Sky Stitcher, page 20
“And what do you expect?” Rue asked me softly, an underlying tenderness to his tone.
I looked back at Rue, my face contorted with heartbreak, my lips pressed tight, the taste of salty tears seeping between them. “Me?” My voice cracked. “I expect to fall apart if I continue disappointing everyone by not being what they expect me to be.” I paused, drawing in a deep breath. “I don’t fix, I destroy. I am a fighter, not a Stitcher. Why did Halah choose me?” Scrunching my eyes closed, I turned my face back to the ceiling, but the tears streamed freely down my cheeks, regardless of my effort to stop them. “She should have chosen someone better…a better example of a Daughter. Someone who could weave and harness Halah’s power without distorting it. Someone…not broken.”
Rue tugged on my hand, and I fell onto the bed at his side, locked in an embrace that warmed me to my core. “Perhaps it is time for you to embrace who you are, and not what they want you to be. Halah chose you for a reason,” he murmured into my neck, pulling me against him. “Prisha’s noticed you for a reason. How many Daughters are left still fighting? How many could pull Prisha’s monsters from the sky and endear them to your cause?”
“Only one.” I corrected, Only you.
But I realized I’d inadvertently answered his question with my haste to object. Only one…only me.
“One is all you need. If there’s ever been a Daughter to stand a chance against Prisha, it is you. You are not broken because you don’t conform to their expectations of you, Zara. You are…exceptional.”
Exceptionally screwed, perhaps. He draped a shadowed wing over my shoulder, and the comfort of its warmth surprised me. I should get up. I should not let him hold me like this.
“Tell you what. I’ll make you a deal,” Rue mumbled, his breath drawing in slow waves as a calm washed over us.
“No more deals, please. I’ve had enough of those.”
“Just give me…one minute. One minute to recover my strength before I burn this world down to help you.” My eyes widened, but his embrace tightened reassuringly around me before he continued to mumble dreamily beneath my ear. “One minute, then I will break down that door and help you find your Eldress to see what she has to say about all of this.”
I nodded, frowning at the pallor of his skin and silently promising to give him my patience. I owed him that much. I played with his hair, wondering what the Eldress would have to say and if it would even matter. Wondering if I could bring myself to listen if it wasn’t what I wished to hear. I wondered what I wanted her to say about Rue, about Rali, about my responsibilities and failures. I wondered so long and so hard I did not notice how Rue’s muscles relaxed and how his breaths lengthened as he drifted into a peaceful sleep, holding me in his arms.
Chapter 21
Rali’s Gift
Kill them all.
I gasped, eyes snapping open as the asphyxiating clutches of Prisha’s rage melted from the last vestiges of my nightmare. My chest heaved with incomplete breaths, desperate to resurface from the dream, yet consumed by the haunting images still plaguing me. The injured Guardian, wings pinned to the wall by daggers of shadow. The fear and defeat that spilled from his aura faster than the shadowy blood leaking from his chest. The way his eyes gaped, staring at his own heart, still beating in Prisha’s hand. How his body crumbled to ash in the moment she unmade him.
Each time I closed my eyes, she was there, waiting. It’s only a dream, Zara.
But every instinct within me screamed that it was more.
Sunlight trickled through the open archways, filtering through the gauzy curtains to splash its halfhearted glow against my nose. A different warmth wrapped around my arms, curling up against my back. Rue’s chest rose and fell slowly behind mine—relaxed and still drifting in the clutches of sleep. He was here. He was safe.
And he was very close to me.
Oh. The realization of his proximity startled me from my panic, my muscles solidifying like blocks of ice against his frame. I knew I should not have permitted him to work his way so close to me, but…I couldn’t deny I enjoyed it far more than I should have. He felt familiar. Right.
The terror from my nightmare drifted away as I eased back into Rue’s hold.
No matter how firmly I commanded myself to move, I couldn’t bring myself to leave the safety of his arms. Not yet.
Carefully rolling over so as not to disturb him, I repositioned myself at an angle more conducive to studying his face. Color had returned to his cheeks, and the pained crease between his brows had smoothed to an expression of utmost calm. His hair broke free from its usual carefree perfection, now wildly mussed and chaotic. I like your chaos…it matches mine. His words echoed in my memory.
I ran my fingers through the out-of-place hairs, smoothing them away from his forehead, and permitted the faintest smile of appreciation to appear on my lips. If his injury still pained him, no evidence remained behind to suggest it. My eyes trailed along his frame to check the state of his stitches, but the comforter wrapped firmly around his leg in a protective cocoon. I sighed. Moving it would only wake him. I’d promised myself to give him the time to rest so he could recover enough to help me, and…I realized with a start as my breath hitched, my fingers still twisted through his strands of hair. I wanted to give him the time to rest because…his well-being had become a concern of mine. I wanted to protect him in the same way he had protected me. And perhaps for other reasons I dared not name.
If I left them unnamed, they could continue to exist as a nebulous cloud at the edges of my mind, never taking shape into something tangible. Something real. It was better that way.
Instead, I peeled myself from his arms and padded toward the door. I lifted my fist with the intention to knock, but hesitated. Why would the guards let me leave now if they’d been so adamantly against it last night? Still, I wondered if I could persuade them. Perhaps with a request for food? Rue would need something when he woke…he’d need it after all the energy he’d expended in his fight.
My knuckles rapped softly against the wood. Blankets rustled behind me, and I froze, turning nervously back to Rue. He merely shifted and stretched a black wing across the bed. A beam of sunlight cast a stark contrast of highlights and shadows across his features, and the air in my lungs snagged, my eyes unintentionally lingering to admire this perfectly peaceful version of him.
“Lady Zara?” the guard asked politely from the other side of the door, his voice muffled by the inches of solid wood between us. The guard was different from the one I’d antagonized last night, less gruff with exasperation and perhaps slightly more amenable to my demands. “I am sorry, Lady Zara, but you are meant to stay in your room until Rali comes to collect you.” Or not.
My insides crawled at the mention of Rali, pulverizing his name into gravel inside my gut. “Surely he would not deny me breakfast? I’m starving.”
“It is already past noon, Lady Zara. But I will have a service sent for you to tide you over.”
Past noon? And nobody brought me anything to eat? Am I a prisoner or a guest? I supposed they had left me with tea and small pastries, but my stomach growled for something more substantial. The rumbling protest played its part quite convincingly. Pity the guard could not hear it through the door. “I can’t wait that long. Please. You may…escort me if you’d like,” I offered, employing my airiest tone of innocence.
A moment of silence suggested the guard’s internal debate, then the lock clicked softly before the door swung open. I slipped through the gap and linked my arm through his with more confidence than I truly commanded, steering him away from my quarters. He didn’t need the opportunity to inspect them or return me to them…Rue needed sleep, not questioning. And I needed food, answers, and the Eldress. Not seeds of doubt or more hours helplessly trapped in my chambers.
As if summoned by the faintest whiff of my freedom, Rali rounded the corner, dressed in the deep blue uniform of the palace guards. The black buttons of his jacket lined the front of his chest all the way up to the high collar at his neck, creating a perfectly tailored silhouette to showcase his muscular frame. If I had not grown to mistrust him, I might have appreciated his handsome features more thoroughly. But as it was, I could not hold back the way my expression soured at the sight of his arrival.
His steps faltered almost imperceptibly as he neared us, gaze narrowing on the guard who hastily made a show of unlinking his arm from mine. A smile that hinted at warmly crafted lies and deception lit his features when he turned to me, making my skin crawl. “Zara. You’re awake. Good morning.” He swept forward and took my hand in his, planting a moist kiss upon my skin. I resisted the urge to wipe it on my skirt when my arm fell back to my side. “Happy A’i Halajan. May Halah bless us. The day we’ve dreamed of has finally arrived.”
The urge to wipe my hand of Rali’s touch spread like wildfire through the rest of my body until I couldn’t hold back my reservations any longer. “Rali, I don’t think—”
He pulled me close, pressing my cheek uncomfortably against the row of buttons down his front as he stroked my hair. “Shhhh,” he hushed me like a small child afraid of the night, slicing through my unfinished thought to silence it. “It’s normal to have hesitations before the ceremony, and I know I haven’t acted like myself lately, but I have a surprise for you to make up for it. One that will surely lift your spirits.”
I freed my arms from his restricting hold, wedging my elbows against his chest. “Rali, I mean it. We need to discuss this. And I want to see—”
He stepped away, collecting both of my hands in his. “The scouts have returned, Zara. They’ve found your Sisters.”
My heart collapsed, careening through the pit of my stomach to be swallowed by the gaping pit spreading beneath my feet. Or at least…it felt that way. In reality, I stared at him numbly, mouth gaping and lungs frozen in mid-breath, my entire body caught in some stutter of time. Everything else—all other thoughts and worries—faded to nothing more than extraneous noise that hummed in the background…both undecipherable and unimportant.
“Where are they?” I managed, finally collecting myself.
My mind buzzed with impatience as Rali led us through the winding corridors of the palace, round corners, up stairs, down stairs, and around again until I became quite disoriented by the scheme of the layout. The further we moved from my chambers, the more the connection binding me to Rue pulled at my heart. It stretched, but not unbearably so. I only hoped the tension would not wake Rue or make him worry. My fingers absentmindedly moved to rest over my heart, clutching the dull ache beginning at the end of the tether, pulled taut around each jolting thud of the muscle. Or perhaps that was simply my worry.
Finally, Rali stalled in front of a set of double doors, long golden handles gleaming in the middle, a pair of potted succulents on either side of the entrance.
He pecked my cheek with a quick kiss, then nodded to the doors. “Go on. They are very excited to see you. I’ll give you some privacy while you visit with them. I’ll see you this evening.”
My sense clattered back to me as Rali knocked on the door, then swiftly departed, taking long strides that stamped confidently against the ornamental runner lining the hall. “Where are you going?” I called to his back.
“I have a lot to do,” he tossed over his shoulder. “Don’t worry…you’ll be safe. There are guards posted in the room for your protection.”
That wasn’t what worried me at all, but he’d already disappeared, slipping away into one of the hallways of the labyrinth he called a palace. Even the sound of his footsteps faded, leaving me with no hope to follow.
My shoulders tensed, my lungs pulling in far more air than required, only to expel it in a forceful vent of frustration. The door swung open, nudging my shoulder blade with a sharp bite as it clipped against the bone. A guard frowned apologetically at me, clinging to the door handle when I yelped and spun to face him, but then he smiled warmly, stood taller, and gestured me into the room.
The room was set lavishly with rows of tables with shimmering damask linens the same color as the liquid bubbling inside the long flutes at each place setting. Empty crystal serving bowls reflected the sunlight streaming through the open arches, marking the transition between the banquet hall and the beautiful terrace beyond. Instead of cushions, delicate chairs built from slender rods lined either side of the table, tinted gold beneath the warm glow of the afternoon sun. Outside, the gurgle of running water sang an unfamiliar tune.
The air danced with a melody of aromas—roasted fowl and a mixture of spices both familiar and unknown, breads, and the sweet, tart scents of fruit. In the corner of the room, a smaller table boasted an array of small plates. A circular platter of halfmoon bread sat on one end of the table, and a jewel-toned mixture of couscous and vegetables filled a crystal bowl on the other. Between them, vibrant salads, cheeses, bowls of decadent spreads, and flatbreads for dipping erupted in heaping mounds.
I turned back to the guard at the door, raising an inquisitive brow in his direction. Aside from the guards stationed along each wall, the room appeared empty. He nodded toward the open terrace.
A pair of guards marched through the tallest archway, then moved to either side of the opening, revealing the long line of Daughters as they filed through the opening. Mother first, then Juna, and Sessu, and—I gasped. “Lurah!” She’s alive.
My skirt billowed around my ankles as I raced toward them all, throwing my arms around them with tears beginning to brim in my eyes. They were here…they were well. Even Lurah. Rali had found them for me, just as he’d promised. My anger with him melted, if only slightly. There was still the matter of the Eldress. And Rue, my mind chimed in, quite unhelpfully. The tether around my heart smarted with a dull twinge of pain.
“You’re here! You’re all here! What happened?” I breathed, a laugh of relief freeing itself at the same time I brushed the tears from my eyes. “Was it the Riders? Khazdruki? Prisha?”
Mother smiled, the wrinkles of her familiar face folding, never reaching the milky clouds in her eyes. She held my shoulders, staring at me with a fondness that seemed to have forgotten the long years she’d spent critiquing every misstep I made. My Sisters watched us quietly, wearing identical smiles that did nothing to inspire one of my own. Something was…wrong. I felt it creeping into my bones, snaking through my veins like dark shadows of dread, wrapping around my throat until my pulse pounded loudly in my ears.
“Yes. Riders, but…never mind that,” Mother croaked, a tear forming at the corner of her eyes as they bounced from the guards back to me. “A story for another day. Today, we must focus our hearts on A’i Halajan and save the rest for tomorrow. Halah’s way may not always be clear to us, but we must follow the path she chooses. Hmm?” she asked in her most knowing tone, waiting for me to agree with her.
But I did not agree with her. A flurry of nerves and worry threatened to burst free if I tried to contain myself any longer. “Mother…tell me what happened. I was so worried. And the Eldress is here. Have you seen her? Will you bring me to her?”
The sagging skin at her throat moved visibly when she swallowed, eyes flickering back to the guards. “She is fine, Zara. Do not worry. Today is about you and A’i Halajan. Let us focus on Halah’s blessing. Come, we really must get you ready.”
I dug my heels into the sandstone tile, my knees locked and as unyielding as the towering walls around us. “Wait. I need to talk to you.” I shook my head, trying to sort through all the raging worries clamoring for attention in my mind to make some sort of ordered sense of them. It was a futile effort, but I spewed the main thoughts from my mouth all at once. “We need to talk about Prisha and the Eldress. And Halah and...Rali. I don’t want to marry Rali.”
Mother’s eyes snapped to the guard in the corner, whose lips had tightened into a firm line, his eyes darkening slits of warning. My Sisters averted their eyes, none of them daring to look at me.
“What is wrong with you all?” They shuffled their feet, finding the architectural design of the patterned sandstone to be the newest wonder of the world. My Sisters normally chatted and joked, teasing me to no end, but they’d fallen silent, repressed by some fear that fell over us like a stifling blanket.
I’d been grateful that my Sisters hadn’t greeted me with the unsettling reverence they showed when I’d been chosen as Stitcher, but they hadn’t greeted me like family either. They weren’t acting themselves. A great rift seemed to split open between us, an impasse that couldn’t be traversed. And I didn’t understand why.
Mother’s stiffness melted, though her smile remained forced. “Sometimes, it is hard to know what is right and what choices we must make. The Daughters coordinated this blessed day, but this union is not for you or me to decide—so do not bear that burden for yourself. May Halah guide you…she will show the way.” She pulled me into a hug and tucked her chin so her mouth fell beside my ear, and I thought for a moment she may whisper some truth beneath her riddles. A stern look from the guard quickly extinguished that flame of hope. “May Halah guide us all,” she murmured instead. “Come.”
She grabbed my hand and led me to the terrace, her bangles and jewels jingling with each step. Her graying hair wrapped around her head in a braided crown banded with gold and silver beads that sparkled in the sun. Her woven scarf draped over her shoulders like a cape, fluttering gently behind her as she moved. My Sisters’ hair had been pulled back into intricate braids, adorned with jewelry and beads in preparation for the festivities of the evening. How long ago had they arrived if they’d had time to dress themselves so extravagantly? Why didn’t they come to see me right away? My stomach twisted with the ache of their oversight. Didn’t they know how worried I’d been? How the weight of their disappearance had gnawed at my insides until every part of me felt raw and powerless in their absence?
