The Boys Down South, page 13
Dallas shook his head. “Seriously, Bray, you got some shit to work out. She needs to leave with Dixie.”
Asher finally looked at me. “Step away from this. If you’re hurt, I’ll end up killing him.” He wasn’t exaggerating. That wasn’t a threat. He was serious. I moved back then. I wasn’t sure how I felt about that. Knowing he’d physically hurt his brother over me.
“You need to leave with Dixie. And Dallas needs to take you both home,” Asher told Scarlet. I looked at her pleadingly. She needed to listen to him. This was only getting worse with her being here.
“Okay,” Scarlet agreed, “but don’t hurt him again. I did this. It was all me. I played games and caused this. I just wanted him…” She didn’t finish. She’d said enough. Enough to cause damage. Was this what Asher didn’t want to happen between him and Steel?
Asher swore again and shook his head, then pointed to Dallas’s truck. “Take ‘em home. Then you need to come back.”
Dallas nodded. No one was arguing with Asher. “Let’s go,” he said to both of us and I walked over to stand beside Scarlet. Dallas let her go and put a hand on both our shoulders. “My truck,” he said in a low voice.
Scarlet looked at me then. She was scared and she was sorry. I could read the regret in her eyes. But she also was worried about me. Because of Asher’s actions. He hadn’t hit Bray over Scarlet. He’d hit him because of how he spoke to me. But what did I do with that? I couldn’t hope. After tonight, after this, I couldn’t be what came between them and it was clear that I was. I’d end things before that ever happened. It was what Scarlet should have done in the first place. I turned back to see all of them squared off, bodies tense, and blue lights coming down the road. The cops had been called. Wouldn’t be the first time the Sutton boys were greeted by the police. It was a good thing. Otherwise, this could all get so much worse.
19
bray
Brent’s truck was parked out by the barn when I finally came home. So was Asher’s and Steele’s. Only the old, rusted farm truck was missing. I headed for the barn, not sure what I was about to face. There was a good chance they would all take turns beating the shit out of me.
When Brent would be ready to listen, I would find a way to explain it to him. But if he needed to hit me until his hand was bruised, I’d let him. I owed him that much. I handled this wrong. I wouldn’t apologize for needing Scarlet. That was something I wasn’t going to do. Because I needed her. I hadn’t been sure that I could ever feel any real emotion until Scarlet managed to get under my skin and wedge herself firmly in my heart. It was like I had walked through life without understanding passion, jealousy or even love…before her. I’d only known anger. It was a numbness I never wanted to live with again.
Scarlet changed all that for me. Maybe I was obsessed. Fuck, maybe I needed a new medication. But I needed to touch Scarlet and feel her to experience real pleasure. She gave me something I didn’t know existed and now I wasn’t willing to let that go. Not even for my brother.
I opened the barn door and Asher turned to look at me. He was the only one in there. And he was going to hand me my ass now that I was home. I was prepared for that. As long as I had Scarlet. As long as she was mine, I would happily take whatever they wanted to give me.
“He’s out helping Steel,” Asher informed me.
I nodded. I wasn’t sure what he thought I should do. Go find him? He’d be back soon enough. I turned to walk back out of the barn. I needed a shower. Sleeping outside in the back of my truck all night hadn’t left me smelling good. I could still smell Scarlet and sex on my hands, too. I didn’t want to wash her off, but I also knew the sex smell would have told my brothers more than any of them needed or wanted to know.
“She came by to see him,” Asher said just before I walked out the door.
I froze. I didn’t want Scarlet coming to see Brent or anyone else for that matter. I had unleashed some kind of fucking monster last night when I’d allowed myself to lay claim to her. My hands clenched tightly into fists at my side at the thought of her apologizing to Brent.
“When,” I bit out through my teeth.
“About three hours ago,” Asher replied.
I took a deep breath through my nose and tried like hell to calm the fuck down. “What did she say?”
“She said she’d been selfish and she was sorry,” Asher informed me.
My heart slammed against my chest and I grabbed the doorframe to keep from putting my fist through a wall. “Did he touch her?” If he had, I wouldn’t be able to control myself.
“No. She didn’t get within ten feet of him when she spoke to him,” he said slowly. “Bray, what the hell is wrong with you? You’re acting like someone fucked your girlfriend. Not the other way around.”
I ripped off the door and tossed it aside, before glaring back at Asher. “She’s mine.”
Asher raised his eyebrows. “She was Brent’s. You didn’t respect that.”
“No,” I roared, taking a step toward him. “She was always mine.”
Asher studied me, but he didn’t move. He didn’t even flinch. “What’s happened to you?”
How would I explain to him, to any of them, how Scarlet made me feel? What she gave me. I felt my body begin to shake.
“You okay… what’s wrong? Look at me, Bray.” The concern in Asher’s voice snapped me out of the panic that was starting to squeeze my lungs. I had to find Scarlet. I needed her to touch me. To ease this.
“I gotta go,” I said, before turning and stalking back to my truck. I needed to get to Scarlet first; everything else could wait. She’d been here and she’d talked to Brent. I had to know what he said to her. I needed her to tell me it was still me she wanted.
The slamming of a car door caught my attention and I turned to see Dixie standing beside her car with tears streaming down her face.
“What’s wrong?” Asher called out as he walked past me hell bent on getting to Dixie.
“Careful, bro. She belongs to Steel,” I said causing him to stop and swing a warning glare toward me.
Didn’t feel so good when someone told you your woman was someone else’s, did it? Maybe he’d remember that next time.
“She’s gone,” Dixie said, looking at me instead of Asher.
My lungs seized up and my pulse sped up. The world around me faded away. “No,” was all I could get out.
Dixie looked at Asher and covered her mouth on a sob. “She left me a note. She said she wasn’t her mother. She had to fix what she’d done.”
No. No. No.
Scarlet was not gone. She didn’t leave me. She knew she couldn’t leave me. I made it very clear to her last night.
“No!” My voice didn’t even sound like mine. I was moving toward Dixie now. I had to stop her from saying any more lies.
Asher was in my face and he shoved me back until I stumbled. “Get a hold of yourself. Jesus! You’ve lost your mind. What is fucking wrong with you?”
“No!” I yelled at the top of my lungs again, letting all the fear and panic that was trying to take hold of me grip me even tighter.
“Oh, fuck.” Asher’s voice was out there somewhere. I heard it, but I couldn’t focus on what he was saying.
“Go find Steel.”
“It’s his meds. Shit, I should have realized this sooner.”
“What meds?”
“They aren’t working.”
“Asher, what meds?”
Their voices faded out completely until it was all black. And I roared with the pain taking over my chest. She’d left me. I was hollow again.
20
asher
When Bray refused to go to counseling over his temper issues, the doctor prescribed an antidepressant he said helped with anger management. It had. A lot. It kept Bray calm. For the past five years, he rarely ever lost his temper. He was laid back and a smartass. I should have noticed he’d been different since I got home. There was no telling how long he’d been off them. He’d covered it up well. Until two nights ago.
Scarlet’s leaving was for the best. I knew Dixie was going to miss her and I hated that for her, but my brothers needed time. If I had to drag Bray to a counselor and sit there with him twice a week, I was prepared to do it. There was something deep inside him none of us knew how to help him overcome. Something that haunted him. Controlled him. He needed help. More than a damn pill could do.
We’d kept his issue and the fact he needed medication for it from the others. Only I knew. Momma had asked me to talk him into taking it in the beginning. She couldn’t get him to do it. I’d somehow managed to convince him he needed them. But with me gone, he’d decided to go off them. I knew that after this, I wasn’t going to be able to return to Florida. I’d go back for a small break, but I was needed here. Momma would tell me I wasn’t, that I should go live my life, but I knew better. The boys needed me. Momma needed me. I shouldn’t have left to begin with.
“Asher, I need you to deliver a load to Luke Monroe, if you will,” Denver called out from the back door of Watson’s Feed and Seed. I was unloading a truck and restocking. The sun was hot as hell and normally I liked doing deliveries. But not this time. Not to Luke Monroe’s. Not today. Not after the other night. Avoiding Dixie was the only way I managed to stay sane. In the last forty-eight hours, I had to deal with her more than I could bare because it made me miss her even more. Our bond was still there. Even when hell was breaking loose, it was there. However, telling my boss I wasn’t going to do my job because of a girl wasn’t exactly an option. I swore under my breath and called back, “Okay, what’s he need?”
“Hannah is bringing you the list. She’s the one who took the order.”
And this just kept getting better and better. Hannah liked having an excuse to come out here and see me. If she didn’t have an order for me, she brought me a drink. It was nice of her to do that, but I knew by the way she was smiling and giggling that it wasn’t because she thought I was thirsty. Hannah wanted us to become more. She wasn’t hard on the eyes and unlike some of the other girls in town, she was also intelligent and ambitious. I’d heard all about her plans after college. Hannah was organized, even more so than me, she liked current events and chatted on a lot about politics. I listened, but didn’t say much. She had a nice voice, and if only briefly, she’d distracted me from my thoughts of Dixie. But it was short-lived.
I wiped my forehead with the towel I kept tucked in my pocket. When sweat got into my eyes, with dirt mixed in, it burned like a motherfucker. Before I could prepare myself for going to Luke’s, Hannah came strutting to the back. Her navy shorts were showing every inch of her legs. One centimeter shorter and her rounded ass cheeks would peep out for all to see. The pale yellow tank top she was wearing was the only thing covering her tits. No bra. I wondered why Denver let her dress that way. Display herself like that.
“Need help loading this stuff,” she asked as she all but bounced walking toward me, grinning and selling it.
“Thanks, but I got it,” I replied.
She always smiled, perennially happy about life, which I envied and often wondered what that felt like. But she wasn’t dressed for manual labor. She never was, yet she always offered to help me.
“I can ride with you,” she said, as if she was being helpful.
Taking Hannah with me would keep me from being alone while going to Dixie’s for the first time since this all happened. But I had demons to face and needed the quiet of my truck to prepare myself mentally. Dixie was very likely going to marry Steel. I had to accept that. Move on, though I wasn’t sure yet how I was going to do that. Although Bray’s reaction wasn’t healthy or normal, I understood his desperation. I felt the same way. I just reacted differently.
“I’m sure you’re needed at the front desk. I got this. But thanks,” I told her as gently as I could. She moved closer and closer every time she rode with me. I was concerned Hannah would be plastering herself up against me soon. Again, she was easy on the eyes and it wasn’t hard having her pressed against my body that way; I just wasn’t ready. As much as I wished I was, I wasn’t, but she kept trying anyway. I respected her enough not to use her. I didn’t think she saw it that way. That’s what worried me most.
“I’d rather be with you,” she replied, her voice dropping into a husky tone that was intended to be sexy. She wasn’t trying to be subtle at all as she rubbed her chest against my left arm.
I stepped back and reached for a bag of feed. I wasn’t even sure what kind I was holding. “Uh, Hannah, I’m flattered. But we both work for your dad and I don’t think that, uh, well…” I really sucked at this, “I think this is a bad idea.”
She pouted. Looked damn good pouting, too. But not good enough to make me forget where I’d be going with her.
“I just knew going to the Monroe’s might be tough on you. I wanted to be there for support, if you needed any…support. I can think of a few ways I could help ease any ache…or suffering that going there might cause you.”
Her eyes went to my cock as she spoke. I’d be lying if I said I didn’t consider it. I was a man, but I didn’t hesitate when I said, “Thanks Hannah, but it’s best if we keep this a friend thing, if that’s okay with you?”
She sighed and dropped the seductive gaze she’d been giving me. She looked more like old Hannah now. Sweet, kind Hannah, but in fewer clothes than she’d been wearing that very first day when I started working there. Her clothing had gotten skimpier and skimpier by the day, and by the end of next week, if she continued at her current pace, Hannah would be coming to work naked. Maybe her daddy would notice then.
“You’re always going to love Dixie Monroe, aren’t you, Asher Sutton?” She wasn’t talking in her sultry voice anymore. She was back to being herself. I thought about denying it, but I knew Hannah wouldn’t tell anyone, no matter my response. It would stay between us and I needed to say it, admit it to someone. Anyone.
“Yeah, I will, but I let her go, and she moved on.”
She frowned. “Why did you break up with her? That’s a mystery no one has ever understood.”
“It’s complicated.” I wasn’t telling anyone that. Not Hannah. Not a fucking soul.
She nodded as if she understood, when I knew she didn’t, couldn’t and wouldn’t. “Okay, Asher, I get it. But when you’re tired of seeing her with your brother and you’re ready to move on to something else, don’t forget me. I can wait.”
“If that day ever comes, you’ll be first I call.”
That brought a smile to her face. I liked seeing her smile. I didn’t want to think I’d been the one to take her ever-present smile away. “I could still go with you for moral support. As a fellow employee.”
I considered it. Having Hannah with me would’ve made it less awkward, but then again, it could’ve made things even more awkward, too. I shook my head. “Not this time. This is something I need to get over and deal with…but thank you for asking, Hannah.”
She shrugged her shoulders. “Okay, good luck, then.”
“Thanks.” Best thing I could have hoped for was for Dixie not to be home. Then I could unload, talk to Luke about work, and leave as quickly as possible.
Loading the truck didn’t take me long. I was on the road and headed to the Monroe’s in about twenty minutes. Had Hannah been sitting in the seat beside me, I might have felt a false sense of security. But that was all it would’ve been. No matter who was there, I had to face them eventually, see this through. And if Dixie was there, then I’d have to talk to her. Talk to her like my brother’s girlfriend. Accept what I said and what had to be, knowing she loved me, too. That was the hardest part. Knowing that my heart wasn’t the only one I broke. If there had been a way to save Steel in all this, I would’ve done it, but I didn’t see any other way to escape the truth.
Pulling the truck onto the dirt road that ran beside Luke’s big barn, I saw only his truck sitting there. Relieved by that, I parked and jumped down. I planned on making some small talk, unloading the truck, and being gone in no time at all.
“I can help you unload that, Asher.” Dixie’s sweet, southern drawl stopped me in my tracks.
Motherfucking shit.
21
dixie
I’d heard Daddy on the phone placing his order from Watson’s Feed and Seed. He didn’t know that Asher was likely to be delivering the order for them. I did. I knew it would be him. When Momma said that she had lunch ready, I told him to go on and eat with her, that I’d go out to the barn in case the delivery came. Oddly enough, he seemed fine with that. I expected it to be harder. He trusted me, but he was fatherly suspicious, as all good fathers were.
Asher’s back was still to me. He hadn’t turned around. He’d been expecting my dad and was obviously surprised when I was the one waiting there. I was relieved Hannah Watson didn’t climb from the truck. I wasn’t sure what my plan would have been if she’d been there with him. I was only focused on Asher, on speaking to him alone, even though I knew this was wrong. Even if he’d said it was over between us, I wanted to hear his voice again. See if it was truly over between us.
“Dad’s eating lunch,” I said, hoping he’d look at me.
His shoulders sagged and I felt somewhat guilty. The last two days had been hard on him. Having Scarlet rip Bray and Brent apart had been tough on all of them. He slowly turned to face me. “I’m having a hard time believing your daddy left you out here to take this delivery from me.”
Nonchalantly, I lifted my left shoulder. “He might not have known you worked for Denver.”
Asher shook his head and turned his gaze to the house. “Best I unload this and be on my way.”
He didn’t want to look at me. I knew that. Hated it even more. Did he sense desperation in my voice? Did he think that after the other night I expected more? That his showing how he felt for me by beating Bray’s face in would confuse me. Well, it did. But it also showed me that Asher was never going to hurt Steel. I had other plans. Another idea.
