Two Hearts Healing, page 13
‘Thanks. It’s been a long day.’
‘You’ve slept for nearly three hours. Check your phone,’ he said.
‘For the time? It’s on the dashboard.’
‘No. The bloody thing has been buzzing non-stop.’
She giggled. ‘It shouldn’t be. My notifications are set to silent.’
‘Just check it.’ His terse voice added to her sense of amusement. What harm did it do if people were sending her texts while she slept? She picked up the phone to see a pile of notifications on her social media, several new emails, and texts from everyone in her family.
Toshiko: Loved your pic of Bio. I’m handing you the farm account.
Mama: Are you alright? Haven’t heard from you all day. You looked tired at the Newmarket presentation. And you missed the Aust Cup presentation.
John: Toshiko thinks you should run the farm socials. Keen?
Rachel: Enjoy the ride home. Don’t do anything I wouldn’t do. :D
Shannon: Why am I getting calls from journos about you?
‘I see what you mean.’ Serena rubbed her eyes. She’d better call Mama first. ‘I have to make a few calls, is that alright?’
‘Yeah.’ Lee turned off the radio, and Serena realised how nice it had been that he’d listened to quiet music as he drove. Nothing too loud or sharp sounding to bother her overly sensitive ears. She pressed the call button on her screen to connect to Mama’s phone. To dial her sounded old fashioned but pressed her sounded weird. A fun question for her socials, maybe? What do people use?
‘Hey Mama, it’s me.’
‘How are you? You missed the Australian Cup presentation.’
‘Didn’t Toshiko tell you? I had a sleep in someone’s office. Bio’s win made me quite tired and I didn’t want to risk it.’
‘And you are good now?’ Mama sounded worried, and Serena had to remind herself how tough it must be to have an adult daughter with a major injury. Mama hadn’t grown up with horse racing, not like the rest of her family, and had learned to live with everyone’s passions for the game while being married to Dad. It had to be difficult, even without the financial dramas caused by his gambling addiction.
‘Yes. We are almost home.’
‘I talked to the others and they said you were coming with Lee. Is there something I need to know?’ Mama’s blunt comment made Serena feel ten years old again, and the memory of Mama’s expression when she caught her and Rachel covered in mud after playing in the dam brought a grin to her face.
‘Um, it’s nothing to worry about.’ At least Mama was worrying about something other than her health.
‘Don’t lie to me.’ Something about that mother voice made her flinch slightly.
‘Really, Mama. Lee had an appointment in the city before the races, so he dropped me off at rehab this morning. You knew this.’
‘I didn’t know you’d be coming home from the races with him. When did you get this close?’ A flush raced over her face. At least she didn’t have this conversation on speaker phone.
‘Mama, it’s nothing. I used to work with him. It’s …’ Serena glanced over at Lee for a clue as to how to articulate her feelings after kissing him this morning. A fresh rush of blood to her face made her stare out the window at wide paddocks.
‘It’s just what?’ he whispered. She shook her head, covering her blazing cheeks with her free hand.
‘As long as it doesn’t set you back.’ Mama’s voice rang through the phone in a hard tone, and Serena grimaced. She missed the old relationship they’d had, before her accident, when Serena had been able to confide in Mama without judgement. Mama’s need to bundle her in cotton wool made complete sense—she had nearly died after all—but damn it was hard to deal with.
‘This morning, my doctors said I am making excellent progress.’ The morning seemed so long ago. A small swell of pride made her rib cage expand—she’d survived a massive day with only two naps. It was definitely progress.
‘Good. Will you be home for dinner?’
‘Yes, Mama.’ Serena let out a long sigh of relief when Mama hung up, swallowing down the surge of guilt in the back of her throat.
‘Are you okay?’ Lee asked.
‘Yes. Why wouldn’t I be?’
‘Sounded like the Inquisition.’
She grinned. ‘Nah, Mama has had a rough time in the last, well, decade, I guess. To have her favourite daughter nearly die has made her over-protective, that’s all.’
‘Favourite daughter.’ Lee growled low, and the sound rumbled into her.
‘I’m joking.’ She rolled her eyes, then stared at him. His grim expression made her blush disappear. ‘Oh, you really hate that idea. Let me guess, your parents had a favourite and it wasn’t you.’
He mumbled a reply that she didn’t understand.
‘I take that as a yes.’ She pulled in a deep breath, smelling his masculine cedar scent over the car’s general aroma of horse and dog. ‘It’s not cool. Parents who have favourites are arseholes. I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have joked about it.’
‘Agree.’ Another glance at his thunderous expression made her want to lighten the mood in the car. She could ask him about it another time, or hopefully, he’d keep going to therapy.
‘Hey, do you play the Stable Stars app?’ she asked, changing the subject.
‘Yeah.’ His voice still held a grumbly note.
‘I hope you aren’t Chester,’ she joked about her nemesis on the app. They shared the top spots, interchanging frequently, and she’d love to know who was behind the avatar. A laugh filled the car, completely changing the solemn mood.
‘You are Serena’s Song.’ He spoke her avatar with utter confidence, and she giggled.
‘Oh my God. You’re my nemesis.’
‘Seems that way.’ His smile lit up his whole face, highlighting his handsome features, his thin nose and sharp jawline, and the lines around his eyes thanks to many mornings peering into the dim light to watch his horses. Thinking about his face in separate parts made him sound like a kid’s painting, not the cohesive uniquely handsome person sitting next to her. She clutched her stomach as the giggles wouldn’t stop coming. Laughter helped ease the tension from her conversation with Mama and the nearness of Lee sitting beside her in the car, like the sudden rush when a horse missed the start and everything paused for a tight worried second before the horse responded, leaping forward to chase the field. Eventually, she managed to suck in a few deep breaths and steady herself. This emotional roller-coaster should make her exhausted not buzzing with anticipation.
‘Who is Chester?’ she asked. Better to ask a dull question than to distract him from the road by kissing him. She’d relived their kiss too many times already, her fingers ready to explore more … his broad shoulders and down across his chest. Would he have the same dusting of dark blond hair on his chest as he had on his impressive forearms?
‘A little dun pony I had as a kid.’
Serena forced herself back into the conversation. Talking about ponies was safe. It didn’t have this longing for him that soaked her lingerie and made her skin feel ready for his touch.
‘My favourite pony was named Dusty. I can’t believe you are the person stopping me from total domination on Stable Stars.’
He paused, and she flicked a glance at him. His knuckles were white on the steering wheel, and a deep frown between his eyebrows made him look severe—a complete contrast to a second ago when they’d been laughing. A shiver flew down her spine at the switch. Desire fled, replaced by confusion.
‘What?’ she asked. What had she said to make him stare at the road with such viciousness?
‘You don’t want world domination. That idea isn’t good for anyone.’ His lengthy statement surprised her. Lee usually spoke in clipped sentences without this … well, almost hatred in his voice.
‘You sound like you know what you are talking about.’ An undercurrent of importance coloured his statement and she wanted to know more.
‘Damn your bloody curiosity.’ His taut voice made her tense in her seat. Uncertainty made her stomach turn flips. She could deal with Lee when he was commanding, she liked it when he laughed, and she adored his kisses. But this version of Lee who cursed the world around him, and radiated anger? She didn’t know what to do with that.
‘You know I’m not serious, right? World domination is just a silly joke. I only made it because I’d been wondering who the hell Chester was ever since I got on the app. I want to trounce the only person on there that I can’t beat regularly.’ She glanced over at him, his hands still tight on the steering wheel, and she twisted her hands in her lap. ‘I started playing when I was in rehab.’
‘Why?’ His terse response made her want to smile because he sounded so put out that she’d managed to infiltrate his rage, and she bit the inside of her cheek to prevent a nervous grin.
‘Before …’ Serena dragged in a deep breath, ‘before my accident, I watched the races for form. I didn’t have an agent, most of my rides came from you and Shannon, although I’d always read the nominations and ring around to get a few extras for each race day. It was work, but in rehab, I missed it. I missed knowing the names of the city stars, and of the regular country class horses. My social feeds were always filled with discussions about horses, and I felt so disconnected.’
‘Makes sense. I’d miss it too.’ The strain in his voice ebbed away.
‘Just watching the races all day while in rehab had no purpose, and I needed to connect to it.’
Lee’s hand landed on her thigh and she jerked in her seat with a squeak at the sudden contact. She stared at his hand, long fingers, and tanned skin with a few freckles in among the masculine hairs. Serena couldn’t look at him as she cautiously tucked her little finger around his, the skin on skin contact searing her.
‘Why Stable Stars? You’d be making money if it was real bets.’ His question made her heart skip a beat and a bitter taste wash over her tongue. She pushed his hand off her thigh and crossed her arms.
‘I refuse to bet.’
‘Because you are a jockey?’ He gave her a handy excuse to avoid talking about the real reason the idea of betting upset her. But if this chemistry between them was to go anywhere, he deserved her honesty.
‘I’m not a jockey anymore. I can’t pass the concussion test to get my licence back.’
‘Being a jockey is a lifestyle, more than just the paperwork,’ he said.
She tried her best not to roll her eyes, ‘I wish it was that easy. A jockey without a licence is like guacamole without avocado. Pointless.’
He chuckled, a rich sound, and she didn’t want to acknowledge the way it made her warm. She was in love with the idea that she could tease him out of a dark place. If only it were real.
‘So why not bet? Your Stable Stars ratings would have earnt you decent money.’
The bitterness on her tongue grew in strength. ‘I already told you. Dad nearly lost the farm thanks to his gambling addiction. I couldn’t bet even if it was someone else’s money. Stable Stars kept me in touch with racing without the issues of gambling.’ Her shallow breathing matched the racing of her heart.
‘The perfect Bassett family is not so perfect.’ Lee’s tone reflected the bitterness in her mouth.
‘What?’ She pushed his hand off her thigh, twisting towards him, indignant.
‘I know all about families who present a perfect front to the world but are arseholes behind closed doors.’ He dragged his hand through his hair, blowing out a hard breath.
‘Take care, Lee. My Dad was sick, he had an addiction, he wasn’t abusive.’ As soon as the word left her mouth she wanted to grab it back. Blast. He’d been in therapy only this morning because his father was a steaming pile of dogshit. Her tirade hovered between them, making it hard to breathe the thickened air.
‘I’m sorry.’ She tried to sound as contrite as she felt. Her heart hammered in her chest, and not in a good way.
‘You shouldn’t be sorry. I’m the fucker who got angry when you mentioned the truth.’
‘Lee. You aren’t a fucker. What the hell?’
His intake of breath was so loud in the enclosed space of the car. ‘Right. Dr Sibbritt told me to notice whenever I used Father’s opinion of me.’
‘I understand.’
‘You do?’ His cynical tone rattled in her ears.
‘Um, well, not precisely. I don’t understand how a parent could say such awful things about their own kid. I do understand how tough it can be when it feels like everything is falling apart.’ Her family had fought damned hard to claw their way back to success after Dad’s death. She’d assumed she and Mama had done enough to stop the rot from affecting the farm, and yet, the revelation of all the different debts had rocked them. The depth of Dad’s addiction complicated their grief. John had thrown himself into farm work, pushing himself to get the farm back in the black. Shannon spent all his time in his stables, taking on more horses and more owners to fund his training business, even though he found speaking to people difficult. Rachel had gone wild in the city—stories of her partying all night and turning up to trackwork with black bags under her eyes had filtered back to Tranquil Waters. And she and Mama had tried to hold everyone together. She’d ridden Shannon’s horses for nothing and had put all her racetrack earnings back into the farm, except for the portion Mama insisted she keep in a separate fund for a rainy day. No amount of arguing could get her to change her mind. They were already in a storm, why wait for another disaster? Little did she know, five years later, all the hard work to save the farm had paid off and she was about to get hit by her own storm. Dad’s trails of deceit had been hard at the time, but at least her family had each other. She wanted to rage at Lee’s no-good parents for telling him such lies about himself.
‘Father had no such qualms. Nothing I ever did was good enough, and it was only until I had enough money to grab my freedom that I realised just how awful he was. He trained me to be perfect in public, the blond blue-eyed son who won ribbons at pony club and made the school’s top sports teams. But it was never good enough.’ Whenever Lee spoke effusively, she wanted to wrap his words up in a satin cloth and keep them forever, except the words were nasty and shouldn’t be kept. Maybe burned to ash during their annual winter bonfire? Her eyes filled with unshed tears for the emotionally abused kid he had been. Growing up she’d always been loved, even when Dad was at his lowest point, chasing his losses, he’d been there for all of them. His love for his family had been the only thing keeping him from falling off the ledge completely. She sighed. The evidence was that he had fallen, he’d just kept it from them, so they didn’t worry.
‘He’s the fucker. Not you.’ Serena had a sudden urge to thump Lee’s father for destroying a young kid and making him doubt the wonderful man he’d grown into.
‘I know.’ He didn’t sound convinced. She left it alone, knowing he’d slowly work through it all with Dr Sibbritt. Getting professional help would make all the difference in his journey.
‘Lee.’ She twisted to face him, the seatbelt digging into her hip, and laid her hand gently over his. She ignored the surge of chemistry as she touched him, the ever-present physical attraction between them unimportant right now. ‘One day the confidence you have as a horse trainer will flow into the rest of your life, and you will be the man he didn’t want you to be.’
‘I’m already stronger than he wants. When I win the Australian Champion Trainer title, he won’t be able to deny it anymore.’
She inhaled sharply. ‘I don’t think it’s wise to give him power over your goals. Be the champion trainer for yourself, not for someone else. You just told me that no achievement was ever good enough for him. You know, deep down, this one won’t be either.’
He roared, thumping the steering wheel with his other hand, startling a crow sitting on a fence beside the road as the horn blasted. ‘Fuck. You’re right. When did you get so wise?’
‘Wise is my middle name.’ She made the quiet jest to break the thick tension in the car. She’d flinched at the sudden loudness of the horn, wanting to cover her ears at the noisy assault. If you could see tension, the car would be completely fogged up. He shook his head and pulled the vehicle over into a driveway. The tyres crunched on the gravel, spraying up dust as he parked. He leaned forward, his elbows on the outside of the steering wheel, pinching his nose with thumb and forefinger. Serena waited, knowing he needed time, not more words. Normally during long silences like this, she’d reach for her phone to flick through her social media feeds to pass the time. Nothing about right now was normal. Lee’s chest heaved as he sat there clutching his face with his eyes closed. She wanted to reach out and comfort him, to rub his back as he fought for breath.
‘Serena.’ His whisper came out harsh, to match the earlier sound of his tyres on the gravel, and she swallowed to try and get some moisture back in her mouth.
‘Yes?’ She held her breath. He turned to face her, his blue eyes staring at her with a piercing intensity. He reached up and held her cheeks, his lips slightly parted. There was a hardness in the way he stared at her, and she wanted all of it.
‘Kiss me.’ His command made her purr in the back of her throat.
‘Yes, boss.’ She leaned closer, and he closed the gap, his lips brushing over hers with an electricity that shocked her right down into her core.
‘Fuck, I love it when you call me that.’
She raised one eyebrow, an attempt at snark while her body responded to his touch with a crackle of heat. ‘You like it when I’m sarcastic?’
He lifted his head away from her lips and she wanted to drag him back towards her.
‘The way you call me boss. Like you want me to be your boss in bed.’
She clamped her thighs together at the rush of heat between her legs. ‘Really?’
