Forget Me Not: A Lesbian Romance, page 20
wouldn’t have Dallas here beside her. They’d have to figure
things out, but that was a classic case of easier said than done.
She had her whole family here in Topeka- at least her
immediate family. She had her friends here. She didn’t really
care about her job. She’d be willing to change it in a heartbeat,
but she’d have to figure out a way to support herself. She’d
also have to deal with her condo, which she really liked since
she and her family put all that hard work into it, and deal with
changing states including all the paperwork for her car, her
driver’s license, her insurance, everything. It was totally
overwhelming when she thought about it like that.
She thought about Dallas moving back, but Quinn
knew that it would be hard for Dallas unless her parents came
with her. Dallas didn’t have siblings. Her parents were pretty
much the only family she had and Quinn would never ask
Dallas to abandon them. Dallas had said that her parents had
good jobs. The chances of them leaving their home and their
careers, even if they were probably getting to that point where
they might think about retirement, was probably quite slim.
“Are you thinking about all the logistics?” Dallas
asked.
“Yeah.” Dallas glanced at the GPS and made a left
turn. “Are you?”
“Kind of. I’m trying not to. I’m trying not to have to
think about what it’s going to feel like when I’m gone and
we’re in separate states.”
“It will just feel like a computer screen. That’s all. It
won’t be lonely if we can see each other and talk to each
other.” Quinn was talking a lot braver than she actually felt.
“We did manage to go ten years before this. A few months
should be easy.”
“I think that might make it harder.”
Quinn gripped the wheel. She paid attention to the
traffic moving in front of her and pretended to be far more
interested in the GPS directions that she actually was.
“The good news is,” Dallas said, sensing that their
conversation wasn’t making anything easier for either of them,
“is that I have lots of leave time saved up. I hardly ever take
any holidays or sick days or anything, so I can come back here
more often. I’ll just watch for seat sales.”
“And you can obviously stay with me, so you wouldn’t
have to pay for a hotel. And you wouldn’t need to get a rental.
I could drive you around or you could use my car.”
Dallas nodded. “Sounds like a plan.” She decided to
change the subject while they were ahead. “So. What kind of
music does your friend’s band play?”
“Honestly, I’m not even sure. I think it might be jazz,
but it could also be classical. Country? I don’t know. I’m a
terrible friend, obviously. I just never go out when I get invited
because I hardly ever have anyone to go with. Everyone is
always busy and uh- when I’ve been with- err- other people,
dating that is- no one ever wanted to go.”
“Well, I’m glad I can be the first. That makes it extra-
special, I think.”
It only took another fifteen minutes to get to the pub.
The place was larger than Quinn thought it would be. The
windows were all stained glass, and the inside was lit with a
combination of industrial looking ceiling lights and pot lights
overhead. The tables were solid wood with iron legs and the
chairs matched. The place had that modern vibe where
everything was warehousey looking. The building itself was
done in brick with a black sign hanging over the door. It was
supposed to look old, but it was obvious that it was just a
façade on the front. Still. The place was nice and the gentle
hum of conversation, the warm wood floors and good lighting,
and the friendly servers made it feel comfortable and homey.
Dallas ordered a glass of raspberry ale, but Quinn stuck
with soda since she was driving.
“The band hasn’t started yet,” Dallas said. She picked
up the single laminated sheet that served as the menu. “We
made it on time.”
“Yes. They go on at six-thirty and it’s only five-thirty.
They’ll probably come in soon and start setting up.”
“Right.” Dallas flipped the menu across the table and
pointed. “I’m starving and there’s a ton of things that look
good here. Want to split it?”
“Yes! I’m starved too.”
When Quinn thought about how she’d worked up that
appetite, she had to put her hand up to her mouth to stop from
giggling. She felt so happy. Happier than she’d been in years
and years. She picked up her menu instead of thinking about
how that feeling couldn’t last forever. Maybe it couldn’t
exactly, but with hard work and some ingenuity, it could grow
and change. Quinn decided to stick with thinking about that.
Looking forward, even if it was a scary, messy, haphazard sort
of direction.
She flipped up her menu and browsed it quickly. “Oh
my God, I see what you mean. Pizza fries. Quesadillas. Cherry
meatballs?”
“Pumpkin cheesecake…”
“Garlic sticks with parmesan cheese.”
“Peach pie.”
“We should just order it all.”
“Oh god. The portions look massive.” Dallas motioned
with her head to the table beside them where a couple who
looked like they were out on a date was eating. The lady had a
salad and the bowl took up half the freaking table. Her date
was working away at a massive steak.
“You’re right.” Quinn felt like giggling again. The
giddiness had to be happy bubbles. She felt like a giant bottle
of champagne, ready to bubble over if she was uncorked and
shaken. Or maybe it was just uncorked. Just went to show how
little she knew about champagne.
“Should we get two things and split it? And two
desserts.”
“We could order dessert first. They do look amazing.”
“Aren’t there rules about that?”
“Nope. Not since we turned eighteen. We’re adults
now. We can eat dessert first if we want.”
“Okay. I’d like to try the pumpkin cheesecake.”
“And I’ll get the peach pie.”
“You hate peaches.”
“No I don’t.” Quinn did, but those were the two things
Dallas mentioned and even though she didn’t like peaches and
she actually wasn’t a fan of pumpkin either, she was willing to
take one for the food team. “I love peaches.”
“Since when?”
“Since- uh- I don’t know. Tastes change, I guess.”
“You don’t like pumpkin either.”
“But it’s cheesecake. I’m sure it’s delicious.”
“We can get something else.”
“Nope. I want to try those.”
Dallas stared at her skeptically. “Okay, well, you pick
the main dishes then. I’ll leave it up to you. I’m not fussy. I’ll
eat anything.”
“Since when?”
“Tastes change.” Dallas winked at her.
Quinn remembered that Dallas hated mushrooms. She
wasn’t a big fan of onions either, and aside from garlic toast,
she hated the stuff. She chose her dishes with care and when
their server came around, they placed their orders. The guy
didn’t even bat an eye about them ordering dessert first.
As they were settling back to wait for their food, Quinn
spotted her friend, dressed up in a bright purple jump suit, and
her band start to file in. She smiled and waved and Jenny
waved and grinned back, even though she was surprised to see
Quinn there.
Dallas reached across the table and took Quinn’s hand.
She left it there, their palms pressed up against each other.
Quinn wondered if their life lines were touching. She knew
nothing about any of that, but at the moment, that’s what she
was thinking. She wondered what her life line said. That was
the major one, wasn’t it? What did Dallas’ say? If they’d had
their palms read years ago, could whoever was doing it have
predicted this for them? If someone read it now, what would
they say?
They’d say something amazing. They’d say that hardly
anything lasts anymore, but this will. They’d say something
about destiny.
Quinn clung to those thoughts. Those hopes. Those
dreams that she’d once thought were over forever.
Danica had asked her if she was still in love with
Dallas. Quinn hadn’t really known how to answer that. Her
first instinct was to laugh it off or scoff at her sister or correct
her. Say something about love taking a lifetime to mature.
About how she couldn’t know after just a few days with Dallas
and one heck of an uncertain future coming up. She thought
about those lifelines again. She was pretty sure that if she did
get her palm read at any time- when they were best friends,
when they started dating, at any point in those years after
Dallas was gone, or right now, it would say the same thing.
That Quinn Smyth loved Dallas Tenison.
Chapter 23
Dallas
Saying goodbye to Quinn was probably the hardest thing
that Dallas had ever done. It was even harder than the first
time.
She didn’t want Quinn to have to come to the airport
with her. She had to return the rental car anyway, so she didn’t
need a ride. She’d woken up before Quinn that morning and
just enjoyed being in bed with her, even though Quinn was
still asleep. She savored all those fleeting moments that she
knew she’d never take for granted again. When she woke up
tomorrow, she’d be alone at her place, in her own bed. Alone.
Without Quinn. She’d only be able to call her or video chat
with her and it wouldn’t be the same.
Thinking about it really hurt, so Dallas finally woke Quinn
up and they made breakfast together. They were both pretty
quiet and after they were done eating, they sat together on
Quinn’s couch, just staring out the front window.
“I’m going to have to go pretty soon,” Dallas said in the
smallest voice. “I’m going to have to get my bag from the
hotel and check out there. I should have done it yesterday, but
I wasn’t sure about coming here. I didn’t want to just
assume…”
“For sure. I understand.”
“I wish I could have got a later flight.”
Quinn sighed heavily. “I know. Me too. I wish you didn’t
have to get on a flight at all.”
“I can second that.”
“But it’s going to be okay, right?” Quinn set her hand
tentatively on Dallas’ and Dallas only had to half force a
smile.
“Yes. It’s going to be fine. I have holidays saved up.
There’s weekends. The regular holidays that people take off
work anyway. We have time. We’ll have lots of time. I’ll call
you every single day. I promise. Maybe more than once a day.”
Quinn laughed. “Okay. We can talk about boring things
even if we don’t have anything else to say. I’ll put it on video
and you can watch me do dishes or clean the house.”
“You can see my cat, Whiskers, when I get home. He loves
video chatting.”
“Yes. I’m excited to see him.”
“I’ll show you my plants. I’m kind of a crazy plant lady.”
“I like plants.”
“I’ll walk around my condo and show you everything so
you know what it looks like. I could even go to some of my
favorite spots and video you so that you can see them.”
“That would be really cool.”
Dallas didn’t know what else to say. She wanted to make
plans. To make promises. More promises. She wanted to look
down that road and tell Quinn that she had zero doubts that
they’d make it, no matter how hard it was, but that was hard to
do. She didn’t want to scare Quinn away and she didn’t want
to sound like one of those clingy, really crazy, overly attached
people who raced into everything.
Or maybe it was just hard to find the exact right thing to
say when there wasn’t anything that she could say that would
make leaving any easier, even with all the technology, even
with all their hopes, even with all the promises. Leaving this
way was the best way to leave that Dallas could have
imagined, but it was still so hard.
“I- yeah. You should call me tonight. When your plane
lands.”
“I’ll call you from the airport too, before I get on it.”
“Okay.”
Dallas squeezed Quinn’s hand. “We’ll figure it out. I
promised that, and I’m going to promise it to you again,
because I truly believe it. The time will go fast.”
“Yes.”
“You have to come to Tampa. It’s amazing. It’s so pretty.”
“For sure. I have to meet Whiskers sometime, don’t I?”
Dallas grinned. “Yes. He’ll want to meet you for sure. If
you bring a bag of cat treats and a catnip mouse, he’ll be your
friend forever.”
“I’ll remember.”
They clung to each other’s hands. The silence crept up
between them again. Dallas didn’t want to check her phone,
but she had to shift it on the couch’s armrest so that it turned
on. She was cutting it close as it was. She really had to go.
Quinn knew it too. “I’ll walk you to the door.” She
reluctantly removed her hand and stood.
When they reached the door, they just stood there.
“Come here,” Quinn said, caving first. She threw herself at
Dallas and they hugged tightly.
Somehow, they both managed not to cry. Dallas knew that
she could do that later. As in, a few minutes later, in her car on
the way back to the hotel. Probably at the hotel. Back in the
car on the way to the airport. Likely in the airport bathroom.
Probably on the plane. Certainly when she got back home to
her own place.
Quinn kissed Dallas and Dallas kissed her back. Fiercely.
Protectively. Lovingly. They had that final moment, that
moment that she wished she could stretch out into a thousand
years, and then she had to say goodbye and step out the door.
Quinn stood in the open doorway, watching as Dallas got
into her car and pulled away. Dallas stuck her hand out the
window and waved and Quinn waved back madly.
She watched for as long as she could, until she had to turn
out of the condo complex and onto the main street. Even still,
Dallas’ eyes flicked to the rear-view mirror more than once.
She felt the tears coming and let them. She brushed them away
as they fell, hoping her eyes wouldn’t be all swollen and red
when she got to the airport.
This time she might be leaving with the promise of coming
back, of being with Quinn, but she was still leaving a huge
piece of her heart back there with Quinn. This time it was a
happy sort of farewell. It was probably the best goodbye, but
like she’d thought before, it was still a goodbye and that really,
really hurt.
Dallas couldn’t wait to get to the airport to call Quinn. If
she had to go back home, she couldn’t wait to get there, just so
she could see Quinn over video.
She swiped away the last of her tears and focused on the
road. On getting to the hotel. To the airport, Back home. On
