“I’ll take an orange power drink.”

  As I bend down to open the fridge door, something catches my eye outside. Marcelo and Mira are walking up the path from the forest. A short way behind them are Sofia and Giovanni, hand in hand. The watch he got her for her birthday catches the light on the pathway and glistens on her wrist.

  My fist clenches at my side. It’s not like I didn’t suspect they were together tonight, but fuck is it infuriating seeing it. It’s probably a good thing I wasn’t at the forest party. Who knows whether I would have been able to keep myself in check? Lately, it seems like any control I used to have is melting away like the polar ice caps.

  I bend and pull Tommaso’s drink from the fridge then walk back to the couch. “Here you go.” I toss him the bottle. “I think I’m going to get going. I can’t take losing any more tonight.”

  Tommaso laughs. “Thanks for hanging with me. I know there are a lot better things or girls you could be doing.”

  I laugh off his comment. “What do you mean? I’m an engaged man.”

  “Yeah… okay.”

  Does he know something about Sofia and me? How could he?

  Then his face draws tight. “We’ll talk tomorrow after our calls.”

  I nod. The weight of the unknown hangs between us.

  Once I see myself out, I make my way to my room, passing Angelica on the way.

  “Hey, Antonio, is Aurora back in her room now?”

  I stop walking, forehead creased. “How would I know?”

  Her head rears back. “She said you guys were doing something tonight.”

  I make a mental note to figure out what Aurora’s playing at. “We were supposed to, but something came up. I’m not sure what she ended up doing.”

  She frowns for a beat before recovering. “Okay, well, I’ll catch up with her tomorrow, I guess. Thanks!” With a wave, she flits on down the hall toward the elevator.

  When I get to my room, I fuck around for a while, listening to music and reading. I shower then finally force myself to sleep. It refuses to come.

  Every time I close my eyes, all I see is Sofia shirtless and lying beneath me, her ample tits in my hands, my mouth around her nipples. My raging hard-on is a constant reminder of how much I want her, how much I’m apparently willing to risk to have her.

  Finally, I can’t take it anymore. I fly out of bed, pull on a pair of pants from the floor, then head out of my room to the stairwell, shirtless with no socks or shoes. I’m like a man possessed as I walk up two floors, taking the stairs two at a time. I’m panting when I arrive at her door and don’t stop to question what the hell I’m doing when I knock.

  But once I hear the sound of my knuckles rapping on the door in the quiet night, I realize how fucking stupid this is. What if Giovanni’s inside with her? What the hell will I say then? I have no excuse.

  My pulse throbs in my neck at the thought of what they’d be doing in there in the middle of the night.

  Another side of me argues I don’t fucking care if he’s in there. I’ll figure something out. Make up something on the spot and I’ll be happy to have interrupted. I knock again, more determined than ever to… to what?

  I have no idea. All I know is that I need to see her.

  The door opens and Sofia’s wearing the same silk cami-and-shorts set she wore the night my obsession began. What little self-control I still had flees as I step inside, swinging the door closed with my foot, and pull her into me and claim her mouth.

  She’s surprised at first, as she always is, but she doesn’t push me away like she did the other night. Instead, her hands dive into my hair and her tongue meets mine, vying for control. But we both know I won’t give it to her. I ease us into a steady pace that’s less demanding. I don’t want to scare her off, but God, I want to mark this woman. Just me. No one else. The idea that someone else will coax out her innocent sexuality makes me insane.

  I walk us to her bed, and when the backs of her legs hit the mattress, she stumbles and falls back onto it in a sitting position. Her big doe eyes stare up at me, full of lust and… trust. That is such a fucking turn-on coming from someone like Sofia, who has no sexual experience. That she would trust me with her body is a privilege and I’m not going to allow her to regret her decision.

  “Take your shirt off.” My voice comes out raspy.

  She hesitates for the briefest moment, then pulls the silky fabric up over her head.

  My hands reach out the moment her perfect tits are in view, and I hold the weight of them, squeezing and running my thumbs over her nipples. She shudders with pleasure and sighs. I want my lips on her skin but force myself to straighten up.

  “Now the shorts.”

  Sofia immediately brings her hands to the elastic of her silk shorts and shimmies them down her legs before kicking them to the side.

  God, she is fucking perfect. Sexy as hell and yet still so innocent.

  “Now lie back.”

  She does as I ask, her hair spilled across the comforter beneath her. Only then do I fall to my knees in front of her. She sharply inhales when I spread her legs, swinging them over my shoulders, and yank her ass closer to the edge of the bed.

  No other man has ever had the view I have now—her perfect pink pussy glistening and begging for my tongue. The thought that in a few seconds, I’ll be the only one who knows how this woman tastes makes my cock harden until it’s painfully pushing against the cotton of the pajama pants I’m wearing.

  I place gentle kisses up her left leg, starting at her ankle and working my way up from there. When I reach her inner thigh, Sofia’s breaths become more pronounced and she grips the blanket beneath her.

  Eventually, I move my face directly between her legs and inhale deeply while I meet her gaze. Her scent is equal parts sweet and musky, and I can’t wait to delve my tongue between her folds. Sofia turns her head.

  Oh, no, she’s not going to be embarrassed.

  “Don’t look away from me, dolcezza. Our desire is nothing to be embarrassed about.”

  “I… I’ve never done this,” she says in a whisper-soft voice.

  “I know. But trust me, you’re going to love it.” I spread her open and swipe my tongue all the way from her puckered asshole up to her clit and her back arches off the bed.

  Her hand dives into the curls on the top of my head and pulls until there’s a bite of pain when I concentrate my efforts on her swollen clit. Sofia’s hips buck and I use one hand on her stomach to hold her in place while I feast on her pussy.

  The sounds she’s making will become my new soundtrack when I beat off.

  I bring my face down and fuck her with my tongue, and she raises her head to watch. My eyes take in her heavy eyelids and the way her teeth nail down her bottom lip. My ego grows to infinite proportions because I’m the one who put that look on her face. Me.

  “Do you think Giovanni could make you feel this good?” I murmur against her wet flesh before swiping my tongue from bottom to top.

  Her gaze moves from watching what I’m doing to meet mine.

  “Answer me, tesoro.”

  She shakes her head, still holding my gaze.

  “I want the words.” I nip her inner thigh.

  She moans. “No,” she strangles out.

  “Only me.”

  “Always you,” she admits.

  I don’t know what she means by that, but her words light a fire in my blood.

  I double my efforts, letting my finger trace the rim of her entrance while I alternately suck on her clit and flick it with my tongue. A minute later, her thighs squeeze the life out of me, clamping around my head as she comes on my face, crying out.

  I lap up every bit of her pleasure as she heaves for breath. I should probably give her time to recover, make sense of what just happened. Instead, I crawl up over her body and kiss the living shit out of her, forcing her to taste herself on my tongue.

  Rather than pull away, she groans and wraps her arms and legs around me before pulling away and staring me straight in the eye. “More, Antonio.”

  My cock twitches and I chuckle into her neck. “Let’s walk before we run, piccolo innocente.”

  “I don’t want to be innocent anymore. I want you to be my first.”

  My head snaps up to meet her gaze. “You can’t be serious.”

  Does she realize what she’s saying? Of course she does. She grew up in the same life I did. Sleeping with me would soil her for marriage. She’d no longer be pure for her husband. That is a line I cannot cross.

  “You deserve more than to be a goomah, Sofia.” I pull away from her and roll to my side.

  The hopeful look on her face falls to disappointment. “I’m not asking to be a goomah. I’m just asking you to be my first.” She covers her tits by throwing an arm over them.

  “Why would you want that? What will your husband think one day?”

  Her eyes narrow. “Mira’s right about the men in the family.” She sits up, and though I want to force her to lie back down beside me, I don’t.

  “I don’t think that, but most of the people in our world do. You know this.”

  She walks over into her closet, returning a moment later wearing a robe that matches the silk pajamas she wore earlier. She has it tied around her waist with a bow and her nipples poke through the thin silk fabric. “Maybe I don’t care what everyone thinks.”

  I arch an eyebrow. We both know that, unlike my sister, she cares a lot about what other people think.

  “Maybe I don’t care as much anymore.” She shrugs.

  “And why is that?” I stand from the bed.

  She opens her mouth as though she wants to say something then snaps it shut. “Never mind. It doesn’t matter.” She walks around me to pick up her pajamas off the floor, and once she has them in her hand, her back still to me, she says casually, “Maybe I’ll see if someone else can help me lose this pesky virginity. Perhaps Giovanni will help me out.”

  Sofia just waved a red cape and I’m the bull.

  19

  SOFIA

  I don’t see him coming. One moment my comment, meant to piss him off, is flying out of my mouth, and the next, I’m pinned facedown on the mattress with Antonio’s chest and hips pressed to my backside.

  “Don’t you even think of letting that stronzo into your body,” he hisses into my ear.

  “You’re acting like a jealous boyfriend,” I spit out, growing wetter, loving the way his arousal is pressed between the cheeks of my ass.

  “You think he deserves you because he throws you a party and buys you an expensive watch? A man who doesn’t even know that you don’t like to wear watches?”

  I still underneath him. “How do you know that?”

  “I’ve known you forever, Sofia. I remember the time your dad bought you a watch for your fifteenth birthday and you never wore it because you said it bugged you when you wore things on your wrist.”

  My heart swells over the fact that he remembers such a mundane detail from so many years ago.

  “Tell me what you were going to say a moment ago.”

  I struggle underneath him, but his weight easily holds me in place.

  “Tell me, Sofia. Tell me what it is you don’t want me to know.”

  “It’s nothing.”

  “Liar. Why would you tease me and tell me that you want me to steal your virginity?”

  I press my lips together in an effort not to let the truth spill from my lips. Maybe it wasn’t a good idea to push him. I was just so embarrassed and angry after his denial and talk about virtue.

  “All right then. Maybe I should go about this a different way.”

  His weight lifts off me and I suck in a full breath now that he’s not pushing me into the mattress. At the same time, I miss the heat of his body close to mine. He rolls me over so my back is on the mattress and he’s hovering over me. I’ve never seen Antonio’s pale-blue eyes so intense before, so determined, and I swallow hard.

  “Let’s try this again.” His voice is softer now, smooth as his hand moves to the belt on my robe, but he doesn’t release it. I inhale. “Now tell me the truth, Sofia…” His finger brushes over the silk until he finds my nipple and he circles it lightly, drawing it into a tight point. “Why did you ask me to take your virginity?”

  I suck in a breath when he pinches my nipple between his finger and thumb, not breaking eye contact with me. I shake my head that I’m not going to answer and he grins as if I’ve given him what he wants. He pulls the edge of the belt and the robe loosens, opening for him, revealing my naked body. He drags his hand from my sternum, between my breasts, and down to my mound. But he doesn’t touch me where I’m craving him most and my hips lift in invitation.

  He clucks his tongue. “Now, now, cara. You don’t get what you need until I get what I want. Tell me the truth, why did you ask me to take your virginity?”

  He continues to roam my body with his hand but not offering any relief. I mewl like a kitten and arch my back again, desperate for him to really touch me. This is pure torture.

  The truth is that I surprised even myself. I hadn’t planned to offer my virginity to him. I hadn’t planned on doing anything with Antonio ever again, but one touch of his fingers and all the strength I’d built up crashed down into a pile of rubble. Because somehow, it just feels right. I’ve been half in love with this man for years, and even though I shouldn’t, I want him to be my first. It will only be a memory I hold sacred my entire life, regardless of the fact that we can’t be together.

  “C’mon, you know you want to tell me.” Antonio’s lips fasten around my nipple and I moan when he sucks hard, adding a sharp sting of pain to the overwhelming pleasure.

  The moment his finger brushes my engorged clit, not enough to give me any real relief but enough to stoke my desire even higher, it’s useless trying to hold out any longer. This man owns my body’s pleasure and I’ll take the risk of telling him the truth if I really want him to give me what I so desperately need.

  “I want it to be you because…”

  When I pause, he laps at my nipple and applies even more pressure to my clit while staring up at me through his dark eyelashes.

  “Because I’ve liked you for years.” The words leave my lips in a whoosh and I hold my breath, waiting for the consequence.

  Antonio’s head snaps up and meets my gaze.

  Surprise.

  “You have?”

  I nod, pressing my lips together. “No one else knows. Not even Mira.”

  His gaze roams my face, then he takes my chin in his hands and presses his lips to mine. He kisses me like a man unmoored, but he doesn’t bother whispering declarations of how he feels the same. I wouldn’t want him to lie to me anyway. I know it wasn’t the same for him. He hasn’t pined over me for years the way I have him. It’s enough that he’s here now and wants me.

  I wrap my arms around him, and he deepens the kiss, coming to lie on top of me. My legs have a mind of their own, spreading so that he can fall between my hips. The hard line of his cock presses against the juncture of my thighs and I can’t help but arch my hips up into him. He groans into my mouth and thrusts against me before pulling away.

  “Are you sure?”

  His kind eyes tell me it’s my call. If I change my mind and ask him to leave, he will.

  I nod. “I’m sure, Antonio.” My hand drifts up to press against his cheek and a pained expression slashes across his face.

  “It won’t change anything. It’s still my duty to marry Aurora.”

  A piece of me loves that he’s worried about my feelings and is being up front and honest with me, but another part of me wants to smack him for daring to say her name in this moment. That woman is like poison even when she’s not around, but I refuse to let her infect this moment.

  At some point, my emotions about not being able to be with Antonio will come crashing down and I’ll be trapped under their rubble, but in the long run, I’ll be grateful to have shared this experience with him. Pain of loss is the cost of love and I’m willing to pay the price to have a brief moment of happiness.

  “I know.”

  He nods then pushes up off the mattress and stands. For a second, I panic, but then I realize that he’s doing so to get undressed. He’s already shirtless and the muscles in his abdomen and arms bunch and move while he tucks his hands under the waistband of his lounge pants.

  I’m not prepared for the sight of him entirely naked. It feels surreal almost. It’s not like I’ve never seen a naked man before—I did have free rein of the internet before I arrived on campus—but I’ve never seen this man naked.

  This man, who is perfection, reminds me of all the statues carved out of marble that I saw when I visited Italy last summer with my parents, except for what hangs between his legs. He’s got the statues beat tenfold in that department.

  His erection stands thick and proud, arching toward his belly button. For the first time tonight, I’m nervous about the idea of it being inside me.

  “Are you scared?” he asks, his tone soft and caring.

  “A little.”

  “I promise I’ll be gentle, Sofia.”

  His hand moves between his legs and he moves it up and down his erection and my fear gives way to arousal. I wouldn’t have thought it would be such a turn-on to see a man touch himself the way he’s doing.

  “Lose the robe.”

  It’s an order and I obey immediately, sitting up and slipping it the rest of the way down my arms and tossing it to the side.

  “Touch yourself.” When I hesitate, his voice becomes firmer. “Do it. You have no idea how many times I’ve imagined just this.”

  His words give me confidence and I place my hand between my legs, as I’ve done so many times before.

  Antonio studies me for a long moment, licking his lips, his hand pumping up and down his shaft. He takes one step toward the bed then stills, cringes, and pushes a hand through his hair. “I don’t have a condom with me. I have some in my room…”

  The last thing I want is for him to leave. What if he changes his mind once he leaves my dorm room and doesn’t return?

 

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