and as soon as that thought crossed her mind, she could hear Phyla saying, Do your homework, Ash. She may be a friend, but you still need to do your due diligence if you’re thinking of hiring her.
A sudden, unexpected surge of jealousy wrapped its ugly arms around her chest. Kelsey was dominant, and that’s what Phyla liked. Well, had liked, anyway. Maybe she should forget the whole idea of putting Kelsey into a position where the two of them would meet. Or maybe that was a shitty way to think about both of them. Phyla wasn’t hers, after all, but even with that being the case, she was constantly on her mind no matter what else was going on.
When Darby brought her bourbon, Kelsey tapped the glass on the bar and stood. “Anyway, I’m glad to see you in here. Don’t be a stranger, okay?”
Ash nodded and watched her walk to the right side of the room, where she took a seat in her usual overstuffed chair and waited for someone to approach.
Darby tapped Ash’s iced tea glass. “Another?”
“No thanks. I need to head to another one of those fucking cocktail parties. I have to get dressed pretty soon. She continued to watch Kelsey, trying to get a feeling for why she’d really come over.
When Darby followed Ash’s gaze, she saw a newbie approach Kelsey and sit on the arm of her chair. “Are you thinking about having sex with her? Because if you are, I think that would be an even worse disaster than when you and I were together. She’s a hard butch who’s not even remotely submissive.”
A wide grin spread across Ash’s face, and she looked back at her best friend. “You and I had a few great times, though, once we figured out who was in charge on any particular night.” The answering smile was what had attracted Ash to her friend when they were still freshmen in high school. “Hey Darb. I’m kinda getting paranoid about people, you know, wondering if they’re talking to me because they’re my friend or because of, well…everything. To be honest, you, Doc, Barney, and Phyla are the only ones I completely trust not to want something from me. I know it sounds stupid because I’ve only been at this a couple of months now, but—”
