I, Mistress, page 1
Copyright © 2014 by Alex Tempera
All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any means without the prior written permissions of the author, except by a review who may quote brief passages in a review to be printed in a newspaper, magazine, or journal.
This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, businesses, places, events and incidents are either the products of the author’s imagination or used in a fictitious manner. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, or actual events is purely coincidental.
Cover Illustration Copyright © 2014
Cover design by Alex Tempera
I always thought I had this demon inside me. This dark side that I wasn’t supposed to have. Something that I had to hide from others. Women are perceived to be something … the weaker sex. Submissive. Dependent. By men. By Women.
That is not me. I discovered that being independent was one step toward having a satisfying life, but there was a difference from being independent and also being in control. There was also a difference from being in control and being bossy. I found my control. My calling. My total need for domination and no, I didn’t plan on ruling the world. Just my own needs, wants, and desires.
I’m on a personal journey to find not only myself, but the submissive that meets my needs. My wants. My desires.
The ultimate control is the one you have over yourself.
“Imagine for a moment if you will what it feels like to be completely accepted for who you are. Finding one person who will not judge you or ridicule you is invaluable.” --
Dr. Charley Ferrer (2013)
BDSM The Naked Truth
I am Angelica Ralston. I am a CEO and editor of my magazine. I’m a controlling, powerful woman who worked my way up from nothing in order to be successful. My life is about work and play. Yes, I love to play. I have three submissives, each one trying to be the one that will get me to keep them and do away with the others. Get me to fall in love with one of them. Fat Chance in Hell. Or is it? Yes, I’m a Mistress. No, I’m not a Dominatrix. I’m a Mistress. Yes, there is a difference. This, is my story.
I SAT BEHIND my desk and let my fingers continue to type. I had to meet this damn deadline. I was the boss, but I set my own deadlines. The magazine had to get out and I had to finalize the layout. I was the CEO and Editor of my own magazine, Independence. It wasn’t a political magazine, but a woman’s magazine. A magazine for any woman.
My tired eyes reviewed the final document and I clicked on post. That was the button that sent the approval to my marketing editor. I loved my magazine and I worked very hard to keep it running. It has been a very successful Boston magazine for the past 10 years and I just recently got an offer to help make it national. I kept staring at the proposal. It sat on the edge of my desk and my eyes would divert to it. I had until the end of a month to make a decision. I’ve browsed it but wasn’t impressed, and even a little worried about it, but somehow, I had a feeling it would work out and would change my life. I think. Not that my life needed changing. It was fine the way it was. Totally in control.
I looked up as Mae walked into the room. “Mae, what is it?”
Mae, my other editor and my best friend in the entire world, dropped down in the chair. She crossed her legs and I noticed her black boots that were tied up her legs. “He called again.”
I snickered lightly. “Nice boots. A little much for the office, huh?”
“I like these and I had to break them in. I’m about ready to go barefoot,” she laughed. “Four inches kill my damn feet.”
“Well, they match your outfit. So, you said he called again. Who’s he?”
“Fucking Avery Smythe,” she sighed, twirling her vibrant red curls on her finger.
“Oh, and he wants what with you?” I leaned forward and gently tapped my gold pen on my blotter.
“He’s calling me at work. Can you believe that?”
“I thought you had an agreement,” I sighed.
“Oh, yeah, but, Ang, what the hell am I going to do?”
“Have you figured it out yet? Do you even know? You did both sides.”
“He decided and he wants me to decide, like yesterday,” she tapped her long red fingernail on her chin.
“Has the other one bothered you lately?”
“Tim? No, I haven’t heard from him and I don’t want to. Ang, please, can we drop it, unless you’ve heard from him?”
“No threats in a while, but it’s when someone is quiet that we must be on the lookout.”
Mae sighed. “I know. I know. I just want to live my life. I can’t be worried he’s around every corner.”
“Well any way, do you want to do more playing?”
“With you? Maybe,” she sighed. “Maybe we should go to the club tonight.”
“Well, I do have a lot of work to do, but I think I could fit it in. We always have an amazing time at Club Twine. I’ll have to call one of my subs to come out and play,” I smiled, as there was a knock on my open door. “Elaine?”
“I’m sorry to bother you both, but there’s a man here to see you.”
“Oh? I assume he has a name?”
He appeared in the doorway behind Elaine. “Yes, actually, I do,” his voice was deep and low. His smile reached all the way up to his onyx black eyes. “Loxias Panagakos,” his accent was definitely Greek, but clear as if he were born in America.
“I’m not familiar,” I walked around my desk. I noticed that Elaine and Mae’s eyes were focused on this sexy man, dressed sharply in a black Italian suit. I extended my hand. “Angelica. Angelica Ralston, what can I do for you, Mr. Panagakos?”
“Lox, please,” he smiled.
“Lox?” I smiled and turned to the other two women. “If you’ll excuse us.”
Mae followed Elaine out of the office and closed the door behind her. I could just imagine the thoughts racing through their heads. Yes, a sexy man in my office. Yeah, and they had naughty thoughts about him but probably not as bad as the ones I’m trying to push in the back of my head.
He should be kneeling at my feet. Oh, the fucking thought of that. If it happen, I’d be pleased beyond belief. He looks like he could be an exceptional kneeler. Fuck. Stop this. Be professional. Focus, Angelica, focus. “Please, have a seat,” I pointed to the chair in front of my desk and then walked to my chair. I noticed his manners as he waited for me to sit and then he seated himself, as he unbuttoned his suit jacket. I liked that in a sub. Wait. No, it was manners. Not submission. Or was it? The thought trickled in my head of this Greek god kneeling at my feet, again. Stop. He’s not your sub. He’s … who is he? “I’m sorry, why are you here?”
He eyed the proposal on my desk. “I’m the CEO of Hercules Publications. That is my proposal on your desk.”
“Oh, I have to the end of the month to give you an answer. Why are you here? Have things changed?”
“I’m in town on business and I thought I’d meet you in person. If now is not a good time, then I can reschedule.”
I crossed my legs, looked him in the eye, and noticed they diverted slightly to the ground. Interesting. “Mr. Panagakos, I’ll review this proposal. It wasn’t proper for you to just show up at my office. Now, since you’re here, I’ll make an exception. Just this once. Any further business, an appointment is scheduled. I’m a very busy woman.”
“I apologize. I was on my way to my hotel when my driver passed your building. I’ll never make that mistake again.”
“Good,” I smiled. “I’ll have Elaine bring us some coffee. Would you like some?”
I picked up my phone and pushed the button for Elaine’s direct line. “Coffee, please,” I said.
“Yes, ma’am,” she said and then hung up. A few seconds later, she was opening the door, balancing a tray with a coffee pot and two cups. “Sir, how do you take your coffee?”
“Black is fine, and please, don’t call me sir,” he sighed.
“Oh, I apologize, Mr. Panagakos,” she set the tray on the table and walked out of the room.
I stood up and watched as he stood. He seemed very confident and yes, he was handsome. That tall-dark-stranger kind of handsome. I couldn’t think of such things anymore. I didn’t get involved with anyone, not even my subs. Relationships were too much work, and subs, were subs. They obeyed. They pleased me and I took care of them, as best I could. I looked forward to tonight at the club. I needed it. I poured us both a cup of coffee and then pointed to the chair. “Please, sit. So, I did review the proposal, but I have some concerns.”
He waited until I sat down and then, he sat down. “Is that why you haven’t made up your mind?”
“Yes, to be honest, I worked my ass off to make this magazine what it is. It’s about women, independent women. Women who aren’t afraid to take control and dominate, but also who aren’t afraid to be soft and gentle either. Gay, straight, bi-sexual. Transgender. It doesn’t matter.”
“That would never be taken away. The truth is, my company wants to expand its readership. Yes, we’re Global, and our main office is in Greece, but we have two offices here in the U.S.”
“I’m aware. New York City and San Francisco. I’ve done my homework,” I sighed. “This proposal seems like you’re trying to take over. I’ll not allow that.”
He raised an eyebrow. “You must be reading it wrong.”
I slammed my hand down on the table and stood up. “I don’t know what you think you’re trying to pull with me. I’m not a stupid woman. I know what it means when your proposal says things like …” I walked over to my desk and opened the folder with the proposal in it. “Reorganization of staff resources. Reconcile layouts.” I gritted my teeth as I tried to handle my anger. I knew how to do that. I was always in control of myself. My emotions.
He stood up and took a long deep breath. “I apologize. The interpretation of those phrases is incorrect.”
“The hell with this. Unless this proposal is rewritten with words that are clear and concise, I’ll have to turn your proposal down.” I tossed the proposal in the trashcan.
“Can’t we sit down and work through this together?” he asked. “That way everything is clear between the both of us?”
“That would be acceptable,” I sighed, eyeing my watch.
“Do you think we could finish this now?”
I shook my head. “No, I have plans for the evening. Now, if you’re serious about this, we can meet on Monday, at 10. I’ll have Elaine rearrange my schedule.”
He stood up. “Monday?”
“It’s the best I can do. I have a lot of work to do this weekend,” I explained. “I’ll be here all weekend and if I have time, I’ll review this again.” I pulled the folder out of the trash.
He extended his hand. “Monday, at 10.”
“Mr. Panagakos, how long are you staying in town?”
“I’m here for good. Well, I’m moving myself to Boston,” he sighed. “I’m staying at the Plaza Hotel until my brownstone is finished.”
“A brownstone?” I smiled.
“Yes, I have dual-citizenship because I was born in America; my parents were on vacation in New York when I decided to be born. I’ll see myself out and see you at 10 on Monday.”
I nodded and sat down as he walked out of the office. I sipped my coffee and swung my chair around to stare out the window. I needed this night out tonight. Definitely. I needed to release … with my sub.
I STRUTTED INTO the main room of Club Twine from the long hallway and walked over to the bar. I just finished preparing my reserved private room for myself and my sub. I wore my black leather bustier underneath my all black lace dress. The only thing my feet couldn’t stand was too high of stilettos. I wore black open-toed three-inch spiked heels. I sat down at the bar and crossed my legs.
Jack, wearing the standard black leather vest and leather pants uniform for the club, walked over and smiled. “White wine, Mistress?” he asked.
“Yes, thank you,” I smiled. “Is Alec or Dane here?”
“In the back. They’ll be out shortly,” Jack nodded and walked away. He returned with my glass of white wine.
“Thank you,” I sighed. “Oh, has Richard arrived yet?”
“No, Mistress, not yet,” he nodded and then walked away.
I looked at my watch and sighed. “Late,” I whispered.
Mae walked over to me and smiled. “May I join you?”
“Of course. So is Avery here?” I sipped my wine and faced her.
“I don’t know. I have to call him Master or something here. I don’t know if I’m ready for that. I’ve only been your sub, and then with Dane, but he’s gay, well, bi or something. He’s not really into me.”
“Well, he says he’s gay one minute and straight the next, but I think he’s flexible,” I laughed. “Mae, it’s all right. You have two options,” I smiled. I knew she needed my reassurance.
“Which are?” Mae raised an eyebrow as Jack brought her over a glass of wine. “Thank you.”
Jack nodded slightly and walked away.
“He knows me?” she smiled.
“He knows me,” I chuckled.
“Yes, Mistress,” she said with ease.
“No, you’re not my sub anymore, Mae. You’re my best friend and today, we’re gonna find you a new Master. You know you want a male, right?”
“Yes. No offense, Mistress,” she giggled.
“Bitch,” I laughed.
“Yes, I am, thank you, Mistress,” she laughed as she sipped her wine. “So, where’s your pet?”
I looked at my watch again. Yes, Richard was late. I knew it and she knew it. Dammit! I hated tardiness. “I don’t know. He was supposed to be here,” I scanned the club and realized that he wasn’t here unless he hid his eyes behind a mask.
“Maybe he changed his mind. You did call him, right?”
“Yes, but if he’s working on a case or whatever he does at the police station, he may not be able to come. He always tells me, even if it’s a quick text, that’s he can’t make it. It’s OK; he’s just a lovely play toy right now.”
“Excuse me, Ma’am,” I heard a voice from behind me.
I turned toward the masked man, whose sculpted bare chest drew my eyes into him. “Um, it’s Mistress,” I said, firmly.
“I apologize, Mistress,” he kneeled instinctively at my feet.
I heard that voice before but I couldn’t quite place it but that chest is something I would’ve remembered. “I’m not your Mistress. Just a Mistress. On your feet,” I commanded. “I am Mistress Angel. Are you someone’s sub?”
“No, Mistress, I don’t belong to anyone, yet,” he rose to his feet in one graceful swoop.
Now, this was amazing. Even my most experienced subs have not been able to be so graceful with a rise. Only Mae ever rose to her feet like a ballerina, because she used to be one, many years ago. This wasn’t a ballerina rise, but a swift, flexible stunning rise without the simplest of wobbles or loss of balance.
“Permission to speak freely, Mistress?” he asked.
I looked at Mae, who smiled. “Here, take my seat,” she offered. “Ang, I see Master Avery. I think I’ll at least talk to him.”
“Don’t forget to ask for permission.”
“Yes, I remember everything you taught me,” she walked off in the crowd toward the tall, thin-but-trim blonde. She liked the blondes.
I focused on this interestingly submissive man with the light caramel sculpted chest. “Take a seat,” I said as I pointed to Mae’s chair. “And,
“I know it wasn’t right for me to approach you, but Master Dane pointed me in your direction, Mistress,” he looked over my shoulder.
I turned and Dane lifted up his glass of beer and smiled. Damn him. Dane was one of my oldest and dearest friends. He and Alec were best friends and they owned this BDSM club. Alec was straight and Dane was flexible, as he called it. They were both Masters, not just here at the club, but also in their own lives. Dane was an attorney, who not only trained submissives and other Dominants, but he had three 24/7 slaves at home. Alec was also an attorney, he and Dane were partners in the law Firm. He didn’t have his own subs, he just trained them. He did have a girl friend, well, many of them. Alec was a whore, but he preferred the company of subs. He said vanilla girlfriends just didn’t understand a good spanking.
I focused back on this masked man. “Why did you wish to approach me?” I drank down my wine and nodded to Jack, who brought me another glass. “Wine?”
“Yes, please,” he nodded. I could see that his black eyes were diverted to the floor.
“Two, Jack,” I smiled.
Jack placed a glass of wine in front of me and then the masked-man. He nodded slightly and walked away toward the end of the bar.
“I’m looking for a Mistress. I’m new in town and I talked to the owners of this club.”
“If you’re new in town, how did you know about this club?” I asked.
“I’ve been here before. An associate of mine is also a member. I just talked to the owners about becoming a member. I heard you were open to having more than one sub.”
“Yes, that is true,” I sipped my wine and then gently swirled it around the glass.
“May I ask how many do you have, Mistress?”
“Well, I thought it was three, but now I’m not so sure,” I sighed. “I only have subs here to play with.”