The Power Of Point Of View, page 23
In Puzzle's POV, we're given a glimpse of his motivation when he flings the pelt down, expecting praise or sympathy and getting nothing friendly in response. He recognizes that Shift's interest has changed and notices that “wicked gleam.”
We don't yet know what Shift has planned or how it involves Puzzle and the lion skin. We know only what Puzzle knows … or perhaps we know a tiny bit more, because, well, we know he's a character in a novel, and he doesn't! We know that Shift must have a secret plan for this lion's skin. But we don't know what the secret is. We just know he's taking advantage of Puzzle's need for approval and that he's not that friendly fellow he's presenting himself to be. For this moment, we're enjoying the experience of gradually coming to suspect Shift.
A new writer might use multiple POV to switch immediately to Shift and have him detail his nefarious plans. But then we'd know we'd know Shift's motives way too soon, before we could experience that gradual dawning of suspicion. We wouldn't get the full “Puzzle” treatment, and we wouldn't be able to identify with his cluelessness. Fortunately, Lewis knew how to draw out the suspense — and suspense is all about postponing. This isn't easy to do when you're inside the head of the character with the secret, so Lewis takes his time, staying inside Puzzle until he's sent away to the market.
One way to gracefully switch POV is what I call the entry-exit technique: having entered an event from one POV, we exit from another. For instance, as Puzzle leaves, the perspective changes to Shift. Now he's the one with the goal: to make some reprehensible use of the lion pelt. But notice how the POV still conceals his actual intent by focusing on Shift's actions (finding the needle and thread) and emotions (smugness at being so clever) but not his thoughts:
As soon as he was alone, Shift went shambling along, sometimes on two paws and sometimes on four, till he reached his own tree. Then he swung himself up from branch to branch, chattering and grinning all the time, and went into his little house. He found needle and thread and a big pair of scissors there; for he was a clever ape and the Dwarfs had taught him how to sew. He put the ball of thread (it was very thick stuff, more like cord than thread) into his mouth so that his cheek bulged out as if he were sucking a big bit of toffee. He held the needle between his lips and took the scissors in his left paw. Then he came down the tree and shambled across to the lion-skin. He squatted down and got to work.
This is great fun. Shift can still conceal exactly what his scheme is, and as long as he doesn't consciously formulate a thought like “He meant to use the lion skin as a disguise,” we'll still be in the dark on the details. But now that we're in Shift's head, we can scout for clues to his plans. Additionally, we can get that illicit doubling effect of participating in his actions while suspecting his motives.
Note that this doubling can be achieved most effectively if we stay in one POV for long enough to actually experience the event through that one character. Once you've established the character's perspective and knowledge, the reader can take over and imagine (even when not in his POV) what he's thinking and feeling. In this case, whenever we see Shift after this scene, we don't have to be in his POV to know that he's scheming and conning. This is real identification, and it's what we're aiming for; yet, it does require adroit handling of the POV shift.
Keep in mind that whatever POV we're in, that's the character whose immediate goals and conflicts are important to the reader. By controlling the order of the POVs, you control the effect each POV has on the scene. Take advantage of that power.
You should also choose your shifting moment wisely. Make the shift itself a signal that something has changed or something new is going to happen, such as shifting just before or after a character reveals a secret.
Choosing the Shifting Point
Now that you know your options for shifting and how to shift smoothly, let's talk about appropriate times to shift POV. Look for the places in the scene that will make for more graceful shifts while calling subtle attention to some hidden clue, conflict, or theme. In fact, you might look at your own scene's unique structure and see what the scene segments are. (I define a segment as any unit of a scene, any discernible piece of action.) Stay in one POV through one unit of the scene and switch only when that segment is done.
There are some basic structural markers that are natural spots for a POV shift. For example, scenes can often be easily broken in half, with the change occurring at some pivotal moment in the middle. This is the entry-exit technique; you start the scene in his POV, and halfway through switch to hers. Or you might divide the scene in thirds, with an introduction, the major event in the middle, and the aftermath of the event in the end. The physical entrance or exit of a character in the scene is also a potential shifting point, as the scene personnel has changed.
Here are some other opportunities for shifting. Let's look again at Hemingway's famous short story “The Short Happy Life of Francis Macomber,” which we first examined in chapter one. Recall that there are three major characters on this safari in Africa: Francis Macomber, a middle-aged American with a younger wife; Mrs. Macomber, the wife; and Robert Wilson, the macho hunter leading the safari. In the opening scene, they come back to camp with a dead lion, and Macomber lets everyone think that he fired the killing shot. In fact, as his wife knows, Wilson did the killing. Mrs. Macomber doesn't try to conceal her scorn for her husband, “the coward.” In fact, she slips away that night for a fling with the much more virile Wilson, and she doesn't even try to keep it a secret.
The final scene of the story has them going out on another shoot. This time, Macomber restores his lost manhood by shooting a buffalo, earning the respect of Wilson. But his wife doesn't fall back into his arms. In fact, when the wounded buffalo attacks him, she shoots Macomber. Here is the big moment:
Wilson had ducked to one side to get in a shoulder shot. Macomber had stood solid and shot for the nose, shooting a touch high each time and hitting the heavy horns, splintering and chipping them like hitting a slate roof, and Mrs. Macomber, in the car, had shot at the buffalo with the 6.5 Mannlicher as it seemed about to gore Macomber and had hit her husband about two inches up and a little to one side of the base of his skull. Francis Macomber lay now, face down, not two yards from where the buffalo lay on his side and his wife knelt over him with Wilson beside her.
Three characters all play an important role in this dramatic scene. If you were given the assignment of rewriting the scene, going into each POV once, how would you order it and when would you shift? (Macomber is dead for the last couple pages, so he might not be the best narrator at that point!) Here are some considerations:
Information control. Here's where you shift to control what information the reader gets. Readers have debated for decades whether Mrs. Macomber really meant to kill her husband (Wilson certainly thinks so). If you wanted to control the timing of the revelation of her motive, you might start the scene — as they go out on the hunt — in Macomber's POV, furious with his wife for sleeping with Wilson. His POV then provides her motive. As an experienced hunter, Wilson can effectively narrate the middle section where they shoot the buffalo, and he can also give his expert eyewitness testimony about how Mrs. Macomber took the fatal shot. He can also pose the question of whether she intended the death. Finally, to answer that question, you could end the story in her POV, as she's the only one who truly knows her own mind.
Attention focus. You might choose to shift when some change in the events means the POV character's thoughts are no longer relevant, so you shift the reader's attention to someone else. For example, Macomber's attention in that pivotal moment is all on the buffalo, so you could shift then to Wilson's POV, as he's a bit farther away and can see Mrs. Macomber take aim.
Power shift. Start in the POV of one character during some power struggle, and when something happens and the power shifts, switch to the other. In this approach, you might start with Mrs. Macomber's POV, because in the beginning, she has sexual power over both men. But then, when Macomber kills the first buffalo, the power shifts to him, as he has now conquered his sense of cowardice and no longer needs his wife's approval. Finally, in the end, Wilson has the power because he knows (or suspects) that Mrs. Macomber has committed murder. Or, for variety, you can shift to the character who has just lost the power struggle.
Perspective juxtaposition. Sometimes it's fun to shift to show how differently the characters view a situation. Show the event from one person's perspective, then “review” it from the other's. For example, we learn Macomber regards his killing the buffalo as a great triumph, and a shift then to Mrs. Macomber's POV would show that she sees the event as a threat — now she can no longer manipulate him with her contempt.
Emotion overload. Paradoxically, it's sometimes best to shift away from the POV of a character who is undergoing some heavy emotional upheaval. Set up the situation in that POV, and just when the emotion gets too excruciating, shift to a more detached POV to keep the emotion from becoming too melodramatic. So you might be in Macomber's POV as he psyches himself up for the last chance to prove his manhood. Then, just when he's about to shoot, switch to Mrs. Macomber's POV, who watches the hunt even as resentment consumes her. After she realizes what she's done, shift to Wilson's POV for the aftermath of the shot.
Smooth Shifting
There's a real art to shifting without jolting the reader. You want to shift smoothly, without a bump, but also clearly and decisively so that the reader knows she's in a new POV now. Give her a way to get oriented immediately in the new mind. Here are four basic techniques:
Use the new POV character's name right away.
Quickly use a head word (like thought, felt, mused, wondered, ached, or tasted) to convey thought, feeling, or perception from the new perspective.
Use some action for transference of perspective.
Use some object, like a prop, for transference of perspective.
Sometimes authors add an extra line break to signify a change of POV. But if you shift more than a couple times in a scene, you'll annoy the reader by putting in line breaks each time. If you shift POVs every page and use extra lines each time, it's just a waste of paper! Better to go with smooth but clear transitions.
Furthermore, you should almost always start a new paragraph when you start a new POV. If you're doing a quick pan of the group, you might keep that all in one paragraph, but even then, you should start a new paragraph as soon as you establish the primary POV for the next passage.
It's not a rule that you can only shift to each POV once in a scene (although it's often more effective). If you want to shift back to a POV — for example, Macomber to Wilson to Mrs. Macomber to Wilson — the same basic guideline applies: know why you're shifting and what experience this “returning POV” will give to the reader. Then, do it gracefully. Just keep in mind that ordinarily, the longer the passage in each POV, the more textured the experience will be. In fact, by using a longer passage, you get most of the benefits from single POV (deeper reader identification, more character development) without the hassle (blinkered perspective, character “shut out”).
You probably figured out that multiple is, in some ways, more complicated to work with than single. It certainly has more choices involved, which is both a benefit and a challenge. But if you consider what your purpose is, you'll find the choices are easier to make.
What's in a Name?
One minor note: Multiple POV can complicate what you call your other characters, and it might mean that they are called one name in their own POV sections and something else in another's POV — not just in dialogue, but in the narrative itself.
For example, Macomber's wife, Margaret, thinks of herself, as most of us do, by either our given name or what our intimate friends call us, so in the scenes where her POV controls, you would identify her as “Margaret” or “Margot.” (“Conversation is going to be so difficult,” Margaret said. Margot said pleasantly, “If you make a scene, Francis, I'll leave you.) But Macomber thinks of her mostly in relation to himself (this could be why she wants to leave him!), so in his POV, she would be identified mostly as “his wife.” (He realized that his wife was not in the other cot in the tent.) Wilson is a punctilious sort of fellow. He might sleep with another man's wife, but he wouldn't be so forward as to call her by her first name. (Mrs. Macomber, in the car, had shot at the buffalo with the 6.5 ….)
Will this confuse the reader? Not if you identify first name and surname early on. (This should probably be on first reference: Margaret, [Macomber's] wife, looked away from him and back to Wilson.) Then use the “self” term exclusively in her POV to establish her identity in her own mind. This will likely be her name or nickname. It's fine if it's different from what others call her, as long as you establish it's what she calls herself. “Margot” might be “Margaret” to her mother, “Mrs. Macomber” to her servants, and “Dear” to her husband. One way to help the reader keep this straight is to have each character use the same name for her in dialogue that they do when they are the POV character. So Margot is always Mrs. Macomber to Wilson, whether we're hearing him speak or think; it would be too confusing for readers if, when in his POV, he “thought” of her as Margot.
Of course, there are complexities within complexities here, as with most POV opportunities. What do you do when a character is undercover, using a false name? Presumably, in his POV, you might use his real name (or nickname), however he thinks of himself. Consider this example:
Trent wrapped his brass shield in a sock and hid it away, then closed the drawer and walked back into the living room where Lil Barfy waited.
“Hey, Jonesy,” Barfy said, holding up a beer. “You want one a these before we go bust that safe?”
Trent shook his head, too nervous to speak, certain that Barfy would hear “cop” in his voice.
Just be sure you never slip up and have Barfy think of him as “Trent”; that name exists only in Trent's POV database, not Barfy's.
In Part Three, we'll explore some techniques to help you develop the POV characters and their ways of narrating. We'll start with individualizing their perspectives, then explore the different levels of penetration within each POV passage, finishing up with some tips and tricks and troubleshooting.
EXERCISE
PRACTICING SHIFTING
For one of your scenes, list the names of all potential major POV characters. Then jot down terms that give a sense of each person's perspective during the scene. This should include goal or conflict. For example:
Macomber: revealed as a coward, determined to prove himself Margot: regretting her marriage, determined to escape
Wilson: feels contempt for this couple, but unwillingly drawn to each of them
Look over a scene you've already written, or sketch out a scene. Who seems, at first thought, to provide the best opening POV character for this scene? Look at the goals and conflicts you identified in question one, and revise the first couple paragraphs to reflect those. Add in the character's thoughts and feelings if necessary.
Find a good shifting point in your scene. Why does this seem an effective place to change POV? What effect will that have on the reader's experience?
In one or two sentences, make a transition from the first POV character to the second. Be sure and use the new POV character's name and some kind of head word to indicate the shift.
READING RECOMMENDATIONS
The Harry Potter series by J.K. Rowling. An entire world is created here, with a multiple POV approach so sure and character voices so well-defined, it's got to be magic.
The Aubrey/Maturin series by Patrick O'Brian. These Napoleonic-era books chart a friendship between a ship's captain and a surgeon, replicating the voice of each of the dual protagonists with such authenticity that one critic insisted they must have been written by “Jane Austen's admiral brother.”
The Chronicles of Narnia series by C.S. Lewis. It wasn't till I was grown and rereading these books aloud to my own children that I realized how profoundly early exposure to these books had influenced my own voice. Playful, intense, emotional — no one does child POV as well as Lewis.
Ain't She Sweet by Susan Elizabeth Phillips. Phillips is a master at juxtaposing multiple POV and character dialogue, and she somehow manages to make even the snobbish homecoming queen sympathetic.
Martian Time-Slip Philip K. Dick. The invariably interesting Dick uses multiple POV to explore schizophrenia and its connections to “normal” thought.
Big Trouble by Dave Barry. Humor columnist Barry often uses multiple POV to juxtapose male POV with female POV for comic effect. This novel also uses multiple POV to show the chaos of modern Florida.
A Tale of Two Cities by Charles Dickens. This famous novel uses a combination of multiple and single POV to show the doubling of two cities, two nations, and two men in love with the same woman. The late scene where Sidney Carton goes to the guillotine is intensely tragic due to the tight POV.
part three
the master
CLASS
INDIVIDUALIZING POV 9
Now that I've explained the “macro” aspects of POV, it's time to get micro: actually getting into your characters' perceptions and their individual ways of describing the world and events. Just as characters have individual voices in dialogue, they have individual viewpoints, too. The unspoken thoughts of the character narrating the scene — the POV character — should reflect his or her distinctive personality, voice, and worldview. Creating convincing and engaging viewpoints involves understanding how the elements of POV and character interact, how POV reflects the unique character, and how this is developed within the scene. You can also use a character's POV to set up that character's journey in the story, her self-image, or what she needs to overcome.
