Choking the chicken, spanking the monkey, airing the orchid-whatever you call it, none of the images in this book will encourage the gentle art of self-pleasure. This deceptively simple and strangely addictive book presents a laugh-out-loud collection of random pictures virtually guaranteed to dampen the urge of even the strongest libido.

Graham Johnson was a fresh-faced journalist with an ambition to break the big news stories and make his name as a star reporter when an offer came in to work at a leading tabloid... he couldn't say no. Instantly, he found himself drawn into a world of sleaze, spin and corruption - where bending the law was justifiable in the hunt for the big-selling story and bending the truth was the norm. Against his better judgement, Graham found his niche in this new world and, what's more, he found that he was good at it. In his time at first the News of the World then the Sunday Mirror, he made a name for himself as a man who could deliver the story, no matter what - a kind of tabloid terrorist who rifled through celebrity's rubbish bins, staked out politicians' hotel rooms, and paid-up page three girls to seduce Premiership footballers, all in the name of scoring a front-page story. Hack is a compelling and intoxicating story of one man's time in the tabloid jungle - a world...

'If those pricks want a war, lad, we'll show what some proper soljas can do.'Dylan, Nogger and their crew 'tax' rival drug dealers using a red-hot steam iron and celebrate by making videos of themselves raping wannabe WAGs. In their world, guns and knives are as common as mobile phones. But when an innocent three-year-old girl is killed in the crossfire, extreme measures are brought in to combat gang warfare. From burgeoning organised crime to warped celebrity culture, Gang War is an apocalyptic vision of a world in freefall.The gripping debut novel by the bestselling author of Powder Wars is a mind-blowing tale that is all the more shocking because it is inspired by real-life events.

When ruthless drug baron John Haase was sentenced to 18 years' imprisonment for heroin-trafficking in 1995, it was a major victory for Customs and the police. But in a shock move, after Haase and his partner Paul Bennett had served only 11 months, then Home Secretary Michael Howard signed a Royal Pardon for their release. Howard defended his decision by revealing that Haase and Bennett had become invaluable informants. But Haase had in fact duped the authorities, and far from being forced into hiding as a supergrass, he gained new kudos among the criminal underworld for beating the system so audaciously. Graham Johnson interviewed Haase at Whitemoor prison and has obtained a copy of his sworn affidavit revealing the truth behind the Royal Pardon scandal. Allegations of huge bribes, mass fabrication of evidence and dark powers at the heart of the justice system make this an explosive exposé of Britain's number-one drug kingpin.

Drug dealers beware. The Devil is coming to get you. Gangster Stephen French invented the perfect crime: robbing drug barons of their huge fortunes. In SAS-style swoops, French raided their fortified mansions and tortured them with horrifying violence until they paid up. Through 'taxing' the richest and most powerful crimelords in the UK, he netted over £20 million.French was no ordinary criminal. He was a world-champion fighter, he studied psychology at university to master mind-control techniques, and he used the teachings of Machiavelli and samurai warriors to outwit his enemies. The Devil also reveals French's complex relationship with Curtis Warren, the wealthiest criminal in British history. The two were childhood pals, then partners and finally bitter enemies.Now a legitimate businessman, French built up a multimillion-pound empire. Having eventually turned his back on his former life, he is now seeking to set the record straight.

Gangster Paul Grimes was a one-man crimewave with a breathtaking capacity to steal. Any villains who got in his way were made to pay -- often with their blood. But when his son died of a drugs overdose, the old-school mobster swore revenge on the new generation of Liverpool-based heroin and cocaine dealers. Against all odds, he turned undercover informant. The first gangster to fall foul of Grimes' change of heart was Curtis Warren, aka 'Cocky', the wealthiest and most successful criminal in British history. Grimes infiltrated his cocaine cartel and led Customs to the largest narcotics seizure on record, putting Warren in the dock in the drugs trial of the twentieth century. After turning his attention to heroin baron John Haase, Grimes rose to become the boss of the villain's notoriously bloodthirsty 'security firm' -- a professional gang of racketeers addicted to cocaine, explosive violence and non-stop criminality. But as his net began to tighten, Grimes was confronted...