World Warden, page 32
And shame.
He stopped walking. After a few steps, Samantha must have realized he was not following because she stopped and looked back.
“Is something wrong?” she asked.
Oscar shook his head, although he was unsure whether Samantha could see him clearly in the tunnel gloom.
“In that case, keep going. I do not want to be in this place longer than I have to.”
Oscar started walking again, keeping his eyes on the ground. His sense of guilt and shame only increased when Samantha was nice to him, such as when she shared the last bit of water from her pack right before exiting the tunnel mouth. She had even taken his hand once or twice during the descent in dangerous places to make sure he wouldn’t hurt himself.
And I was a coward. Again.
Coming out into the open air and the fresh breeze wafting from the ocean was like waking up from a long nightmare. The sun was still relatively high in the sky, and Oscar was surprised when his link told him that it was barely a couple of hours after noon. His legs were shaky with exhaustion, and his knees threatened to buckle under his own weight after every step he took. The straps of the backpack he carried chafed, and he was certain he had never sweated so much in his entire life. He was dusty, and he ached all over. He felt like he had gone through a grueling marathon of a workout.
His mind flashed back to Dresde pouncing on him. He stopped walking again.
“Is anything the matter?” Samantha asked impatiently, stopping as well.
She turned around, and Oscar was able to see, quite clearly, the awful red welt on her cheek where Dresde had struck her. He realized he had already seen her hurt like this once before, and it made him mad at the same time it filled the pit of his stomach with even more caustic shame.
Oscar hung his head low. “I’m sorry, Samantha.”
She took a moment to reply, almost as if surprised. “Sorry? What for?”
“I…,” Oscar began. “I ran away.”
He shut his eyes tight as if to block the memory that clawed at the back of his mind. He saw himself running away like a coward and leaving Samantha to face Dresde’s attack on her own. He recalled his own panic, the way he had screamed. He had tried to be brave, and it had all been for nothing.
Again.
Samantha stepped closer and placed her hand on Oscar’s shoulder. After a few moments, Oscar looked up into her eyes.
“There is nothing to be sorry about,” she said, and her voice lost the hard edge it usually had.
“I was a coward,” Oscar confessed, and the words burned as they came out. “I left you there when she attacked. I’m so sorry.”
Samantha let go of his shoulder and looked up at the sky, appearing pensive. “Not many people would have done what you did.”
“I didn’t do anything.”
“Are you certain? I know how terrible her mind can be. I am used to it, and even I find it hard to resist it sometimes. This was only the second time you spoke to her, and you tried to stand your ground.”
“But—”
“Running away from her is not cowardice,” Samantha interrupted. “It is common sense. What could you have done? No creature on this planet can match her power. Even her sister perished under her talons. Besides, I believe it is I who should be apologizing to you.”
Oscar furrowed his brow, confused. “I’m sorry?”
Samantha sighed, turning around. She walked downhill, and Oscar followed, keeping pace with her.
“I used you as bait, young male,” she said to him, not meeting his eyes.
“You mean what Dresde said?”
“Yes. I knew she would be interested in you. I knew she would probably fixate on you, trying to terrorize you or getting you to admire her, vain as she is. Things went better than expected, in fact. She even showed you her clutch, and for that time, crucially, she was distracted.”
“You used me to distract her?”
“I did, and I am sorry. I deliberately put your life at risk, but it was the only way.”
Oscar remembered how Samantha had been about to throw her spear at the Flower, an instant before Dresde had frozen her in her tracks.
“You wanted to destroy the Flower.” Oscar said, voicing his realization.
Samantha nodded. “I tried. I had thrown my spear at it several times already before she noticed me, but to no avail. It simply bounced off the black petals each time. I’d also tried to reach it with my hands, but it dangles too high up. When she discovered me, I was trying to impale the vines above it instead.”
“That was really dangerous.”
“Yes, but I had to try. I had often wondered whether harming the Flower was worth it, but I only knew for sure that it is her one weakness after what you told me. Sizzra was incapacitated when her Flower was ripped from its resting place, was she not?”
“Yeah. That’s what Eli told me. It took her decades to be able to move again, I think.”
“Exactly. So if I could but rip that Flower from the vines that hold it, she would be powerless. We would be free.”
“That’s why she freaked out,” Oscar said. “She knew that’s what you were trying to do.”
“Oh yes. Make no mistake, young male. She may have let us go, but she does not forget. Even now she must be plotting the punishment she will give me. I can almost feel her amusement and anger through the link we share. I doubt she will ever let me go back to the eyrie after what happened today. I had one chance to save my family, and I-I failed.”
Her shoulders sagged, and Oscar felt sorry for the enormous weight Samantha evidently carried. She seemed utterly dejected.
“You could have told me,” he said. “About the plan, I mean. I would’ve helped. I can be really annoying and distracting when I want to, and I would’ve kept her busy even longer.”
Samantha met his eyes and gave him a tired-looking smile as she nodded. It was the first sincere friendly expression Oscar had ever seen from her.
“I see that now. I misjudged you. I thought you were not to be trusted, that you would betray us the moment you could benefit from it so that you could save yourself. I have been told this is how strangers often are, and you are the first stranger I have come to know in my entire life. You are not like that, however. If only I had trusted you, things would have been different. I will not make that mistake again.”
Oscar felt like he should say something, but he couldn’t think of anything smart or witty, so instead he simply nodded in a jerky way and smiled.
They walked the rest of the way home in silence, but it was a companionable sort of quiet. Oscar was almost sorry when they finally reached the house.
“I will go in and let them know we are safe,” Samantha said. “You can go ahead to the river if you want to take a bath.”
“Do I,” Oscar replied. “I don’t think I’ve ever been this dirty in my life.”
“I will catch up shortly and bring you some clean clothes.”
“Okay, sounds good,” he said, taking the hint that maybe Samantha wanted some alone time with her family.
He dropped his backpack on the porch and went straight to the river. When he sat down by the bank to peel off his shoes and socks, he groaned with more aches than he could count.
“I hope I never have to climb that volcano again,” he grumbled to himself.
He took off all his clothes and arranged them as neatly as he could on a nearby rock. He then slipped into the water, which was bubbly and warm.
It was blissful. He sighed with contentment and swam forward for a bit. He took a big breath and then allowed himself to sink underwater until his feet touched the soft sandy bottom of the riverbed. He stayed down as long as he could and then kicked back up to the surface. For a few minutes afterward, he simply floated, enjoying the sensation of the warm current caressing his skin and easing away the aches and pains of the day. In particular the water did wonders to wash away the soreness on his shoulders and back. He massaged his legs and feet for a while, and although he had not brought any soap with him, he still scrubbed his hair and rubbed his skin until he was sure that he had gotten rid of all the grit and dust from the volcano. When he was done, he relaxed in the water, anchoring himself to the bank with one hand.
A faint swish of steps on tall grass alerted him to the fact that Samantha was coming mere moments before she arrived.
“I brought you clothes,” she said.
Oscar flip-flopped awkwardly for a moment and hurriedly made sure his lower body would be relatively invisible underwater. Once again, he was painfully aware of the fact that he was completely naked with Samantha right in front of him.
“Um, thanks,” he said, trying not to blush. He knew he was failing.
“How is the water?” she asked, placing the pile of clothes she had brought on another rock.
“It’s amazing,” Oscar replied, wondering how he was going to get out of the water this time.
“Good. Here, soap.” Samantha tossed him a bar, which he caught with one hand. The other remained strategically fixed in position.
Samantha kicked off her shoes and started unbuttoning her shirt.
“Samantha?”
“Yes?”
“What are you doing?”
“Getting into the water,” she said matter-of-factly. “What else would I be doing?”
Oscar gulped and looked away when he realized Samantha was about to take off her shirt. He did his best to focus intensely on the bar of soap in his hand and used it to clean himself as fast as he could.
Splash.
“The water is amazing,” Samantha sighed from very close by.
Oscar gulped again.
“Could you pass me the soap, please?”
He shut his eyes tight and stretched out his arm behind him until Samantha took it.
“Thank you,” she said. “Is something wrong?”
“Um, uh… I’m done,” he replied. “Thanks for bringing me new clothes.”
“I hope they fit.”
“I’m sure they will!” Oscar said, trying not to sound shrill as he climbed out of the river. He toweled himself dry faster than he ever had in his entire life. Only when he had put on his new pants did he relax. He still dared not look at the river, though, and he put on his shirt in a hurry. He grabbed his dirty clothes as he set out. “See you back at the house!” he called.
“Okay,” Samantha said, sounding confused.
Oscar escaped and hid in the solar panel array for a while rather than go into the house. He was flustered and a little bit confused. A few minutes later, when he saw Samantha walking up the path, he experienced a weird fluttery sensation that he firmly told himself was indigestion.
He only walked up to the house after he was certain Samantha had already entered. He was nervous about going inside for some reason, but he also knew he couldn’t stay out by the array forever. He pushed the heavy door open and walked in.
“Here you are,” Samantha said. “I was wondering whether you had gotten lost.”
“I’m here,” he announced. Laurie, Ute, and Nadja were all in the kitchen. “Thank you for the clean clothes, by the way.”
Ute smiled at him and approached, holding her arms out. At first Oscar thought she was going to hug him, but she merely reached for the pile of dirty clothes he carried.
“Oh, sure,” he said awkwardly. “Thanks.”
“Sit down, both of you,” Nadja told them. “Tell us what happened over dinner.”
Oscar obeyed, taking his usual place at the table next to Laurie, who gave him an odd look.
“Hi,” Oscar said to her. “How’s the baby?”
If he could have kicked himself, he would have.
What kind of a question is that?
Surprisingly, though, Laurie merely nodded. “I am well, thank you. Or rather, we are well.” She glanced at her belly.
“That’s great,” Oscar replied. He had no idea what to say after that.
Fortunately, Nadja and Ute saved him from the situation by placing several plates of delicious-looking dishes in front of them. Samantha took a seat opposite Oscar and immediately reached for a seaweed wrap.
“Go ahead, eat,” Nadja said to him. “Laurie, you too. Ute and I will be with you in a minute.”
It was a bit early for dinner, but Oscar was so hungry that he didn’t care. He spent the next half an hour helping himself to anything within reach. His favorite was a savory soup made of the odd mushrooms that Samantha had risked so much to pick a couple of weeks back. The soup was thick and spicy, with a hint of something sweet that was unlike anything Oscar had tried up to that point.
“This is amazing,” he said when he was pouring himself another bowl. “Ute, you’re the best chef I know.”
Ute smiled at him.
Samantha did too.
Oscar was taken aback at the gesture and actually stopped what he was doing, his spoon in midair for a couple of seconds before he remembered he could move.
“I think it is time to tell you what happened,” Samantha said to the rest of them. “As we supposed, she was curious about the young male. She was even fully distracted for a few seconds.”
Laurie leaned forward, looking eager. “Then you were able to….” She gave Oscar a quick look, as if she didn’t trust herself to finish the sentence with him in earshot.
Samantha shook her head. “I was not able to take the Flower or hit it with my spear, no,” she replied.
Laurie scowled. “Sam, the male is right here.”
“Yes, and he should hear this,” she said firmly, looking also at Nadja and Ute. “We decided not to tell him about the plan, and it backfired. He could have entertained her for longer. Instead she realized what I was doing and stopped me before I could be successful. I failed, and I do not believe I will ever get another opportunity like this again.”
Laurie looked disappointed. Nadja appeared sad and reached across the table so she could hold one of Samantha’s hands in her own.
“It’s okay, Sam,” Nadja said to her.
“Dresde was very angry,” Samantha said quietly. Ute bunched her hands into fists when she heard the name spoken aloud. “I am sorry, Mama. However, I have started to think that all of this secrecy, all of this hiding, is what is keeping us trapped here. We should not be afraid to say her name. We should not be afraid to try and trust others.”
Laurie frowned. “We do not know whether this male here is trustworthy. He could—”
“Try to save my life?” Samantha cut in.
There was silence after her words.
“Yes,” Samantha continued. “Dresde was very angry, and she was going to hurt me. I know her better than any of you, and I know how impulsive she can be. She kills for fun in the heat of the moment and experiences no regret.
“The young male stood between her and me today. He tried to protect me and distracted her long enough for me to even attempt my attack on the Flower.”
Ute, Nadja, and Laurie all looked at Oscar at the same time.
“Is this true? Did you stand up to the wurl queen?” Nadja asked him.
“Uh, I mean, I tried, but then she attacked me and I ran away. It wasn’t my best moment, to be honest. I’m not sure I even did anything.”
“You did enough,” Samantha replied.
Both Nadja and Laurie fixed Oscar with long silent looks. It might have been Oscar’s imagination, but he thought he saw their expressions soften, particularly Laurie’s.
“I failed, but I still obtained valuable information,” Samantha informed everyone. “I confirmed what we have long suspected: Dresde cannot approach the Flower.”
Oscar remembered the very brief but clear flash of fear he had felt when Dresde had tried to pursue him close to the Flower. “You mean, that’s why we always stood near the center of the eyrie?”
“Yes. I assumed we would be safest there, even if the Flower itself is dangerous.”
“This is important,” Nadja said. “What else did you learn?”
“Threatening her eggs, as Laurie had proposed, will be ineffective,” Samantha replied. “The young male here can attest to this.”
“How so?” Laurie asked Oscar.
Once again, he felt as though he had been put on the spot. “Well, she doesn’t seem to care about them,” he said, remembering how Dresde had acted. “I actually think she crushed some of the eggs with a big rock when she was showing me her nest and everything. And she didn’t even care about the red egg.”
“The next queen,” Nadja said.
“Right,” Oscar agreed. “It was the same size as Sizzra’s egg, but red. It was just lying there, like she couldn’t be bothered to think about it.”
“Interesting,” Laurie commented. “So it appears our only option is the Flower.”
“Correct,” Samantha confirmed. “It is her only weakness.”
“But she will not allow you near it again,” Nadja pointed out.
“Perhaps,” Samantha said. “However, there may be a way, something we have not thought about. We should think.”
“We should also be careful,” Laurie told her. She looked worried. “This time you came back. Next time you may not be so lucky.”
“Another chance will come. I am sure of it,” Samantha proclaimed fiercely. She looked at each member of the table in turn. “And when it does, I will be ready. I will set us free—or die trying.”
Chapter 21. Reprieve
ELIAS DID everything he could not to fall off Narev’s back as the wurl swam with an incredible burst of speed, remaining on the surface of the water so Elias would be able to breathe. He was weak, dizzy, and it was only a few seconds before his arms started to tremble.
Can’t hold on much longer, he told the wurl.
Elias was not sure whether Narev even acknowledged his thought. There was another loud sound in the night, the same enormous spraying of water and a rush of air that was like a giant breathing out. Elias, utterly confused by the speed and the darkness and his own lightheadedness, began to slip out of consciousness. His grip on Narev’s neck slackened.
