Murder Under a Honey Moon, page 9
Mona answered, “Nothing for me. I’m waiting for my husband.”
“Off you go then. There’s a good chap,” Pugh said to the server.
Mona asked, “When’s the last time you’ve eaten, Mr. Pugh?”
Pugh thought for a moment. “I think I had breakfast, but I can’t be sure. It’s been such a whirlwind.” He leaned back in his chair after taking off his hat and putting it in his lap. He ran his hand through his unkempt dark hair.
Taking the initiative, Mr. Pugh said, “I hope you don’t hold our first meeting against me, Your Grace. I know I was a bit rough, but my first duty is to the ship. I had to be sure that you and your husband were on the up and up.”
“I understand, Mr. Pugh. The Duke and I realize you were only doing your duty, but is there any information you could pass our way?”
“I haven’t had much time,” Mr. Pugh confessed.
Mona felt Pugh was dodging her questions again. It was a habit of men not to discuss anything they deemed unpleasant with women. It irritated Mona so, but that was the way of the world. As usual, Mona shocked Mr. Pugh by saying, “Let’s start with the purser’s office. Any idea who poisoned the purser clerks?”
Mr. Pugh blanched. “Pardon?”
“The clerk I spoke to thinks he was slipped a Mickey Finn, just as I and Noel Coward were. I expect the other clerks, who were to report that evening shift, were also drugged. That’s why they didn’t show up for work. How many more were drugged that evening, Mr. Pugh?”
Mr. Pugh tugged uncomfortably at his collar, knowing that he had lost control of the narrative. Blast that woman! She was always getting the better of him. Hesitating, he spoke in a low voice, “This is strictly off the record, Your Grace, but the four clerks assigned to the purser’s office were just off their feed. Please keep that to yourself.”
Mona decided to put more pressure on Pugh. She was losing patience with the ship’s staff and especially Mr. Pugh. “You are telling me that the clerks got food poisoning, rather than someone giving them a Mickey Finn.”
Averting from Mona’s gaze, Mr. Pugh replied, “That’s what Dr. Bumble explained to my satisfaction.”
Mona rapid-fired two more questions. “Did they all have the same thing to eat? Did others on the ship get food poisoning as well?”
Mr. Pugh’s eyelids fluttered and the veins in his neck throbbed. “I have to stand by Dr. Bumble’s report.”
“Then did the clerks eat sea bass? Because that’s what I ate. Noel Coward had almost nothing to eat. How do you explain that?”
Mr. Pugh was emphatic. “I am going by Dr. Bumble’s report.”
“This Dr. Bumble. Have you worked with him long?” Mona asked.
“This is his first voyage with us.”
“So he’s new like the deceased bartender. It doesn’t strike you odd that he was at the captain’s table and then the purser’s office with six of us becoming ill. We all had powerful headaches.”
Mr. Pugh was digging in his heels. “Coincidence. Nothing more.”
Mona realized Mr. Pugh stuck to his unreasonable theories because he was exhausted. He couldn’t think straight anymore. Indeed, Mr. Pugh was someone left over from the Victorian age with silly notions of womanhood, but he wasn’t a stupid man. He was just fatigued.
Regardless, Mona pushed forward with accusations. Maybe something would stick to the wall and register with Mr. Pugh. “I expect my husband’s drink was tampered as well. He didn’t drink wine that night, but Mr. Coward and I did. I had only a few sips of my wine as did Coward. He was drinking something else that night. The clerk at the purser’s office had his tea tagged while it was sitting on the desk behind the counter. I think the clerk said it was you who locked up the office and went in search of the missing clerks. I wonder if they had terrible headaches in the morning like Mr. Coward, the purser, and I did.”
Mr. Pugh grew visibly defensive, neither confirming nor denying the events as described by Mona. “There were others at your table and they have not complained of being drugged and having headaches. Maybe the sea air does not agree with you, or you bumped your head during the hurricane.”
Mona spoke softly, “The others were not the targets. Unity Mitford has no money or jewels to speak of. Certainly not Mr. Wittgenstein. That leaves the captain and Dr. Bumble. I don’t think the captain would taint a passenger’s drink, do you?”
“I see that you and your husband could be targets, but why Mr. Coward?” Pugh asked.
Mona pulled her cape closer about her shoulders. “I’ve thought about that. Mr. Coward confided that he’s had small things nicked before while traveling. If one reads the papers, then one would be aware that Mr. Coward leads a very colorful life. Maybe a thief might think Mr. Coward carries letters from his paramours. It’s easy enough for a thief to blackmail a victim. I think there are multiple people working in concert on this ship for nefarious purposes.”
Holding up a hand signaling for Mona to stop speaking, Pugh decided to confide in her. “I’ve spoken with the maid and the steward who attend your suite. They have been with us for several years, and we have had no complaints about their service. I checked their quarters and also the stations where they work. There was no sign of your jewels.”
“They have keys to my suite?”
“Yes, they do, Your Grace, but they also have keys to Mrs. Tremayne’s suite and nothing of hers has been disturbed.”
Mona quickly replied, “Mrs. Tremayne’s jewelry is made from Victorian black jet and garnets—neither very valuable. Who else has keys to my suite?”
“Mr. Caruthers’ and the purser’s office each have a master set of keys.”
“So that means just about anyone on this ship could gain access to my stateroom.”
Mr. Pugh defended his position. “All keys are accounted for. I checked personally.”
“Who is the other man in the morgue, Mr. Pugh?”
Grasping that Mona knew more than she should, Mr. Pugh didn’t realize how much yet. He decided to bluff Mona again. “A passenger who had a heart episode during the storm.”
Mona gave Pugh a knowing smile. “Really? Then where is the body of the crewman who was patching the breach in the hull?”
Pugh gaped at Mona. How in the world did the duchess find out about that? “Please, Your Grace, don’t tell the passengers about that crewman. If they knew the other body in the morgue was a drowned crewman, it would panic them. A passenger who suffered a heart attack goes down better. It’s all we can do to keep this ship afloat at the moment.”
“That bad, eh?”
“Yes, Your Grace. It is that bad.”
“Isn’t a rescue ship coming?” Mona asked.
“She is coming, and we are trying to meet her, but the ocean is a very big place. Even with our coordinates, it would be easy to miss us. As soon as the sun sets, we will be launching flares.”
“How far away is she?”
“Just a few hours, but the sun is setting. It’s more difficult to locate a ship in the dark, and as you can observe, we are losing heat. Pretty soon the ship’s lights will be affected.”
A steward brought a pot of tea and a plate of cheese sandwiches, placing them on the table. Mona lifted a cup and poured steaming tea into it. “This should put some pluck in your walk again, Mr. Pugh.”
Although irritated with Mona’s uncompromising interrogation, Mr. Pugh was slightly embarrassed that a duchess was pouring tea for him. “Thank you, Your Grace. Please don’t bother.”
“It’s no bother to pour tea for the man who’s looking for my jewels. You know there’s a reward for anyone who finds the jewels—two hundred pounds.”
Mr. Pugh looked surprised. “This is the first I’ve heard of it.”
“His Grace and I want to keep it under wraps for now. If the general population heard of it, they’d be ripping this ship apart.” Mona pushed the plate of sandwiches toward Pugh. “But if we don’t find the jewels the day before we land at Southampton, we will release the offer to the crew and passengers at large.”
“If we get to Southampton,” Pugh murmured under his breath.
“What do you mean by that, Mr. Pugh? The rescue ship will reach us in a few hours. In fact, I spotted it before I dressed for dinner.”
Fed up with Mona’s aggressiveness, Mr. Pugh decided to give Mona a piece of information that would shock her. “Your Grace, what makes you think that ship heading toward us is the rescue ship? Pirates are known to roam these waters!”
21
“I wish I had my binoculars with me,” Robert remarked, peering through the porthole. “Do you think they will have the Jolly Roger flag flying?”
“This isn’t funny, Lord Bob. I knew something was wrong with that ship approaching from the south. It would make sense that a rescue ship would come from the north.”
“Might be one of those marauding pirate gangs coming from the coast of Africa,” Robert mused.
Mona wondered, “Maybe they homed in on our ship’s frequency and listened to the SOS messages going out?”
Pulling Mona close to his side, Robert said, “Your instincts are always correct, my dear, but there is nothing we can do about it. Let’s meet our guests for dinner and have a good meal. It might be our last for some time.”
Mona complained, “Ah, the British—stiff upper lip and all that.”
“We have a duty to perform, Mona. Let’s not get all jellied.”
“Who’s jelly? Not me, Lord Bob. My spine is straight. If there’s trouble, I’ve got my revolver.”
“Mona?” Robert said in a warning tone. “I know when you’re upset.”
“Well, I am mad about my honeymoon. So much for nesting in our room enjoying each other until the ship reached Southampton.”
“I’m disappointed, too, but there’s nothing we can do about it at the moment, so let’s hurry to the dining hall and have our dinner.”
Mona said, “I would appreciate it if you didn’t make it sound like the Last Supper.”
Grinning, Robert urged, “Let’s go, kiddo.”
Mona embraced Robert and kissed him passionately. “Let’s not, darling. I have the worst feeling in the world about that approaching ship.”
Robert tilted Mona’s chin with his finger and stared into her eyes. “What’s this?”
“I’m so troubled, Robert. Nothing is turning out as we planned.” Mona clung to Robert and refused to let him go.
“Mona, I’ve never known you to be so anxious before we got married. You had a little episode like this in Montana. I know you’re not afraid. What’s come over you?”
“I’ve never had so much at stake before,” she replied, pressing her face against his chest. “I’ve never had money-grubbing relatives after my hide nor enemies planning my downfall. It takes a toll after a while.”
Robert appeared concerned. “I’ve seen this in the war. You are experiencing fatigue—something similar to shell shock. In fact, I’ve gone through it myself.”
“Don’t be silly, Robert. Women don’t get shell shock.”
“I’m serious, Mona. You’ve had almost years of constant strain fighting to get Mooncrest Enterprises and Brynelleth back on their feet, with everyone getting in your way. Then there was my drinking, and you worrying if I would stay sober. I’m so sorry, darling. I should have been more of a help. Instead, I caused more nervous tension. We get married and then have to rush to Montana to deal with the copper miners. Now this debacle. What bride wants to face this? You want fun—gaiety. Some carefree days. I promise you will have that, dearest. Yes, you will have your honeymoon, and a few years from now we will laugh at this insanity.”
“You promise?” Mona looked hopefully at Robert.
Robert kissed Mona’s forehead. “You’re getting face powder all over my nice, white shirt.”
Mona pulled away. “Am I?”
Robert handed Mona his handkerchief. “Dry your tears, Mona. We’ll have none of that.”
“Perhaps I feel this way because we are adrift in the Atlantic alone. There’s no backup.”
“You’re forgetting those two Pinkertons.”
Mona rolled her eyes and shuddered. “Those two couldn’t find their way out of a bathtub.”
“We’ll muddle through somehow. We always do,” Robert said, assuring Mona.
She dabbed her eyes and returned his handkerchief. “Is my makeup ruined?”
“You look fine. Better than fine.”
“Even better than Jean Harlow?”
“Who?” Robert teased. “She looks like the village milkmaid next to you, because you look like a queen.”
“You always say the right thing. I feel better now.”
Robert extended his arm. “Mrs. Farley. Shall we?”
Feeling like her old confident self, Mona remarked, “Yes, there’s nothing like a good cry to get a woman back on track. I’m ready for action now.”
Replacing his handkerchief in the left pocket of his tuxedo, Robert asked, “Is your gun loaded?”
“All six chambers,” Mona replied.
Robert announced, “Then let’s have dinner and hope that Mr. Pugh is off his rocker.”
“Have I told you that I love you lately?” Mona murmured, taking Robert’s arm.
“No, you haven’t.”
“Well, I do.”
“Then as far as I’m concerned, Mona, that is all that matters.” Robert affectionately squeezed Mona’s arm entwined with his, as he guided her toward the dining hall.
22
Mona and Robert spotted a table with Martha Gellhorn and Virginia Hall.
“That must be our seating, Robert,” Mona said.
“Stellar,” Robert said cheerfully. He was hungry and a good meal would set him right.
As they hurried to their table, Mona noticed Mr. Wittgenstein sitting by himself in a corner.
“Excuse me, darling,” Mona said. “Just introduce yourself to the two ladies. I shan’t be long.”
“Don’t tarry, but as you Americans say—I’ll hold down the fort.”
Mona gave a quick smile before she went over to Wittgenstein’s table. “Mr. Wittgenstein?”
Wittgenstein looked up from his soup. Upon seeing it was the duchess, he pulled the napkin from his collar and stood rapidly. “Your Grace,” Wittgenstein spoke, giving a short bow.
“Are you dining alone?” Mona asked.
“I must be,” Wittgenstein replied, looking at the other chair at his table, which was empty.
“Dine with us. I insist.”
“No, thank you. I would be intruding,” Wittgenstein said, embarrassed.
“Nonsense.” Mona motioned to a steward. “Mr. Wittgenstein will be dining with me. Please set another place for him at my table and bring him a new bowl of soup.”
“Right away, Your Grace,” the steward replied.
Mona grabbed Wittgenstein’s arm and subtly pulled him toward her table where Robert was chatting amiably with the two ladies. Upon seeing Wittgenstein, Robert stood.
“Mr. Wittgenstein has agreed to join us,” Mona announced. “I’ve been wanting to speak with him more about philosophy.”
Robert introduced the professor. “Miss Gellhorn and Miss Hall. Ladies, this is Professor Wittgenstein.”
“Hello. Nice to meet you,” Miss Hall said.
Gellhorn gave Wittgenstein a hard look and found him wanting. “Likewise.”
“Ah, American ladies,” Wittgenstein said before sitting down. “More and more Americans are visiting Europe. Nice to see.”
“And you are?” Hall asked.
Wittgenstein answered, “Austrian, Miss Hall.”
“May I inquire as to what you are a professor of, Mr. Wittgenstein?” Hall asked.
“I told you,” Mona interrupted. “Professor Wittgenstein teaches philosophy at Cambridge.”
“I think; therefore, I am,” Miss Hall mused, quoting philosopher René Descartes.
Wittgenstein looked pleased at Miss Hall’s reference, sitting down after the steward reset the table and brought over a chair. “I have developed a theory of language which I call Picture Theory. I believe there are atomic propositions in language which mirror reality.”
No one said anything for a moment until Gellhorn said, “I’m trying to wrap my mind around that, Professor, but I’m coming up blank. I’m afraid what you said flew right over my head.”
Interested, Mona asked, “Are you saying words have physical consequences in the world—just by being spoken?”
“Yes. Of course, I am not speaking of actions in reaction to spoken words, but the words themselves,” Wittgenstein said.
At that moment Noel Coward entered the dining hall, stopping here and there, greeting other passengers, and blowing kisses at admirers. Many stood for Coward as he passed.
“Coward certainly knows how to make an entrance,” a blasé Gellhorn murmured, hiding her excitement at meeting the popular entertainer.
As Mona was watching Coward approach her table, she caught sight of Mrs. Tremayne signaling her.
Seeing that she caught Mona’s attention, Mrs. Tremayne pointed to the captain’s table.
Mona peeked at the captain’s table and shrugged, not knowing what Mrs. Tremayne wanted to convey. Mrs. Tremayne stood but Mona shook her head slightly. Whatever Mrs. Tremayne wanted to convey, Mona didn’t want Hall or Gellhorn to overhear. She motioned to a waiter and whispered into his ear, while Robert distracted the guests with conversation.
