The Boys Down South, page 26
I simply nodded. I was waiting on the cursing and name-calling.
“What you did… I almost let it destroy Bray and me. I hated him. Blamed him. But then one day, I realized I loved my brother more than I ever loved you. I had to forgive. Move on. You were gone. Bray was in a dark place with his issues. This had just set it off. Bray isn’t like me. Hell, he isn’t like the rest of us. He’s twisted in a way we all have to accept. What he did shouldn’t have surprised me. What you did, however, was shocking. Painful.”
I started to say I was sorry because I was. But he held up his hand to stop me from speaking. “Just let me get this all out. I don’t need you to speak. I’ve heard enough from you already.”
He spoke to me as if I were the most distasteful thing he’d ever experienced. That stung.
“I found happiness again. I found real happiness. Sadie loves me. Really loves me. She doesn’t give Bray longing glances. Ones I had seen you do and refused to believe. I saw hints. I just didn’t want to think it was true. It was my fault too for ignoring the obvious.”
“I feel sorry for you. Bray doesn’t love. His world revolves around lust and taking what feels good. What he wants. You fell into that. Got sucked right in. He used you for his pleasure. It was as unfair to you as it was to me. But again, I love my brother. I can forgive his insaneness. As for you, there is no forgiveness. I have nothing to forgive. I just feel pity for you.”
He stopped talking then.
I stood there, waiting for him to say more, but he was done. I opened my mouth to say something. But no words came. He felt sorry for me. He had no idea. My loving Bray was the last thing he should pity. There were more painful things. Things he’d never know.
We had something in common.
“I do too,” I finally replied.
He frowned “What?”
I shrugged. “We agree on something. I feel sorry for me too. Now, if you’re done, I’d like to return to the party.”
Brent didn’t reply right away. He had thought his words would hurt me. Cause tears or drama. That Scarlet was no more. After a few moments, he simply nodded.
“Goodbye Brent, and for what it is worth, I am happy you found love. The real kind.” I didn’t stay to hear his response or see his expression. I walked away. Back to the tent. One more door closed firmly behind me.
12
bray
Eight minutes and fifteen seconds. That’s how long Scarlet had been talking to Brent. I shouldn’t have been timing them. I shouldn’t have fucking cared. But I did.
Scarlet came back from behind the house first. Her chin, once again, lifted up a notch, and her shoulders straight. She looked determined. I watched her as she scanned the crowd then walked toward the drinks. Her eyes had skipped right past me. She’d known I was here and it had been a deliberate move. One that made me smile despite myself.
There had always been a fire about Scarlet that drew me in. She threw caution to the wind and did exactly what she wanted. Went after the thrill and excitement in life. I appreciated it. Wanted to get a taste of it. Tame her.
She was different now. That fire had been replaced with something else. She wasn’t out for her own pleasure anymore. There was a look in her eyes that was harder than before. Scarlet had always been tough, but this was not the same. It intrigued me.
Brent’s reappearance caught my attention and I saw Sadie, whatever her last name was, run toward him with a bright smile. His serious expression turned softer. She made him happy. Sadie was the kind of girl Brent belonged with. They fit. Scarlet was too much for Brent… too much passion, too much wildness.
I shifted my gaze back to Scarlet to see if she was watching Brent and Sadie. She wasn’t. She was getting punch, oblivious to her surroundings. Dallas walked up to her, yet again, and it fucking annoyed me. Who did he think he was? Her damn guardian. Jesus the kid needed to back the fuck off.
Scarlet looked up at him with relief in her eyes. There wasn’t attraction or interest. She was just thankful to have a friend. I shouldn’t give a shit. But I felt myself relax when I saw her visibly ease up on all that tension that had, had her so stiff.
He said something and she laughed. Dallas was good with women. He had been since birth. I forced myself to look away from the two of them and reached for another beer before going to find myself a distraction. Anything to keep me from watching her every damn move.
Dallas and Dixie would watch over her. She wasn’t here alone. It wasn’t my job to care if she had someone with her or not. She was a big girl. One who regretted me. I was sure a lot of females regretted me. But Scarlet had owned me in ways no one else had. Her regret struck deep. Simply put—I gave a fuck.
Moving from my spot by the bar, I made my way toward Dixie’s cousin. I’d caught her eyes on me enough times to know she was inviting me over. It had started at the rehearsal last night. She had watched me more than the wedding director. I had other plans last night though. She wasn’t in them. But tonight, she may be.
Dixie had introduced her, but I had no idea what her name was. I hadn’t been paying attention. But the dark brown curls and big blue eyes were a good combination. She had nice curves too. I could get distracted enough to make it through this evening.
Her eyes lit up as I locked mine on hers and made my way in her direction. I watched as she tried to subtly shift her stance into a more attractive one. The kind where her tits were on display and her legs were in better view.
I didn’t know the other girls she was standing with. They weren’t from here. Had to be out of town family or friends. I did a quick glance to see if one of them was more appealing, but decided I would stick with her. The others looked slightly frightened of me.
“Hello, Bray,” the girl said with a drawl that was southern but not from Alabama. Even better. She wasn’t even from the state.
I nodded. “Hello, ladies,” I replied, giving the others a quick glance, then locked back on her. “We haven’t officially met,” I then told her, hoping I’d get a name then.
She blushed and her eyes sparkled with excitement. Normally that was all it took for me, but with Scarlet in the vicinity, it was hard to concentrate on this attempt at a distraction.
She tilted her head and let her curls fall over her left shoulder. “I’m Meg,” she replied. “Dixie’s cousin.”
Meg. Easy to remember. Nothing like Scarlet. I had to stay away from any name remotely close to Scarlet’s. I’d hooked up with a Samantha and the S was too much on me, apparently, because in the middle of sex, I’d called her Scarlet… twice.
“You’re not from around here,” I said, trying to get the exact distance she was from me before pursuing this any further. The farther the better. No clingy stuff.
“I’m from Savannah,” she said, making her drawl even thicker as she said it. That must work for her with other men.
“Bray, I need to talk to you a moment,” Asher interrupted me. “Hello ladies. I hope you’re enjoying yourself,” he then said to the females.
Meg didn’t look pleased about his sudden appearance. But she managed a tight smile for him. “It’s beautiful. All of it!” the blonde beside Meg said with too much enthusiasm.
Asher nodded. “Good. Please help yourself to the refreshments. The meal will begin soon. If you’ll excuse us, I need my brother for a moment.”
The other girls thanked him and said their silly responses. Meg, however, was frustrated.
I winked at her before following my brother away from the tent and toward the hill that led to Dixie’s house. Once we were safely out of earshot to the other guests, he stopped and turned to me.
“She’s Dixie’s cousin. Don’t go there,” Asher said.
“She wants it. She’s been eye-fucking me since last night.”
Asher sighed. “Meg is just getting over a broken engagement. She’s not emotionally ready for you to take her in the barn and use her to forget Scarlet is here. Don’t do this.”
“Sounds to me like she needs a good, hot fuck. Not being ignored by the guy she’s been checking out since she got here,” I stated.
“Jesus, Bray. Don’t be so damn insensitive. The girl is hurting.”
I smirked. “No, she needs someone to show her she’s sexy and to reassure her that the sex with her ex wasn’t that good. I figure I can conquer both those in about twenty minutes.”
Asher scowled at me. “I’m asking you not to go there. Can’t you leave the guests alone and go out tonight and find someone to make you forget Scarlet?”
Forgetting Scarlet wasn’t happening. Not when she was here. Not when all I had to do was scan the crowd to find her. Whoever I fucked would have her face in my head. It would be Scarlet I was fucking.
“Fine. It’s your wedding day. I’ll back off if that’s what you want. But I think she’s going to be disappointed. Her ego needed a boost. I was willing to boost it.”
Asher frowned and looked back at the tent. “It’ll upset Dixie. Meg may want your attention and gladly go to the barn with you. But Dixie will worry.”
That I understood. I didn’t like it or agree, but I got what he was saying.
“I’ll go back to the bar then. Keep to myself.”
“I’d say go mingle with the others, but that’s not you. Don’t drink too much though. Momma will chew your ass.”
“Too late. She’s already got after me for missing the pictures.”
Asher grinned then. “You fucking deserved it.”
Possibly. But I still didn’t give a fuck.
13
scarlet
The guests were being seated for the meal. Although I dreaded this part, sitting at a table with both Bray and Brent, it also meant the evening would be closer to the end. I could leave. Go back to my trailer. My job. My solitude. I’d never realized just how comforting loneliness was until I let go of needing people.
Dixie’s eyes found mine and she smiled brightly. I walked toward her as she waved me that way. I wasn’t part of the wedding party. To everyone else, this would look odd. Me sitting here at their table. But if it’s what Dixie wanted then I was doing it. I didn’t care what people thought of me. That was something I’d dealt with my entire life. The whispers and judgment about my mother. She deserved it all, of course.
“I’ll walk you to your seat,” Dallas said beside me. I’d forgotten he was there. He’d been quiet the last few minutes. His endless chatter had stopped when something else had caught his attention.
“Thanks,” I told him. I was thankful for his standing beside me through the socializing part. After having to face Bray then Brent, I wasn’t emotionally stable enough to walk around and pretend all was okay with me. Nothing was okay with me.
He walked me right up to Dixie then pulled out the chair beside her. “This where you want her?” Dallas asked Dixie.
“Yes, thank you Dallas,” Dixie replied as she grabbed my hand in hers. “This is how it should be,” she told me.
I tried not to tear up, but I did a little. My eyes stung. “Who was supposed to sit here?” I asked.
“Meg but she’s moved down one. I told her already. She doesn’t mind.”
I didn’t like Meg very much right now. I’d seen Bray go over and talk to her. She’d flirted and batted her eyelashes at him. It had been ridiculous. And exactly what I should expect.
My face must have given my thoughts away because Dixie leaned in close to my ear. “You know how Bray is. Asher made sure nothing would happen. He spoke to Bray,” she whispered.
I had witnessed that too. I’d known immediately when Asher showed up and took Bray away from the females what was happening. The relief I’d felt was ridiculous. As if I had any reason to care. There was nothing between me and Bray. All it had ever been was lust on his part. I had never been special to him. He’d never treated me the way a man in love treats a woman. But he had been what I wanted. He’d been an escape.
“It’s fine,” I assured her.
“I saw you leave with Brent. Everything okay there?” she asked.
I nodded. “Closure,” I told her.
She gave me a kiss on my cheek. “Thank you for being here. I know this was hard to do.”
I leaned into her and hugged her waist. “You’re more important to me than them… than that.”
Dixie sighed. As if she didn’t quite believe me but wasn’t going to argue.
The boys began arriving and taking their seats. Asher smiled lovingly at Dixie then gave me a nod. “Hello ladies. I’m starving.”
Dixie laughed and went into his arms, laying her head on his chest. They’d been doing that a lot today. It was as if she couldn’t get close enough to him. I imagined that was a safe, wonderful feeling. One I was never going to know. I envied her that.
“Let’s eat,” Dallas said with excitement.
Meg arrived beside me and I forced a smile at her as I sat down. “Hello, Meg.”
She had visited Dixie, maybe once a year, a few times when we were in junior high, but I’d barely seen her over the past five years. She’d grown to be beautiful. Her braces and freckles had morphed into something much more appealing.
Her bright white very straight smile was worth the braces she had worn for many years. “Hey, Scarlet. I’m glad you got to come. I know it made Dixie’s day having you here.”
“Me too. I didn’t want to miss it.” I wasn’t sure what part of the story, if any, she might know. I’d go along with the friendliness.
“Hello, I’m Sadie.” A pretty blonde said leaning over Meg and holding her hand out. This was Brent’s girlfriend. She was pretty and looked sweet. Exactly what he needed. I had never been sweet.
“Scarlet, nice to meet you,” I told her, shaking her hand formally.
She seemed pleased and completely oblivious to who I was. “You’re Dixie’s best friend? Right? Brent said you had come to town as a surprise. That’s great,” she said as she let go of my hand and sat down next to Meg, still leaning forward to see me.
“Yes. I got off work at the last minute and was able to get here.” It wasn’t a complete lie.
“That’s awesome!” she said with more enthusiasm than was necessary.
The last girl I didn’t know walked up and smiled at Sadie then whispered. They began chatting and she didn’t appear to be interested in me. Glad not to have to go through another introduction, I relaxed and took a drink of the water in front of me.
“Shelly is a bit of an ass. At least from what I have seen. She’s a friend of Dixie’s from physical rehab. She volunteers there and worked with Dixie for awhile. They became friends. But she’s not the nicest person. She’s kind of rude and blunt. No filter at all,” Meg whispered beside me.
At least I understood why she was a bridesmaid now. She’d worked with Dixie during a hard time. Dixie could accept any personality. I was proof of that. When you’re as sweet as Dixie, no one is ever rude to you.
“I’m fine without getting an introduction,” I told her.
Meg smirked. “She had her eye on Bray and he picked me to talk to today.” She sighed. “Until Asher put a stop to it, of course. But he didn’t go speak to her and she’s being nasty about it.”
Always Bray. His sexy, bad boy swagger intrigued them all. It had me too at first. Until it was more. Intense. I began to cling to it, to him. That had been my mistake.
“Bray doesn’t seem like the kind to obey anyone though. I wonder if I still might have a chance,” Meg added wistfully.
This was where I should keep my mouth shut. Not talk. Just nod and listen.
“If you want a quick fuck then Bray’s your guy. If you want a call back, then go for Steel. He’s the better man.” Even as I said it, I felt guilty. I knew there was more to Bray. That deep down he was a good man. He could be. He didn’t show that to the world, but I knew he had it in him. Saying he didn’t felt wrong.
“That’s what I’ve heard. But that’s all I need. I go back home tomorrow. No plans of returning any time soon,” Meg replied with a naughty grin. She had no idea how addicting Bray Sutton could be.
A server appeared in front of us and began filling our wine glasses. It gave me something else to do. Drink the wine. Ignore the Bray girl talk. Pretend like Meg wasn’t going to be touched by Bray tonight. Because she was right. Bray didn’t care about rules. He wasn’t listening to any commands. He’d respect them until Asher and Dixie drove away. Then he’d go get Meg and change her world.
Unable to help myself, I glanced down the table and watched Bray drink from his glass. He was looking straight ahead and Brent was speaking to him. I saw him barely lift his shoulder in response to whatever Brent had said. Brent appeared annoyed and reached for his glass. When I started to look away, Bray’s gaze swung to me, and I froze. He had known I was watching him. I could see it there in his expression. It was fierce. It was knee-weakening and he was challenging me.
I should look away. Someone would notice. But the longer he stared at me, the harder it was to let go of that. I missed him. Even though being with him had caused pain over and over. Being without him was harder. Or maybe it was all this love and joy around me. Making me think I could have had that. It would have never happened with Bray. I knew that.
Dixie’s hand rested on my knee and squeezed. I jerked my gaze off his and studied my glass instead, as I calmed my heart rate that had accelerated. He was still watching me. The heat from his gaze was making my spine tingle. Damn you, Bray Sutton.
A server placed salad in front of us, and although my stomach was too tied up in knots to eat, I was thankful for something to do. Anything to keep from looking at him again.
“It’s just him, isn’t it?” Dixie whispered.
